Work game -- I need your help

[Guest]

for about the past month or so, I've noticed this really cute chick at work that I would love to get to know. Generally, I have a strict "don't date girls from work" policy, but we don't work in the same department (or floor) so I am very tempted to game her.

I have no idea where she works or what she does. The only time I ever see her is at lunch time. From my observation, she seems to be the quiet "girl next door" type. She appears to be shy and not talkative at all. She generally has lunch with two platonic coworkers (one male, one female). She's not flashy and wears very little makeup, if any. Her style is simple, yet stylish and sexy -- not extremely fashionable (meaning she doesn't wear expensive name brand clothing) from what I can tell. On a sclae of 1-10, most would consider her a 6.5 or 7; she's very cute and totally my type. She doesn't appear to be extremely confident and was more than likely not very popular in school.

I need an in.

I've thought about going direct and just saying hi, but I'm afraid she would be shocked that someone would just approach and say that she's cute. I'm guessing she doesn't get that often and wouldn't know how to handle it. It also makes it tough to approach as she is always having lunch with coworkers.

Now I could go indirect and strategically sit near her, ask for a napkin then possibly comment on what she's eating, wearing, etc..

Do you guys have any thoughts or suggestions?

Thanks in advance!

[Guest]

When you see her walking out the door for lunch say "I thought I was bad about going out to eat all the time! Can you recommend any interesting places? I find myself going to the same places every week"

[Guest]

Coming from me this may sound weird, but I think an old fashioned opinion opener would be a good icebreaker here. I think there was one about hair, you could prob use. Then lock in and just start vibing naturally. I love daygame. I guess the thing about it, and you may agree, is to go a little lighter on the cocky funny stff than would be good at the bar. You still want to neg a little - but just not the high energy type. Like you could use the fact that you don't usually date coworkers as a neg and build tension around that. Good luck bro.

[Guest]

I agree that you couldn't go wrong with an opinion opener. But with 6.5's and 7's you have to go light on the negging. Another thing I've noticed from hanging out with Budget Baller is that direct really is the best approach durring the day or in situations where it isn't the norm. Seriously dude has 1 line and 1 line only for girls with their group in daygame. "I think your friend is cute and wouldn't forgive myself if I didn't come over here and start a conversation with her. Guys is it ok with you if I meet your friend?" (addressing the whole group) I totally used to rag on him for the lack of style, but very rarely is this ineffective. It makes sense if you really think about it. Durring the night in bars and clubs you want to be different then all the liqured up aggressive cat-calling assholes that have hit her aka be indirect. The same could be said about daygame. Most guys are not bold enough to walk up to girl state their intent and be that confident. It's not my style to be that direct but I have seen it work over and over again for the only other buff asian on the board. And so far almost every time I've gotten out of my comfort zone and tried it the worst that has happened is that everyone in the group was impressed with the boldness I ended up up being very well recieved despite the girl having a bf or not being interested or whatever. PM him if you don't believe me.

[Guest]

You don't have to sell me on direct, I agree its good if done right, but not at work man. You have to be low key, for her sake if not yours.

[Guest]

Prodigy, now we're talking!

I have gamed so many girls from jobs I've had it's unbelievable. And it's so easy it's extra unbelievable.

Now, first off let's think about this: I am going to assume that most guys you work with are fat, unattractive, nerdy, beta, etc. You will stand out big time. That's a giant plus for you. Literally the only thing you have to do is talk to her. About anything. Stupid things. Make her laugh.

Now you [I]could[/I] go direct and it would probably be easy [I]but[/I] it [I]may[/I] not work in your favor. And could possibly be construed as sexual harassment. I doubt it, but you never know.

Just like someone else said I would ask her opinion about something or I would make a funny observation. I would not neg her, except to say you seem really shy - are you always so shy? Or are you some kind of crazy, adventurous, daredevil girl when you're not at work?

