by Bull Run » Mon Dec 12, 2011 11:48 am
It's hard to be able to really give you solid advice about what to do because everyone's game is different so you could be doing some things that would work for you but not for any one else and vice versa. Having said that, I think the issue is less of a problem with your age as much as it is an issue with your value.
This may sound counter-intuitive but over the last year or so that you've been able to nail down your game and improve with women you've raised your sexual market value (SMV). This is a natural by-product of game. Not only do you gain confidence and savvy but you probably also looked at other aspects of your life to make game easier for you to spit out i.e. working out more, eating better, finding new hobbies, improving your style, etc.
All of that work that you did served the purpose of helping you attract and seduce more women than you did before. In the process, you may have inadverently raised your SMV beyond that which is comfortable for a women that were originally your targets. In other words, you could have raised your value so high that it's intimidating for women. Especially younger women. An example from my life is how my physique has changed since I started in the community. As my arms/chest/etc have gotten more noticably larger women have grown more noticably intimidated by me when I would approach them (even if they do very often grab/touch my arms unconsciously...I've had to point it out several times).
So, I had to change the way I approached to make myself less intimidating. Also, it doesn't help that I dig small, petite women. When a guy that's 6ft, weighs 225, who clearly works out approaches a chick that's 5' to 5'4" weighing 110 - 120lbs in a loud bar and does so with a lot of confidence and promient body language it can be super, super intimidating for her. Shit, my ex would never fight with me face-to-face because she was scared I would get mad, lose my temper, and hit her (I never did or would do that...but even me raising my voice to her scared the shit out of her because she knew I could really hurt her if I chose to do so). She loved the extra muscles (she begged to work out with me so she could watch me because it turned her on) but they were also a source of angst. Even though women (almost universally, but not always) like the extra muscles, they still find it intimidating...because you're physically imposing but also because it raises your value so much: they feel safer, you look healthier, implies a good work ethic meaning you're willing to do what it takes to achieve goals, etc. I've heard the same dynamic from guys that are really, really physically attractive. Being confident and good looking gets you cast in the douche category more times that you'd think.
So, I think what you're really dealing with is a widening gap in your SMV. Almost every younger woman prefers to be with older men. Your wisdom, savvy, confidence, calm demeanor, material success, etc. is like catnip to women. But, all of that value can disqualify yourself to her. What would this guy ever want with me? I've picked up women that were geniunely surprised that I wanted to go out with them...they just thought I was in a different league than them. The cool, good girls are the ones that acknowledge their SMV in a realistic way. They know what is and what is not feasible for them to attract and keep. Sometimes, too much value can be a hinderance. A lot of my past LTRs were this way. The girl always just had this underlying angst that she was playing out of her league (this can be a super effective compliance technique in an LTR but can be counter-productive during the seduction phase). Think Adrian from Rocky. She was, initially, shocked that Rocky was interested in her.
On the flip side, some women simply have hard and fast rules about how much older they're willing to go. It's not rational and it doesn't make an ounce of sense but that's what they do. Some girls just won't date a guy that's x number of years older than them. I'm not sure there's a lot you can do to change that dynamic. Just like some girls won't date outside their race, date a younger guy, etc.
If it is the SMV then you need to do one of two things: learn how to hide or diffuse some of your value, there's no need to DHV when the gap between your SMV and her perceived SMV is large (part of this is no longer negging her as much or as harshly) OR raise your standards OR lie about your age.
The difference is indifference.