FR: First Report - Opinions Welcome

[Check_Mate]

There’s another post out there with the intro to this Field Report, let me summarize it: This weekend marked my very first night out after finding the community. My biggest sticking points are opening and attraction phase. This sat night my band performed for the first time. As a result of my status as a musician and my difficulties with the attraction phase, I know a lot of HB's that like to dance samba and love to have me around but are not particularly interested in me. My plan of action is as follows: I'm going to use them as pivots while brushing up on my skills to attract other HB's who don't know my old AFC self. While doing this, the pivots will most likely get more attracted to me seeing how i've changed.

So Sat night I got to the concert a in a rush to help set up the sound. We were gonna perform in a small Brazilian restaurant in North Dallas and I was late. I was coming from Forth Worth so all I had time to do was say hi to the guy at the door and join the rest of the band in preparing the last details. The whole band was dressing up so I came dressed as a shot up mobster. I put on a zoot suit and painted some bloody bullet holes in a white shirt.

The place started to fill up after we the music was on the way and at some point I spotted a HB7 (dressed as a cat) trying to mess with the strobe lights and move it to a different place but the spot she picked made it point right in our face so I signalled her to take it back. When our first break finally came I knew I had to act fast cause it was already 12:00 and I probably wasn’t gonna get another one until the end of the night. I intended to open some sets cause I still have approach anxiety and I wanted to get this ball rolling.

I moved to the front of the house and talked to the bouncer and the people at the door for a bit. I wanted to establish an image that this was my turf (it was only my second time there). Btw it’s a small restaurant so everyone could see me at the door.
I bump into dude#1 who recognizes me and starts talking to me and asking how I’m doing but I have no idea who this guy is.
I then headed back inside and spotted HBcat standing with a couple of friends. I head towards her:

CM8: (leaning in and standing in front of her) Do you work here?
HBcat: “uhhh…during the day” (her body language showing she’s uncomfortable)

I realize my mistake and immediately step to the side to be talking over the shoulder and leaning back in upright posture (the reason I leaned in was because she’s some 8in shorter than me)

CM8: Well it’s just that I saw you coming up and messing with the lights and stuff. Tell me something: Is the sound coming out loud enough here in the back? I heard from somebody that we could amp it up a bit.

She moved closer and stepped on my shoe (should’ve called her out on that)
HBcat: I guess you guys could but other than that you guys are awesome blah blah

I said something and rolled off. Thinking back I have no idea why I did that. The set was open and I just walked away. It was like being on stage for the first time I felt a little nervous. I didn’t introduce myself to the obstacles didn’t stay and build rapport. I just rolled off. Grrrr
I come up to some guy I know who’s dressed as a military guy (dude#2):

Dude#2: Hey man, you look like you got shot all over the place
CM8: yeah they got me really bad (playing along)
D#2: Come here let me introduce you to the nurse. (leads me to a HB8.5 dressed as nurse surrounded by 2 other people) Hey nurse, help my friend out he got shot.
CM8: (caught off guard and looking AFC) …………
(all could manage to say was a measly “yeah, I got shot”)
HBnurse: Poor thing (in a condescending tone)

My first shit test and I failed. The 2 other people started talking to each other and HBnurse and D#2 froze me out for a moment so I rolled off and immediately joined the rest of the band to restart the show. My second break came around 1:30. I approach a HB5 who’s dressed as a vampire. I know her from a church I used to go to and haven’t seen her in a long time. After some chatter I turn around for some reason and she grabs my hand to get my attention, asks me a question and doesn’t let go. I’m not attracted to her and don’t know how to react. I stay there letting her hold my hand for a sec and excuse myself. Should I game her just for practice??
I head outside where a friend of mine is smoking and talk to him for a little bit when HB8catwoman walks out. My friend says something to her in Spanish so I say hi to her in Spanish (I speak Portuguese which sounds like Spanish so they usually find it amusing that I can understand and half speak their language even though they can’t understand mine).

