Lately, I’ve worked with or simply had discussions with quite a few of you in this community about your issues with approaching and keeping a set warm enough to progress through. I’m the kind of guy who likes to simplify things. I look for broad lessons that can help you in more than one facet of this lovely little skill we’re all diligently acquiring. I believe that this topic is broad enough to cover the aforementioned sticking points, as well as a few others (non-game related.) Let’s get to it! Oh, and before you start doubting my methods, just know that it is field tested, and mother approved. I use it…I get mine…if you use it, you could get yours too!
I should probably kick this thing off by attempting to define what assuming rapport means. Simply put, assuming rapport is partaking in interactions with someone you do not know as if you already know them on a certain level. The level at which you “assume†depends on the kind of interaction, and the frame you want to hold the interaction in. Have you ever opened a set when you’re really nervous and/or slightly awkward? Did the set continue in this nervous/slightly awkward frame for quite some time (either until you ejected or she blew you out?) Now, think about the many times you’ve walked up to your group of friends in the same situation and engaged them in conversation. If you could approach both in the same way, what’s stopping the tone of both from being the same?
The first impression you give the person you are interacting with is going to last throughout most of the interaction, if not all of it. It benefits you far more to give off an impression of cool comfort over nervous recitation of memorized material. This frame of mind will calm your nerves, free your brain to come up with stuff to talk about freely, and progress the interaction and relationship between you in a more natural fashion. That’s what this is all about, really. Helping you help yourself progress with everything that you do in a natural fashion. Natural game! I’ve worked my mindset to the point where I look at every social interaction in the same way. I look at every business interaction the same way. I look at every family interaction in…the…same…way. This way, I’m comfortable in how I am perceived by the other people I’m interacting with and don’t run in to the possibility of putting someone on a pedestal accidentally…which we all know is a big no-no!
[b]Rapport with a Girl-of-Interest[/b]
You like girls. You have for some time now. Chances are, you’ve interacted with them quite a bit…have a few female friends, have had a few girlfriends, maybe have a small harem under your control as you read this. Basically, you’ve had success in interacting with women somewhere, on some level. Once the initial meet/interview/acceptance barrier is broken, things chill out. You both get comfortable, open up with who you really are, and feed off each other easier when conversing. I use my closest female friend as my own example for this assumption. If you do not have a female friend, I [b]STRONGLY[/b] suggest you get your happy ass up right now and go get one. For some reason, it seems a lot of guys have problems with this. I’ll make it simple for you. Keep your dick out of her. Treat her like a lady, but talk to her like one of your friends. THEN…take notes on how you two interact from day-to-day. Take this girl out drinking with you and your bros. Spend time shootin’ the shit with her in the bar. This will be the easiest basis for you to acquire for assuming rapport with women you don’t know. If you can recreate what you do with her (for the most part) with women you approach (but obviously referring to the verbal portions…you still need kino, etc to get where you want to be…but that’s an entirely different matter than the one at hand) you will relieve yourself of many unnecessary stresses of pickup. I believe this technique to be similar to the “insta-clique†you can sometimes get with a girl you meet. It’s all about the similar feeling of comfort.
[b]Rapport in a Work Environment[/b]
This example should be just as easy to pick up, and put in to action as the last. To prevent myself from reiterating crap I’ve already said in different words; deal with new clients, new employees, new bosses, new janitors…whomever…in the same general way. I feel this projects that you are not intimidated by authority figures (yet respect them), that you do not look down upon your peers (yet respect them), and are genuine no matter the situation.
In closing, I’m just trying to help you feel more comfortable, and seem the same to those you approach. The community is evolving…the days where canned openers and rehearsed multi-threaded stacks and gambits are gone. They exist now merely in principle. You need to take what those before you have done, understand the concepts, and adopt them in a natural way. This is one small stepping stone towards that goal. But, this small step will take you a long way. I could go on about this, but I've been sitting on fragments of this topic for far too long...this came about for a few select members that I've taken personal interest in helping. Hope you know who you are, and take this and drive it home, baby. Ciao!
