advice? stuck... HB nurse

[Guest]

Hey guys~

I met a cute nurse last friday when I went in to get a flu shot and I thought she was cute so I came back to see her with a friend so that he could get a flu shot (by another nurse) and the cute nurse came back out to flirt with me a little. We joked about where we could get the shot administered (i.e. shoulder, thigh, or butt because she said it was a "muscle" shot) I didn't pull for a number close because I wanted to be discrete since she was with her nursing staff and possibly human resources. I got her name and emailed her for her phone number that afternoon and on Saturday around midnight she replied back saying she was working a late shift and gave me her #.

The email I sent her friday afternoon:

SUBJECT: shoulder shot guy

Body:

HB's name,

Can I have your # in case I have more questions about my shot? =)

*********************

The email she sent me saturday late night:

Really?! Well I guess I should follow through to make sure your alright. XXX-XXXXXXX. Hope you had fun dancing. I am working. YEAH


########################################

So I figure she's probably gonna sleep in and proceed to call her around 7pm sunday night but she didnt' answer so I left her a text message poking fun at her ringtone:
"Hi HB, this is the shoulder shot guy. I thought I was dialing a restaurant when I heard the music play. :) "

She replied back 2 hours later with:

"So how's the shoulder?"

I replied back with: "It might need some attention. Are you working?"

"lol. Worked last night. Kinda sleeping. Just being really lazy. First Sun off in wks."

"Hope I didn't wake you up earlier =). YOu work some crazy hours!"

"No. I normally work nights. 7p-7a. Tomorrow I'm gonna start doing home health. So gotta be there at 9AM. UGH!"

"What did you do on your day off? 9am is not bad at all. You sound like a night owl."

"when working nights I am. I usually stay up til 3am at least . I have a hard time getting to bed before 12am. I don't have to be back at the hospital until wednesday so working some int he days and having some drinks with friends. =) "

"haha are you drinking right now?"

"no silly. I've decided to finally get up and eat though. Starving!"



"You didn't pick up! Bad nurse! lol"



"How's work going? Sorry didn't pick up the phone the ringer was off"

lol - lame excuse

"Work's great. And no worries..I knew that cute smile was too good to be true."

"What's that mean?"

now it's my turn to reply but not sure how to approach this...I know I was AFC for most of this..but do you guys have any advice on how I should reply?

Thanks!

[Guest]

Ahh nurses...I have definitely had my fair share of them.

Most are slutty whores but on occasion some are goody tooshoes and boring. The latter being extremely rare.

Nurses work crazy hours and if they are not working there is a good chance they are sleeping. They most likely work 4 on 3 off then 3 on 4 off. So realize straight away you will have to work around their schedules. They are also offered tons of overtime, some take it, some don't. This can also throw you for a loop. Most of these nurses have pretty stressful work loads so when they are off they like to relax and then party.

At this point you should drop the calling. There is just too high of a chance you are going to keep getting the VM. They are working or sleeping neither of which is going to elicit an answer. Stick with only texting her for now on as she has been very receptive of that.

How to reply? Well for one just drop that thread completely. Make her wonder what you meant...hell I am trying to figure it out too. It lends some mystery to your otherwise mundane conversation.

Whenever you feel like texting her back just start on some other topic. Also be ready for her to ask you about the smile comment again.

Take this bored nurse into la la land and it looks like you might be golden.

Goodluck

[Guest]

Nice close on this one.

Drop the current thread and open her back up with something different in a day or so. Try to stay away from things like what are you doing, are do anything fun this weekend, how's your week, etc.

Just make a statement or crack a joke. She'll respond and then go from there.

Secondly, stop calling her. I've never been a fan of calling a chick, unless it's to set up an SNL or something because she didn't want her friends to know.

And, PC's right, be ready to have an answer for that last comment of yours. I'm not sure any one knows what that means...

[Guest]

But you can be assured I never made any call after that 2nd one. =)

I texted her back last night with>> " hello miss *her last name*. how's my bratty little nurse doing? :) "

HER>> "what r up up to? Do you work tomorrow?"

ME>> " i just left the gym and i got hit on by a guy there! It's the price you pay for not having to wait on equipment lol. "

HER>> " Wow. Didn't know u went that way. Kinda late to be leaving the gym. he probably thought u wanted another kinda of workout ;) "

ME>> " You're a BAD girl. LOL. I've been working out at this time lately. So when I call the next time, are you gonna answer? I can't believe I even have to ask... :) "

HER>> " Depends on when you call, right now laying in bed about 2 fall asleep. Had long day. Not use to that"

ME>> " Not use to long days? I figured nurse schedules were pretty crazy for the most part. Thanksgiving is around the corner..are you celebrating?"

