Down and out

[Guest]

This thread might have been brought up a bunch of times already. If so I apologize for recycling an unoriginal topic. I guess the specifics are not really that important so I'll leave them out, unless you're curious then I'd more than happy to share. For some reason I've found that as far as game is concerned immediately after I have peaks of success, I tend to have ridiculous crashes. This is very tough to avoid for a lot of reasons. I understand that success lends itself to more success. When you have women in your life you really are confident and more outcome independant. You really don't care if the women you approach reject you or not... you have women in your life already. In turn you do better and are more confident in set. Not to mention the whole pre-selection aspect of making you look like a confident guy. But on the flip side when you got nothing going well for you, all can muster the energy to portray is your lonliness and neediness. I don't understand why it's so hard for me to not base the the way I feel about myself on the success I am currently having or not having. This really should not affect my confidence the way it does. I mean I got into this for the same reasons that a lot of you did. Betterment of myself, lifestyle improvement etc. But lets be honest a measure of "success" is based on the approval of someone else. And it feels almost impossible at times to not let that affect you. How have some of you learned to shake it off and play like a champion again? Thanks for reading guys.

[Guest]

Do you know why you're being succesful with women? Is it all becasue of your lack of confidence in set? I find it hard to believe that that is the sole reason for you not being successful.

I would suggest taking a couple of weekends off (maybe even more, it all depends on you) to regroup, work on some inner game and hit the gym.

I say take some time off from sarging to let your mind rest. During this time, work on some small goals youve always wanted to accomplish. Read that really good book you've been meaning to, visit a place you've always wanted to see, etc. Accomplishing these goals will boost your confidence and the time off will hopefully reignite the fire and passion.

Hitting the gym will release chemicals that make you feel good and as you spend more time in the gym, you will see results that will help build your confidence.

Good luck man, we've all been through this...

[Guest]

The best remedy is to just put Game in the back of your head, go about your life, try to focus on things that you want to change or improve, and just sort of be. You'll find that when you're in situtations where you have an opportunity to Game that it'll sort of just happen naturally. In other words, you're pressing too much. Stop thinking about it, stop focusing on it, and don't make it a priority.

[Guest]

Take some time off. Doesn't need to be a ton but maybe 3 straight weeks without going out(Although ideally I would say go longer). I would even recommend taking time off from any fuck buddies as well. Don't go out on a date. Be celibate.

Now that you have removed yourself from the neediness of getting laid you will realize that you actually do have the willpower to do it. You realize that you are not driven by the need for sex and this will empower your thought process in regards to game. Neediness will undoubtedly remove itself from your mind. It is a truly great feeling.

Now when you go out for the evening I think you will approach it differently. While having certain motives will help, you won't be bound by the horrible feelings of not running flawless game. You will no longer be dependent on the outcome because you no longer need any result for you to be happy. No results are just fine. Crashing and burning is just fine. You have proven that you can be by yourself.

Everything that you wrote in your post can be achieved without having success with women. You can make your brain realize all of this and you will act as if you are the most successful guy in the world once you get your brain straight. Why not just get straight so you always think this way regardless of the women in your life. You will go through life acting as if you have more options than anyone even if you don't.

[Guest]

When I hit a slump, I like to reflect on my past successes and take time to remember all the wild and fun times. I base my success on how much fun I had, instead of how many girls I scored. When you are out having fun, girls tend to come a little easier and you won't be disappointed by your results. ;)

Everybody goes thru hi's and low's. Its part of life. Nobody stays at the top forever.

Its also a good time to pick up a new hobby or enrich your life in some form.

[Guest]

I'm at a point in my life right now where I have no time for game. I only have one night a week to go out, if at all. It's all for the better, because in the long run it will improve me as a person.

Before that, I had just gotten out of a LTR. It was a hard break up on me. After the break up, I was in your exact same boat. The high points in my life were really high, and the low points were really low, especially when it came to girls. Too much of my mood hinged upon success with women.

But when you're working toward a goal, though, and taking active steps to change your life for the better, you don't have time to worry about this sort of thing. Last week I blew off an of FB, and a potential hook-up from a girl I've been really attracted to for a long time.

I know things won't always be like this, and I look forward to the day when I can get back in the game much more fully (though that might take two years) but until then I'm happy to be achieving a life goal that's going to benefit me in the long run.