i can't believe it

[Guest]

Hey guys! Long time no see!

Today a freaking HUGE turning point happened in my game! Here's the story:

I was walking the halls of quad c and i see walking towards me none other than my oneitis! This girl was my only girlfriend and she broke my heart and as a result i fucked my whole life over completely till i found the wonderful community :)

Now it has always been a secondary goal for me to reconcile with her and for us to get on good terms again and at least not hate each other. every time i would ask her to meet me so i could accomplish that goal she said Something along the lines of "there's no way in hell". but today after seeing her i texted her and we texted back and forth and i asked if she could meet me for lunch(i made sure to say just as friends lol) and she agreed!

fast forward to lunch: we're sitting there talking about our past and all that has happened since we dated and i am being truthful about everything, i lied out my Ass while dating her, and i tell her that i met a gr

[Guest]

group of guys who are really good with women and they encouraged me to start to improve my life and be a better man. she was eating all this up

When she told me of what she's been through she talked about ex boyfriends and how she didn't want to have sex with them/how horrible they were. her and i never had sex, BUT she was the first girl i saw naked and i was the first guy. she gave me oral on several occasions and we dry humped a lot. in hindsight she wanted me bad! guess that puts me a bar over all those boyfriends she didn't want to have sex with :)

i social proofed myself by telling her i have a girlfriend, which is halfway true. she said she is single :)

as far as iois go she was smiling a lot, she opened up to me about her past and she laughed at most of my jokes.

anyways after our meetup i texted her saying we should get together again sometime and she said that sounds cool :)

now it sounds to me that she would be down to fuck if i was, or maybe give her and i a round 2? from the information i gave you guys can you see either of those conclusions?

[Guest]

Coming from someone who has experienced what you've described, I say that you should just forget about the girl and move on, much harder said than done.

I am one that doesn't believe being friends with exes are possible; there are usually some lingering feelings that will cause complications in the "platonic" freindship.

Maybe with some game, you might be able to fuck her, but I say there are plenty of other girls out there that you can try to fuck.

Some guys would advise that you game her, fuck her and never call her again; basically break her heart as she did to you. I advise agianst this. Why do that?be more mature and a better man than that. Having that hateful mentality towards women is not healthy.

Enjoy the good chat you had, but I truly believe it's best to move on and never contact her again.

[Guest]

Also, you sound like you still have feelings for her, do you really believe you can be just friends? I would bet my money on it that you can't.

Hopefully you have gained much knowledge and confidence from the game. Hopefully you are a better man now then when you were while dating her. And I hope you are still on the journey to improve yourself...

Look at what she's done to you, do you think you deserve that type of treatment from her (or any woman)? Do you really want to go through that again? I say you deserve better and you should move on neverlook back...

[Guest]

No I don't gather those same conclusions. She was probably more interested in maintaining some level of "friendship" more than anything.

However, it seems that you are very hopeful about some sort of realtionship developing at some point.

I imagine time has helped heel some emotional wounds on her part and that is why she finally agreed to see you. Agreeing to see you doesn't exactly mean she wants a sexual relationship with you.

Stuff like this can get very messy when the direction, needs, and wants are not clearly defined between the two partners. If you want to go down that path then you need to have that conversation with her. No need to waste your time or hers nor have somebodys feelings get hurt.

If its just sex you want then find it somewhere else. Sex brings out a whole new dimension for girls.

A good way to tell if she really wants something with you is to let her actions do the talking! You've told her you are interested in meeting her now, let her make the next move. If she is as interested as you are, she'll contact you and let you know she wants to see you again!

Congrats for achieving your secondary goal, but I'd keep working towards your primary goal of improving your life and being a better man.....while seeing other girls. You learn a lot about what you want and don't want from a woman by being around different girls.

I went thru a similar deal with my exwife......and am currently going thru a similar deal with an exgirlfriend! lol, for some reason I always stay friends with my ex's. Its got its pro & cons. But just be up front & sincere with your intentions.

[Guest]

Well fuck. I really just want to be friends with her lol. Has anyone been able to pull off a friendship with an ex gf?

[Guest]

I suggest this topic be moved to the lounge!

UL- what kind of friendship are you referring to? one with little commitment and some hot sex?

[Guest]

what kind of friendship? just a friendship. no sex required. would i still bang her? yes. do i still want a relationship with her? FUCK NO. We didn't work out then and we will never work out romantically.

just want to be friends. maybe, she could be a wingwoman lol

[Guest]

I am still friends with 1 exwife, 2 ex girlfriends, and 2 girls I dated within the past 2years so yes it can be done. It definitely takes a certain personality type.

Some steps/tips for pulling this off:

1. When you decide to end the relationship, don't blow up at them. Don't walk away mad. Talk over the reasons it didn't work and leave them with some dignity. Let them know they were important to you and still are. I've been known to write a sincere note about what they meant to me.

2. Give them some distance before you try and start a friendship. Time heals a lot of pain.

3. You can't be the jealous type.

4. Be accepting of their new boyfriends, don't be judgemental.

5. Don't hound her where she's at or who she's with when she's not with you. She doesn't report to you anymore.

6. Don't confuse your new role as "friend" with "boyfriend".

7. Treat it much like you would a friendship with one of your male friends.(as long as you aren't bi! lol j/k)

8. If there is something you do or quality about you that helps you stand out from the rest then capitalize on it. For instance, if you were some super stud in bed, then work that to your advantage in this new friendship. Maybe you know how to fix cars. Offer to put brakes on her car sometime.

9. Be easy to talk to and let her know that you are someone she can confide in that totally understands her.

10. Talk about the fun things in your past that you both enjoyed as a couple. It helps paint a positive picture of the good times and why she was drawn to you.

[Guest]

Great tips UH.

I would like to think that the dumper should Be the one extending the friendship. If the dumpee does it, it seems like they're trying to chase still, even if you say that you don't want anything more than just friends.