HER>> " Working the hospital. I'm used to long nights"

ME>> " Get some rest. Sweet dreams. :) "

HER>> " ur so sweet :* U too"



HAHAH today is a new day..so who knows where to take it from here...i hate texting with chicks unless i'm already dating them. I need to get this gal on the phone so I can set up a date.

[Guest]

[QUOTE=budgetballer;33779]

HAHAH today is a new day..so who knows where to take it from here...i hate texting with chicks unless i'm already dating them. I need to get this gal on the phone so I can set up a date.[/QUOTE]

No you don't.

Just set the date up over text.

I will reiterate don't call this girl.

She doesn't want you to. She likes text. It has nothing to do with you it has everything to do with her comfort zone. Nowadays it is just common place to set everything up over text. Once you have some value you can do things via phone calls but for now with this girl stick with text.

[Guest]

In the world we live in there isn't a reason to call a girl. Unless she has specified she likes phonecalls and/or she calls you. Most girls hate phonecalls unless she knows you very well. In the last decade I've called one girl to set up a first date. And that was 2002. Before texting was the rage.

[Guest]

I guess I've just been in the routine of calling girls and talking to them in the past. And I guess the game has changed in this context. I will keep what you guys say in mind.


So I'm at the point, then, where I should just be teasing her and going to set up the date? I just find it hard to build comfort over text vs a real voice and conversation...

[Guest]

[QUOTE=budgetballer;33783]I guess I've just been in the routine of calling girls and talking to them in the past. And I guess the game has changed in this context. I will keep what you guys say in mind.


So I'm at the point, then, where I should just be teasing her and going to set up the date? I just find it hard to build comfort over text vs a real voice and conversation...[/QUOTE]



Well dude, you've built enough comfort with her to get her number and for her to actually engage you in a text thread. So, I don't think you need to create any more comfort.

This is something that has always worked for me and it's pretty simple:

budgetballer: "I'm free Wednesday night, let's grab an adult beverage."

Direct. Concise. Clear. It's a statement, not a REQUEST. That's really important. Women want to please men, so put her in a position where she can make you happy by meeting you out.

There are usually three responses to this:

1) What did you have in mind? Or, yes what time and where?
2) She can't but offers an alternative time/night.
3) She can't but offers no alternative OR she doesn't respond

Obviously, scenario 1 means you're in. So, have something in mind (i.e. venue and time) before you ask. Scenario 2 means you're in as well, but she is legitimately busy that night. She's a nurse, so I would just take her up on what ever she counters with. Scenario 3 means the thread is dead. If she wanted to meet up with you she would have said yes or offered an alternative. In this case, next her.

As far as calling her, DON'T!!! Lion's right, there really is no legit reason to ever call a girl in today's society. You need to learn to be comfortable with and dangerous via text.

[Guest]

[QUOTE=budgetballer;33783]I guess I've just been in the routine of calling girls and talking to them in the past. And I guess the game has changed in this context. I will keep what you guys say in mind.


So I'm at the point, then, where I should just be teasing her and going to set up the date? I just find it hard to build comfort over text vs a real voice and conversation...[/QUOTE]

True comfort is hard to build over text. That is why it should just be sorta fun conversation. Just as you are not going to really get to know her over text the same is true on her end. She is just not going to really feel comfortable with you just from a few lines of text. That is what the date is for. The trick is how do you segway from conversation via text into a date. It is actually quite simple. If she over the course of your initial interaction and that of your text she feels comfortable with you and deem you as worthy of her time she will agree to a date. This girl over text was interested in what you were doing. That tells me she is more than likely interested in seeing you again in a normal setting outside of the workplace. It is just a matter of you getting her to meet up with you somewhere so true comfort can begin.

Reading your conversation she was a little thrown back by your initial contact with her via email. She knew you really didn't want her number for post op and she didn't like that you were beating around the bush. So IMO you should go a little more direct when you ask her out. It doesn't have to be over the top or anything just make your intent known.

[Guest]

Man I feel old but now enlightened thanks to your guys info... You'all make it sound so simple.

Playercool, I will work on true comfort in person with her. If things are going well, should I go ahead and make plans for a 2nd date on the spot or wait until later and do it? (via text of course)


BullRun, thanks for breaking it down. I'm gonna borrow your line and execute. My only problem is that today is my last free day in town. I won't be back until Sunday evening for the holiday break. Is it too late notice to have her meet tonight and is it too late to wait until Sunday? lol I know I'm overanalyzing but I can't help but be detail-oriented. I take this seriously. :D