Literally you could just go up to her and say hi and it would still work. It won't be like an SNL at a bar, it will take a while for you two to build it up, but I will say some of the best, actually the very best, sex I have ever had was with girls I worked with (or worked in the same building with) and we built up the attraction over a bit of time.

So here is your process:

1) Talk to her, make her laugh.
2) See her another day, make her laugh again.
3) Start getting friendly with her, eat lunch with her, etc.
4) Escalate from there.
5) Unless she has a husband or some kind of committed relationship.

[Guest]

@ Grim - of course I meant be work apropriate, lol I just meant If you go ask her opinion on something in the lunch room it looks more like you were to shy to ask her what you really wanted to.

@ Lion - Wow bro I like your style. When I think back about the girls I've dated from work, that's pretty much exactly how it happened. of course this wasn't my strategy... just how things happened. It really makes sense to hear it mapped out like that.

[Guest]

Why not have fun with the barrier?
"I noticed you and I wanted to meet you, but I can't tell you that because we work in the same building... that would be bad. So let's just have lunch one of these days instead. You might make a nice friend... one of those cute friends I'm not allowed to flirt with."

[Guest]

My advice even though I gave it to Prodigy in person. Just in case it would help someone else.

While I was at lunch today I was thinking about average girl. Not the type of girl that goes to the bars every weekend getting hit on my a billion guys. The almost nerdy type of girl who is good looking in her own right, yet rarely views herself as such. I started thinking about this kind of girl since there is a girl who works there(place I eat lunch at every day) that is about a 6 and another girl studying for a college exam who was remotely decent looking.

I am going to throw your girl into the bunch with these two girls and tell you how I view them and how I think they view the world.

All of these girls would love to get hit on by the "right" guy. Think anything above a total reject here. These girls rarely make themselves available to the masses. They would love a guy to flatter them, yet they will rarely give you an opening. They are shy and coy. They are shy and coy to an extreme. Hence the reason they have rarely been hit on in their more adult life.

Given the 3 girls, lunch joint girl, studying girl, workplace girl I believe direct is not the best approach. I truly believe comfort game would work a hundred times better with these girls. Just a few minutes of comfort will go a long ways with these girls.

Now some things are in your favor. I usually say number close early but it is not needed and IMO not recommended for your situation. I would make yourself known just about every day to this girl. Strike up an innocent conversation tomorrow with her. The next day just say hello while making eye contact. The next day bust off a 30 second convo with her about whatever. Time is on your side here. At some point maybe a week or two into these innocent encounters you can bring things up a notch.

[Guest]

Not to beat a dead horse, but Lion and Playercool have it right.

First, this girl does not get hit on a lot and probably would love to have an attractive guy talk to them.

Secondly, she is not expecting to get hit on and doesn't have a lot of experience with it so going direct will more than likely give her the creeps.

Third, comfort, as always, is the name of the game here. But, it's not just comfort once it's comfort over a period of time. It's a slow play, one that builds up, which, as Lion alluded to, will build the sexual tension and tension is what really drives the quality of sex.

Fourth, you have to neg her a little. The neg sets you apart, the neg lets her know that you're flirting with her. If you don't neg, then you're just the nice guy that she sometimes talks to at the office. But, keep the neg calibrated and very, very soft. Lion's negs would be perfect.

Fifth, I would give her a nickname. Something stupid though and only after she's comfortable with you. If you tease her for being shy at work, but crazy after hours then call her trouble and stick to it. Actually, that's probably the only neg you'll need. Think how easy starting a conversation would be with her: "What's up Trouble? Good to see that you didn't get yourself arrested last night..."

Direct game works, although I think it lacks any level of imagination or creativity and, as such, is inherently boring. But, it does work. Here though, you cannot be direct it is simply inappropriate. What she needs is for you to start the conversation and escalate the interaction, she's probably not going to do any work so it's going to be up to you. The great thing about this situation is that if she's not interested, she'll more than likely have a friend that might be interested. So, it's very feasible to get hooked up with her friends. The absolute worst case scenario is that you make a friend that could introduce you to other people. The best case is a hummer Aerosmith style...