How to know you left a set unfinished.

[Guest]

I recently had this happen.


So I am helping a friend of mine after his breakup with his faience, and am working sets to get over his fear of rejection. Hell I even used his situation as a combination DHV and opener.

Through a >6set I am talking to this one hb7 and it's going well, I attempt to NC, running though setting up a proposed meet but get stopped with a "I don't think my boyfriend would like that" at the number attempt, so I backtracked with "Whoa hold on now, that's a little too fast for me..I hardly know you, I am looking for a friend *Wink*", and then proceeded to pawn her to get an introduction to another girl at the table to her immediate left sitting down, well turns out it was her sister, I ask her a few qualification questions she she eagerly answers and leans down to get her to introduce herself to me, she does so very enthusiastically we talk, kino, the works, I build comfort, and then number close with good feelings all around. I close with im back off to my friends and then if I see her before either of us leaves I'll say bye. I feel this adds a final physical connection with the ones who find me to say bye since they sought me out and wanted that goodbye hug.

This one found me and hugged me full on tight full tits hug, and then grabbed me on the arm and squeezed and said "You are going to call, Right?"


This was either a very successful number close, or a unfinished set where attraction was built but the time constraint was set too short?

Or does this sound like a decent execution but something was skipped?


I need some insight. Thanks in advance.

-DJ

[Guest]

Doesn't seem like anything wrong to me. Do you not want to call the one whose number you got? Or if she flakes, then something may have been wrong, but so far it all seems ok.

[Guest]

I did call, and did a change of venue, that was set up and done, however I got busy and was unable to meet up. I've left it at that untill now because of finals in college. I will try to re-establish contact this next week with "asking her understanding that school comes first as my career start is so close" DHV. She stated she had to work, but would make time.

I must say I kinda feel bad about that, this was about two weeks ago. Any suggestions how to fix my little screwup?

Sorry should have added this, my mistake typing between breaks at work.


What do you think?

[Guest]

Go AFC.

Tell her you were super busy with School and work but really want to see her.

This will make her feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

[Guest]

I don't think the "asking her understanding that school comes first as my career start is so close" is a DHV in this situation.

The reason is because if you tell her that you have just acknowledged that you did something wrong by being too busy and consumed with your life's pursuits to fit her in.

The point is that you did nothing wrong. Sure, you may have stated that you wanted to hang out, but sometimes life gets in the way. She should understand that.

Further, you just met this girl. You owe her nothing. It's still very casual. Don't set the apologetic frame, it subcommunicates weakness.

In my opinion, you should just pick up exactly where you left off. Pick a topic from your conversation or a running joke you might have with her or something that bridges back to the times you've spoken and then use that to hook her back.

I once used the "What would you rather have as a pet, a dinosaur or a monkey?" opener on a chick (I always say monkey because virtually everyone else says dinosaur). Then, I number closed her, we texted back and forth for a while then the thread died. Then, the story of that lady getting mauled by a monkey hit the world. I immediately texted her:

BR: "Guess you were right..."
HB: "Huh?"
BR: "About having a pet dinosaur instead of a monkey..."

Hooked. Time bridge my friend, time bridge.

[Guest]

I see a pursuit of higher education and a career higher value then a lot of people who can dress up and offer nothing. But I understand the flip side as well.

I used a fragrance opener on her so I guess I can complete that as I asked her opinion on a future purchase. That would be the time bridge.


This is good advice, this is a decent place.

[Guest]

I agree with BR. This is not really about whether school and career is or is not high value. It's more about not apologizing.

There are times to apologize and times not to. Don't apologize for being in school. Don't apologize for putting school first. That's like apologizing for being who you are or for breathing air. Asking for understanding basically says there can be more than one interpretation as to whether it's right for you to be doing what you're doing. And you hope her interpretation is the same as yours. This undermines confidence, and the value of an education and a career (in terms of attractiveness to women) is sadly less important than confidence.

[Guest]

[quote1242420566=djandarial]I see a pursuit of higher education and a career higher value then a lot of people who can dress up and offer nothing.[/quote1242420566]

I can see how one would think of that as a DHV, but I just don't think it really is when you're having a fun, light conversation with someone.

It's an even more powerful DHV when you're subtle and humble about your education.

I'm a highly educated person as well, but my girls don't ever find out about that until relatively deep into our relationship. Many never knew.

It's interesting, but I've discovered that if you sound intelligent and speak eloquently that people just assume that you're smart and accomplished. As such, it seems redundant and makes you sound like a braggart to openly offer your accomplishments to a woman. I don't think the education is the DHV as much as what you need in order to achieve the education.

[Guest]

[quote1242428975=Bull Run]
[quote1242420566=djandarial]I see a pursuit of higher education and a career higher value then a lot of people who can dress up and offer nothing.[/quote1242420566]

I can see how one would think of that as a DHV, but I just don't think it really is when you're having a fun, light conversation with someone.

It's an even more powerful DHV when you're subtle and humble about your education.

I'm a highly educated person as well, but my girls don't ever find out about that until relatively deep into our relationship. Many never knew.

It's interesting, but I've discovered that if you sound intelligent and speak eloquently that people just assume that you're smart and accomplished. As such, it seems redundant and makes you sound like a braggart to openly offer your accomplishments to a woman. I don't think the education is the DHV as much as what you need in order to achieve the education.
[/quote1242428975]

Bingo. No need to brag, it shows itself.

[Guest]

Gotcha, I don;t understand why more people are not active in this board... Good Help as well as clarification on simple matters such as this.


Thank you all for your assistance.