Dallas PUA
The Pickup Artist Playground
Assume Rapport
8 posts
• Page 1 of 1
by Guest » Thu Apr 23, 2009 3:41 pm
[quote1240519124=Smirks]
If you do not have a female friend, I [b]STRONGLY[/b] suggest you get your happy ass up right now and go get one. For some reason, it seems a lot of guys have problems with this. I’ll make it simple for you. Keep your dick out of her. Treat her like a lady, but talk to her like one of your friends. THEN…take notes on how you two interact from day-to-day. [/quote1240519124]
The entire post was really good, but I can't stress enough how helpful the above quote has been to me and my game. If I were to reduce my game to three simple rules it'd be:
1) dress cool
2) hang around lots of women (whether or not you're trying to sleep with them)
3) don't take things so seriously
If you do not have a female friend, I [b]STRONGLY[/b] suggest you get your happy ass up right now and go get one. For some reason, it seems a lot of guys have problems with this. I’ll make it simple for you. Keep your dick out of her. Treat her like a lady, but talk to her like one of your friends. THEN…take notes on how you two interact from day-to-day. [/quote1240519124]
The entire post was really good, but I can't stress enough how helpful the above quote has been to me and my game. If I were to reduce my game to three simple rules it'd be:
1) dress cool
2) hang around lots of women (whether or not you're trying to sleep with them)
3) don't take things so seriously
- Guest
by Guest » Fri Apr 24, 2009 11:40 pm
Smirks:
How do you meet a girl and turn her into a friend? I want my friend who is a girl to be relatively hot. So if I am sarging her so to speak how do I take the interaction so she knows she is just a friend?
And if the puss is available how the fuck do you not fuck? Ahh self restraint. One of the things I am working on in my absence.
How do you meet a girl and turn her into a friend? I want my friend who is a girl to be relatively hot. So if I am sarging her so to speak how do I take the interaction so she knows she is just a friend?
And if the puss is available how the fuck do you not fuck? Ahh self restraint. One of the things I am working on in my absence.
- Guest
by Guest » Sat Apr 25, 2009 12:22 pm
You said it yourself: self-restraint. Keep yourself from going for the kiss, going for the touchy touchy, etc. Lack of kino can express a more friend-like frame. Work the way you word shit to lack sexual under tones, but have lots of comfort (i.e. instead of, "I can't even be talking to you right now, I'll corrupt you" say, "I can't even talk to you right now...you don't seem like you could hang w/ the boys.") It may be easier for me to see and execute because I do it often, but I don't think talking to a chick in a non-lets fuck frame is difficult. I talk to female friends like I do you guys...even if a girl has attraction for you initially, it will most likely not be expressed and eventually disappear because the friendship will mean a lot more than a bit of sexual chemistry to her.
Give it a shot bro, not as hard as ya think~!
Give it a shot bro, not as hard as ya think~!
- Guest
by Guest » Sat Apr 25, 2009 11:59 pm
[quote1240721927=Smirks]
You said it yourself: self-restraint. Keep yourself from going for the kiss, going for the touchy touchy, etc. Lack of kino can express a more friend-like frame. Work the way you word shit to lack sexual under tones, but have lots of comfort (i.e. instead of, "I can't even be talking to you right now, I'll corrupt you" say, "I can't even talk to you right now...you don't seem like you could hang w/ the boys.") It may be easier for me to see and execute because I do it often, but I don't think talking to a chick in a non-lets fuck frame is difficult. I talk to female friends like I do you guys...even if a girl has attraction for you initially, it will most likely not be expressed and eventually disappear because the friendship will mean a lot more than a bit of sexual chemistry to her.
Give it a shot bro, not as hard as ya think~!
[/quote1240721927]
Hella Good Advice.
Well Said
You said it yourself: self-restraint. Keep yourself from going for the kiss, going for the touchy touchy, etc. Lack of kino can express a more friend-like frame. Work the way you word shit to lack sexual under tones, but have lots of comfort (i.e. instead of, "I can't even be talking to you right now, I'll corrupt you" say, "I can't even talk to you right now...you don't seem like you could hang w/ the boys.") It may be easier for me to see and execute because I do it often, but I don't think talking to a chick in a non-lets fuck frame is difficult. I talk to female friends like I do you guys...even if a girl has attraction for you initially, it will most likely not be expressed and eventually disappear because the friendship will mean a lot more than a bit of sexual chemistry to her.
Give it a shot bro, not as hard as ya think~!
[/quote1240721927]
Hella Good Advice.
Well Said
- Guest
- Guest
8 posts
• Page 1 of 1
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests