On internet dating profiles I see a lot of girls say:
-"I've never done this before so not sure"
-"Just checking this out"
-"My schedule doesn't allow me to meet guys by regular means"
-"A friend made me do this"
I tend to see it more with attractive girls than non-attractive. Is there something about a girl having to seek out the internet to find a guy that makes it taboo? Does this lower her self value in her own eyes?
Dallas PUA
The Pickup Artist Playground
Why is it?
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by Guest » Mon Apr 26, 2010 10:43 am
[QUOTE=UncleHOwie;35902]On internet dating profiles I see a lot of girls say:
-"I've never done this before so not sure"
-"Just checking this out"
-"My schedule doesn't allow me to meet guys by regular means"
-"A friend made me do this"
I tend to see it more with attractive girls than non-attractive. Is there something about a girl having to seek out the internet to find a guy that makes it taboo? Does this lower her self value in her own eyes?[/QUOTE]
In my experience, yes. Any time I ever pulled a chick off the net, I've found that the attractive women, although embarassed, ALWAYS ask why the net to meet a girl. I think it's because they're so accustomed to meeting people IRL and they think that it's weird to seek out a guy on the net. I also think it's because they want you to answer the question correctly. They want to know that you can get women IRL too.
While the less attractive women generally don't ever bring it up because this is usually the ONLY way they meet people so they think this is the way that most normal people meet people, and they're usually just happy to be out on a date with a guy.
I've found that the best way to play the whole, why the net question is to frame it as if it's just an additional venue you use to meet new people. I usually say something like, "I use the net from time to time but only think of it as another way to meet people that I may never run into in my normal, daily life."
I've found that when you talk about it like this, the attractive women tend to 'get that concept,' and immediately become more comfortable with you because they view you as being much more like them. Not some creepy Internet meme trolling around for chicks on the net.
-"I've never done this before so not sure"
-"Just checking this out"
-"My schedule doesn't allow me to meet guys by regular means"
-"A friend made me do this"
I tend to see it more with attractive girls than non-attractive. Is there something about a girl having to seek out the internet to find a guy that makes it taboo? Does this lower her self value in her own eyes?[/QUOTE]
In my experience, yes. Any time I ever pulled a chick off the net, I've found that the attractive women, although embarassed, ALWAYS ask why the net to meet a girl. I think it's because they're so accustomed to meeting people IRL and they think that it's weird to seek out a guy on the net. I also think it's because they want you to answer the question correctly. They want to know that you can get women IRL too.
While the less attractive women generally don't ever bring it up because this is usually the ONLY way they meet people so they think this is the way that most normal people meet people, and they're usually just happy to be out on a date with a guy.
I've found that the best way to play the whole, why the net question is to frame it as if it's just an additional venue you use to meet new people. I usually say something like, "I use the net from time to time but only think of it as another way to meet people that I may never run into in my normal, daily life."
I've found that when you talk about it like this, the attractive women tend to 'get that concept,' and immediately become more comfortable with you because they view you as being much more like them. Not some creepy Internet meme trolling around for chicks on the net.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Apr 26, 2010 11:13 am
There is a stigma attached to online dating. It is becoming less so these days, but the more attractive women still see it as a sign of failure. It's just another case of plausible deniability: they want to meet a guy, but they don't want to take responsibility for creating an online dating profile. They either half-ass it by writing very little about themselves or they claim someone else made them do it. I've seen women actually say that their friend wrote their profile for them. They try very hard to communicate that they're above it all. It's too bad, because it actually communicates insecurity. Many of those women spend all day browsing online dating sites.
The question of "why online dating?" does come up a lot. I like to say that I'm busy. I say, "there are plenty of way to meet people. I can go into a bar and throw a rock and hit a person, so that's one way to meet people... throw rocks at them." They usually laugh and agree. It's not that I can't meet a woman, it's that I'm SELECTIVE.
I wonder if there's a way to use this to our advantage. Maybe email her, "my friend made me email you." They make it so difficult. They don't invest anything into their profiles, so you have no reason to be interested in them besides their pictures. I've tried emailing them something like, "let's get this out of the way. I emailed you because of your pictures. However, I would like to know more about you than what you look like." This has not worked for me.
Have you had much success getting these types of women to offer anything?
The question of "why online dating?" does come up a lot. I like to say that I'm busy. I say, "there are plenty of way to meet people. I can go into a bar and throw a rock and hit a person, so that's one way to meet people... throw rocks at them." They usually laugh and agree. It's not that I can't meet a woman, it's that I'm SELECTIVE.
I wonder if there's a way to use this to our advantage. Maybe email her, "my friend made me email you." They make it so difficult. They don't invest anything into their profiles, so you have no reason to be interested in them besides their pictures. I've tried emailing them something like, "let's get this out of the way. I emailed you because of your pictures. However, I would like to know more about you than what you look like." This has not worked for me.
