Online Girl can't meetup till she is "comfortable" in her school

[Guest]

Ok so last week I was gaming this chick(hb9 easily) via myspace chat. Got her attracted and was going to go for the number close BUT she said she broke her phone by talking on it in the shower(wtf????).

So I just decided to continue talking to her on myspace chat. This went on every night for like 4 days. On the 3rd day I said "Hey hb9! We should hang out sometime! We could go to the mall and you could help me pick out something to wear for my brothers birthday party!"

She informed me that she would love too(SCORE!) but she would be incredibly busy the next week(the current week) getting ready for school(hers starts monday, mine the 24th).

This was a punch in the dick. I can't text her/call her AND I cannot meet up with her till she starts school! DAMN YOU HB9!

On the fourth day we talk on myspace chat and she says "Yeah so I am crying because I have to delete my myspace"
Oh damn. Game over.
I try to make her laugh and shit because I hate sad people. I make her laugh and she is all like "I love you. You're awesome. You're so cool and funny UL."
IOI? Yes please.

So I say "Hey is there any way I can contact you after you delete your myspace? You're cool and I would like to continue talking to you."

She says "Well I get my phone on Monday(and keep in mind this convo happened last Thursday night) and I won't have unlimited call but will have unlimited text. Give me your number and I will text you when I get my phone. It will be Mon. or Tue."

I give her my number and we say our goodbyes and it becomes a waiting game. At this point I am going to be really surprised if she texts me because she is a hb9 and can have any guy she wants and doesn't need to meet them off the net by any means.

Monday comes around. No text. Tuesday comes around. No text. I feel pretty bad because she was a really cool girl(gf material).

So Wednesday comes around and I get a text "UL!!! I FINALLY GOT MY PHONE!!!" I am really happy. This hb9 remembered to text me after waiting for FIVE days to get her phone. SHE remembered ME! Woop!!! This is a big deal in my eyes. So we text a little and then I ask when we can meet in person. She says "Blah blah not till I get comfortable in school".

Later I realise my best friend is actually going to her school and he is commuting(her school is an hour away!) and I ask him if he could drive me out there so I could see her one day as I do not rely on my car to make it that far. He says yes! So I text her the good news. She says "Well let me get situated than we will see."

We texted some more last night and this morning. This morning I felt attraction slipping away as the texting got kind of boring. I know it is important in Online Game to get the meetup ASAP and not to drag it on and make her put it into the "fantasy relationship/guy she talks to to make herself feel good but will never actually meet" category, but she is talking about waiting till she gets comfortable at school! That could be another week!

My questions are twofold:
1. Do you think the remembering me for five days thing is a big deal?

2. How do I keep a chick I have never met interested for another week till she gets comfortable with school?

[Guest]

This is a tricky one. My gut is telling me to not hold your breath, she will keep coming up with lame excuses....but my gut is also very hungry. They could somehow be legitimate excuses. Keep doing what you're doing with the texting and if she gives you that bullcorn 5 days from now next her and forget about it.

[Guest]

I think the part about texting her that you're gonna go up to her school to meet her is kinda creepy.

I'd keep it going for a while. No harm in it...it's not like it cuts in to your time much.

[Guest]

Next.......

[Guest]

When she says "I would love to, but..." it does not actually mean she would love to. It means she feels like she should be polite. If she wanted to see you she would make a counter-suggestion, or she would at least be more specific about why she can't.

It seems to me her excuses are getting more and more lame. Seems she's trying to blow you off and you're not letting her, which in this case I would say is good.

By "getting situated" I think she may be (unconsciously) referring to her social situation. She doesn't have a pack of friends who can gang up on an individual guy, and she may be waiting for that safety before she agrees to string you along more seriously.

I'm hypothesizing here, that this is the problem and the cause for the lame excuses.

Frame her as independent and mature. Praise her for bravely making independent choices on her own. Tell her the thing you like about her is how she is grown up and taking control of her own destiny rather than letting circumstances blow her around. Try to elicit something specific first! It doesn't have to be major but it has to be specific. So if she asks why you think that she's independent, you're not stuck saying ummm.. because...

Everyone has those pieces in their personality, no matter how small, and by focusing awareness on it and praising her for it, it grows. That increases the chances she'll act more independently and be brave enough to meet you without her pack.

[Guest]

THIS JUST IN: She says daddy never bought her a phone, and she has been using her best friends phone. IMO the fact that she borrowed a persons phone just to contact me is another BIG IOI. She says her dad will not buy her a phone, but she is making another myspace, and I have her email address just in case.

I asked for her email, and she willingly gave it to me it seems. Does this go against what Vector is saying in any small way?

Also, she left to do something but told me I could text her friend, so I was texting her friend and her friend was like "yeah she said she DESPERATELY needed to use my phone so I let her". Now idk about you guys but I do not carry around a list of everyone I knows phone numbers so I can text them on my friends phone, and would not if I was in her sit., AND I defenately would not be desperate to text any of my friends. So another IOI?

Finesse if at all possible I would like to not next her. She seems like a really cool chick.

And, Vector, when I asked for the meetup at her school, I said "yeah I should come when you are comfortable with your school and all moved in and stuff. I do not want to mess up your schooling". Maybe that was AFC, but I don't want to get in the way of her education.

[Guest]

And I just realized I made myself look stupid by the title of this post. Made it seem like it was her idea for being comfortable in her school. Fuck. Sorry guys.

Another question I have though, is there any way I can PUSH for the meetup to be sooner, without giving an ultimatum? I do not really like ultimatums very much.

[Guest]

I bet this girl is 18.

Yes it is a good sign she saved your number and texted you.

The telling her you would ride with your friend an hour away to come say hello does seem to be on the creepy side just a little. But an 18 yo girl probably likes it.

Anyways I would remove myself from thinking/wanting to text her so much. Let it go a day or 3 before you text(or in this case email) her. It is very odd she is using a friends phone. I would probably just wait for her to contact you via text before you text some random persons phone.

Just give it time...see how it plays out over the next few weeks. Things will probably go south but you never know. This girl might not hit it off and make very many friends right away. If that is the case you will probably get your rocks off with her. If she is truely a 9 I would say this will probably not happen though as she will naturally be getting shit loads of attention.

[Guest]

i'd dial back on pushing for a meetup after the other texts, and the thing about driving an hour to see her to say hi (not a good frame no matter how you think it was positioned).

let her get settled..
let her get her new myspace...
don't be searching for her profile every day and the minute it pops up send an add request. In fact do not add her. You have her email. just exchange emails and let her re-add you.

i'd give it a day or 2 as well, and re-open with a money opening text.

[Guest]

Ok guy, this girl is a flake. Let her go. $100 says it is her phone and she made up the friend bit. Every hot girls dad will buy her a phone.

Stop texting her asap. Let it go for a few days. If she texts you, great. Wait half an hour before you reply.

For future reference instead of saying "I convinced my friend to drive me up there to see you"

Say "Hey, looks like I'll be in your neck of the woods on so and so day for a friends whatever. If I'm not too busy I'll call you and we can blah blah whatever."