CM8: nice outfit
HBcatwoman: I got a whip (raising her whip in threatening motion and looking me in the eye)
CM8: wow, she’s dangerous (jumping half a step back)
Her boyfriend shows up from behind me and without saying a word grabs her hand and they leave.

After this I had to go back in to perform and put up all the sound equipment after the show. I then proceed to the afterparty. When I got there the first person I see is this HB9.5 whom I’ve known for some time. She gets up to greet me and I also say hi to her boyfriend who I’ve known for a long time but we’re not really close friends.
I walk into the house and see a couple of familiar faces but also a lot of people who came from some other party. One of them is a HB9 dressed as a ladybug who’s hanging out in a 5 set. Our eyes meet and we have a moment there for half a sec. I proceed to say hi to the owner of the house (who I know).
After a while they turn off the radio for me to play the guitar. Some of the girs start dancing (HB9.5 from outside plus HB8.5cop and HB6cop) while a bunch of people sing along. This goes on for a while and I feel like I DHV pretty good. This whole time i can tell HBladybug keeps looking at me.
While HBladybug is gone from her set I approach one of the guys in it and start talking. By the time she comes back I’m in full conversation with her friends and she just kind of stands there. Someone touches her little “antennas” which brings the attention to her.

CM8: What are you?
HBladybug: what do you mean?
CM8: What are you (circling my hand over my own head, making it clear I’m asking about the costume)
HBlb: I’m a ladybug
CM8: oh, your wings are missing
HBlb: yeah…I took them off. Hey, I know you.
CM8: me? Naahhh I think you’re mistaking me for someone else cause I don’t remember you ( I really didn’t)

She proceeds to describe my brother making me finally admit that she MUST know me. About 2 seconds before she tells me her name it hits me. I used to have this huuuuuge crush on this girl some 4 years ago. Think of the most AFC crush you ever had. The kind that makes you barely able to say anything intelligible. The kind that makes you tense up so much around her that she gets that weird vibe from you and starts to kind of avoid you. This realization brings back all my insecurities to me in that one moment but I hold them all back and don’t hesitate.

CM8: Naaah, I still don’t remember you
Her friend tries to help the situation (I remembered her friend)
Friend: She used to always hang around with me
CM8: I remember you but not her
HBlb: I had curly hair (her hair was now straight)
CM8: Ohhhhh…. Yeah… curly hair
HBlb: yeah
CM8: Naaahhh still don’t remember ahhahahahah

I finally make act out a face of recognition and tell her I know recognize her and we proceed to talk for a while but she leaves quickly. Apparently there’s some drama between her and Dude#1 (from the beginning of the story). I see them still talking outside 20 min later as I leave.

I go home with mixed feelings over whether the night was successful or not. I’d like to think it was. Being my first night out and all. The next day she sends me a friend request on myspace.

[Westfall]

It was successfull because you learned. I don't think you failed that shit test by telling her you got shot. When she didn't tend to your wounds, I'd bust on her for being a crapy nurse...who the hell leaves a gunshot victum unattended?

Did you notice how the girl who had previously had your affection tried to get it back. She has won you--she had rapport, but it was broken and she wanted to know she still could have you if she wanted. Once she did, she started to lose interest. IMO

WF

[Check_Mate]

It was successfull because you learned. I don't think you failed that shit test by telling her you got shot. When she didn't tend to your wounds, I'd bust on her for being a crapy nurse...who the hell leaves a gunshot victum unattended?

Did you notice how the girl who had previously had your affection tried to get it back. She has won you--she had rapport, but it was broken and she wanted to know she still could have you if she wanted. Once she did, she started to lose interest. IMO

WF

I see your point about the shit test. I just felt bad at the time cause I didn't have anything to say. Next time I'll be ready to turn that shit around on her.

As for HBladybug I think I'll have to break that comfort and neg her more so she can wonder what happened to that guy that used to kiss her ass all the time.
Since I didn't number close her I'll just forget about her for now. We're bound to meet again cause we have some mutual friends. I don't feel very good about trying to game her through myspace