Have you had much success getting these types of women to offer anything?
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Apr 26, 2010 12:42 pm
[QUOTE=Rhody;35905]There is a stigma attached to online dating. It is becoming less so these days, but the more attractive women still see it as a sign of failure. It's just another case of plausible deniability: they want to meet a guy, but they don't want to take responsibility for creating an online dating profile. They either half-ass it by writing very little about themselves or they claim someone else made them do it. I've seen women actually say that their friend wrote their profile for them. They try very hard to communicate that they're above it all. It's too bad, because it actually communicates insecurity. Many of those women spend all day browsing online dating sites.
The question of "why online dating?" does come up a lot. I like to say that I'm busy. I say, "there are plenty of way to meet people. I can go into a bar and throw a rock and hit a person, so that's one way to meet people... throw rocks at them." They usually laugh and agree. It's not that I can't meet a woman, it's that I'm SELECTIVE.
I wonder if there's a way to use this to our advantage. Maybe email her, "my friend made me email you." They make it so difficult. They don't invest anything into their profiles, so you have no reason to be interested in them besides their pictures. I've tried emailing them something like, "let's get this out of the way. I emailed you because of your pictures. However, I would like to know more about you than what you look like." This has not worked for me.
Have you had much success getting these types of women to offer anything?[/QUOTE]
I agree with you 100%. And, yes, you can absolutely get attractive women to offer themselves to you off the Internet. It is harder and they do flake out a lot more, but it can be done. Sure, the odds of closing a 9 off the net are much lower than closing, say a 6 off the net. But, if you meet a 9 in a bar, or any where else for that matter, the odds of closing her are lower than closing a less attractive woman. That's just the nature of the beast.
The key is constructing the right kind of profile, if your profile is 'right' then you'll find that attractive women are much, much more open to talking with you. And, by 'right' I mean one that appears as if you didn't invest much in it. One that looks like it's off the cuff and doesn't contain a shit load of boring details about you and your life. They don't care about that shit. What they want to know is if you're funny, creative, intelligent, confident, attractive, and exciting...all of those dynamics can be created without disclosing [B][I][U]anything[/U][/I][/B] about yourself.
It's a fine line. You want it to have some meat to it, you want it to be thoughtful and clever, but you don't want to make it seem as if it took you 3 hours to put it together. The most attractive people on the net very obviously have profiles that took them 20 minutes, max. Download some pictures, write some meaningless dribble, answer some questions, and press submit...voila, they're done.
One of the most common mistakes I see is guys writing these clever emails and profiles that they put a lot of thought into only to wonder why no one responded. Well, would you respond to someone that spent 20 minutes crafting you the 'perfect' email? Would you respond to someone that wrote a freaking novel about their lives? No. Those people are losers.
It all comes down to the profile. Just like in real life, it's got to be somewhat indirect, somewhat brief (although I've had longer ones that worked well...they just have to seem short or low investment), a little indifferent, and have a small splash of peacocking (which can easily be done with your photos). The goal is to stick out from the crowd without appearing as if you're trying too hard. It's a lot like sarging in real life.
The question of "why online dating?" does come up a lot. I like to say that I'm busy. I say, "there are plenty of way to meet people. I can go into a bar and throw a rock and hit a person, so that's one way to meet people... throw rocks at them." They usually laugh and agree. It's not that I can't meet a woman, it's that I'm SELECTIVE.
I wonder if there's a way to use this to our advantage. Maybe email her, "my friend made me email you." They make it so difficult. They don't invest anything into their profiles, so you have no reason to be interested in them besides their pictures. I've tried emailing them something like, "let's get this out of the way. I emailed you because of your pictures. However, I would like to know more about you than what you look like." This has not worked for me.
Have you had much success getting these types of women to offer anything?[/QUOTE]
I agree with you 100%. And, yes, you can absolutely get attractive women to offer themselves to you off the Internet. It is harder and they do flake out a lot more, but it can be done. Sure, the odds of closing a 9 off the net are much lower than closing, say a 6 off the net. But, if you meet a 9 in a bar, or any where else for that matter, the odds of closing her are lower than closing a less attractive woman. That's just the nature of the beast.
The key is constructing the right kind of profile, if your profile is 'right' then you'll find that attractive women are much, much more open to talking with you. And, by 'right' I mean one that appears as if you didn't invest much in it. One that looks like it's off the cuff and doesn't contain a shit load of boring details about you and your life. They don't care about that shit. What they want to know is if you're funny, creative, intelligent, confident, attractive, and exciting...all of those dynamics can be created without disclosing [B][I][U]anything[/U][/I][/B] about yourself.
It's a fine line. You want it to have some meat to it, you want it to be thoughtful and clever, but you don't want to make it seem as if it took you 3 hours to put it together. The most attractive people on the net very obviously have profiles that took them 20 minutes, max. Download some pictures, write some meaningless dribble, answer some questions, and press submit...voila, they're done.
One of the most common mistakes I see is guys writing these clever emails and profiles that they put a lot of thought into only to wonder why no one responded. Well, would you respond to someone that spent 20 minutes crafting you the 'perfect' email? Would you respond to someone that wrote a freaking novel about their lives? No. Those people are losers.
It all comes down to the profile. Just like in real life, it's got to be somewhat indirect, somewhat brief (although I've had longer ones that worked well...they just have to seem short or low investment), a little indifferent, and have a small splash of peacocking (which can easily be done with your photos). The goal is to stick out from the crowd without appearing as if you're trying too hard. It's a lot like sarging in real life.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Apr 26, 2010 2:33 pm
These days I typically skip past the girls who don't put much effort into their profile. Lots of hot girls go thru their entire life not putting forth much effort.........because society allows it. I refuse to cater to them. I find those types lacking in many life skills that are crucial for a successful relationship.
If I do message a girl that has nothing in her profile I'll make fun of something in her pics. Sometimes they respond, sometimes not.
Just goes to show you how f'ing retarded women can be. They want to be more than a sex symbol but have no substance in their profile other than their pics?!?!?!? Then they say "I'm an open book, just ask whatever you want to know!" Puhleeze dumb bitch........If you were so open you'd provide some personal info on your profile.
If I do message a girl that has nothing in her profile I'll make fun of something in her pics. Sometimes they respond, sometimes not.
Just goes to show you how f'ing retarded women can be. They want to be more than a sex symbol but have no substance in their profile other than their pics?!?!?!? Then they say "I'm an open book, just ask whatever you want to know!" Puhleeze dumb bitch........If you were so open you'd provide some personal info on your profile.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Apr 26, 2010 2:41 pm
I made up a phony dating profile one time for a little experiment. I snatched some pics of a Brad Pitt looking guy knowing many women consider him attractive. Posted the pics and threw down a couple lame ass sentences to see if women would message me.
Hell no they didn't. I got less hits than my "real" profile. So for a guy it takes more than looks. You still need substance in your profile.
Hell no they didn't. I got less hits than my "real" profile. So for a guy it takes more than looks. You still need substance in your profile.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Apr 26, 2010 3:54 pm
Here is what I do:
I take about 5 minutes to craft a good opening message. Something I know girls will love to answer. I then go through profiles looking at pics, never reading what they write, and I shotgun the message out to every girl who I find attractive. This way I never get hung up on one girl and why didn't respond.
When they respond I read (skim) their profile. If they respond with a short sentence I don't bother responding back. If they cannot type (if they type lyk dis) I don't respond. I respond to girls who use capitalization and proper punctuation. That way I know that when I meet them they will be smarter and attractiver than average.
I never ask them about anything in their profile. I find out everything I want to know in our conversations. I keep it light and casual. I don't number close until we have set up a time to meet. When you number close an internet girl too early the fire dies. It's never the same texting her as it is messaging her on the original forum.
One piece of advice: any girl that refers to herself as "classy" is guaranteed to be a trashy whore.
I take about 5 minutes to craft a good opening message. Something I know girls will love to answer. I then go through profiles looking at pics, never reading what they write, and I shotgun the message out to every girl who I find attractive. This way I never get hung up on one girl and why didn't respond.
When they respond I read (skim) their profile. If they respond with a short sentence I don't bother responding back. If they cannot type (if they type lyk dis) I don't respond. I respond to girls who use capitalization and proper punctuation. That way I know that when I meet them they will be smarter and attractiver than average.
I never ask them about anything in their profile. I find out everything I want to know in our conversations. I keep it light and casual. I don't number close until we have set up a time to meet. When you number close an internet girl too early the fire dies. It's never the same texting her as it is messaging her on the original forum.
One piece of advice: any girl that refers to herself as "classy" is guaranteed to be a trashy whore.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Apr 26, 2010 4:33 pm
[QUOTE=Lion;35920]Here is what I do:
I take about 5 minutes to craft a good opening message. Something I know girls will love to answer. I then go through profiles looking at pics, never reading what they write, and I shotgun the message out to every girl who I find attractive. This way I never get hung up on one girl and why didn't respond.[/QUOTE]
I totally agree with that, but I also realize that it is the solution to, and cause of, the problems with online dating. A woman who is reasonably attractive doesn't have to do anything and every guy is emailing her. But your technique is what works. It's a numbers game with HUGE numbers.
[quote]When they respond I read (skim) their profile. If they respond with a short sentence I don't bother responding back. If they cannot type (if they type lyk dis) I don't respond. I respond to girls who use capitalization and proper punctuation. That way I know that when I meet them they will be smarter and attractiver than average.[/quote]
I once wrote an attractive woman a funny email that touched on some things in her profile, teased her a little, and then asked her a qualifying question about herself. It was great if I do say so myself. She responded with, "hahaha, you made me laugh keep it up." Wow! That's all she has to offer me? I responded, "awesome." No capitalization, no punctuation, just "awesome." Of course, that was it. But I'm not going to give 99% to her 1%. I could have called her out on it and pulled some more effort out of her, but it would only be based on her having some hot pictures.
[quote]I never ask them about anything in their profile. I find out everything I want to know in our conversations. I keep it light and casual. I don't number close until we have set up a time to meet. When you number close an internet girl too early the fire dies. It's never the same texting her as it is messaging her on the original forum.[/quote]
My approach is different. I try to get the phone number. I want to hear her voice, and I tell her that. I want to hear if she has a pleasant voice and a cute laugh. That's important to me. Once I get her on the phone, I can show my personality better. I find that makes it easier to set up the meet.
On the other hand, I know your way works too. I know other guys who do it that way.
I take about 5 minutes to craft a good opening message. Something I know girls will love to answer. I then go through profiles looking at pics, never reading what they write, and I shotgun the message out to every girl who I find attractive. This way I never get hung up on one girl and why didn't respond.[/QUOTE]
I totally agree with that, but I also realize that it is the solution to, and cause of, the problems with online dating. A woman who is reasonably attractive doesn't have to do anything and every guy is emailing her. But your technique is what works. It's a numbers game with HUGE numbers.
[quote]When they respond I read (skim) their profile. If they respond with a short sentence I don't bother responding back. If they cannot type (if they type lyk dis) I don't respond. I respond to girls who use capitalization and proper punctuation. That way I know that when I meet them they will be smarter and attractiver than average.[/quote]
I once wrote an attractive woman a funny email that touched on some things in her profile, teased her a little, and then asked her a qualifying question about herself. It was great if I do say so myself. She responded with, "hahaha, you made me laugh keep it up." Wow! That's all she has to offer me? I responded, "awesome." No capitalization, no punctuation, just "awesome." Of course, that was it. But I'm not going to give 99% to her 1%. I could have called her out on it and pulled some more effort out of her, but it would only be based on her having some hot pictures.
[quote]I never ask them about anything in their profile. I find out everything I want to know in our conversations. I keep it light and casual. I don't number close until we have set up a time to meet. When you number close an internet girl too early the fire dies. It's never the same texting her as it is messaging her on the original forum.[/quote]
My approach is different. I try to get the phone number. I want to hear her voice, and I tell her that. I want to hear if she has a pleasant voice and a cute laugh. That's important to me. Once I get her on the phone, I can show my personality better. I find that makes it easier to set up the meet.
On the other hand, I know your way works too. I know other guys who do it that way.
- Guest
by Guest » Tue Apr 27, 2010 8:53 am
[QUOTE=Rhody;35923]My approach is different. I try to get the phone number. I want to hear her voice, and I tell her that. I want to hear if she has a pleasant voice and a cute laugh. That's important to me. Once I get her on the phone, I can show my personality better. I find that makes it easier to set up the meet.
On the other hand, I know your way works too. I know other guys who do it that way.[/QUOTE]
I've done both methods and they both work, it just depends on what you're looking for on the first meet up. I would never get into the multiple call and text scenario, never. Personally, I prefer to shoot one text (with my number in it) and give her one call before meeting up. I've found that it builds a lot of comfort and makes it easier to fuck close her on the initial meeting or on the second meeting. And, the phone call gives me one out before I actually meet her.
On the other hand, I know your way works too. I know other guys who do it that way.[/QUOTE]
I've done both methods and they both work, it just depends on what you're looking for on the first meet up. I would never get into the multiple call and text scenario, never. Personally, I prefer to shoot one text (with my number in it) and give her one call before meeting up. I've found that it builds a lot of comfort and makes it easier to fuck close her on the initial meeting or on the second meeting. And, the phone call gives me one out before I actually meet her.
- Guest
by Guest » Tue Apr 27, 2010 8:54 am
[QUOTE=UncleHOwie;35914]I made up a phony dating profile one time for a little experiment. I snatched some pics of a Brad Pitt looking guy knowing many women consider him attractive. Posted the pics and threw down a couple lame ass sentences to see if women would message me.
Hell no they didn't. I got less hits than my "real" profile. So for a guy it takes more than looks. You still need substance in your profile.[/QUOTE]
That's right, your profile has to have 'teeth' to it otherwise they'll just move on to the next one.
Hell no they didn't. I got less hits than my "real" profile. So for a guy it takes more than looks. You still need substance in your profile.[/QUOTE]
That's right, your profile has to have 'teeth' to it otherwise they'll just move on to the next one.
- Guest
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