I was thinking about this question today, I want to know what you think.
We all know that chasing a woman is suicide. And when I say chasing, I mean trying to impress her, qualifying yourself, and basically in other words putting her above you as a man.
On the other hand, anyone with experience can tell you that you need to hit on a woman if you're gonna fuck her in the end. I mean, you can't just hang back and have her chase you all the way to the bedroom, not in the real world, id doesn't work that way. You have to make it sexual, and it has to be present the whole time, you can't "spring it on her" suddenly if you follow.
So how would you verbalize the difference? To put it another way, can you tell the difference, in words, between "chasing" and expressing interest, ie "hitting on her," where one is negative to your game and the other is positive?
Dallas PUA
The Pickup Artist Playground
Chasing
by Guest » Thu Feb 17, 2011 6:49 pm
[QUOTE=grimm1111;40354]I was thinking about this question today, I want to know what you think.
We all know that chasing a woman is suicide. And when I say chasing, I mean trying to impress her, qualifying yourself, and basically in other words putting her above you as a man.
On the other hand, anyone with experience can tell you that you need to hit on a woman if you're gonna fuck her in the end. I mean, you can't just hang back and have her chase you all the way to the bedroom, not in the real world, id doesn't work that way. You have to make it sexual, and it has to be present the whole time, you can't "spring it on her" suddenly if you follow.
So how would you verbalize the difference? To put it another way, can you tell the difference, in words, between "chasing" and expressing interest, ie "hitting on her," where one is negative to your game and the other is positive?[/QUOTE]
[SIZE=2]Good question. Right on point here Grimm. I'll take a swing.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]"Chase" is community driven terminology. I read it applied many different ways for all sorts of circumstances. Unfortunately without proper context it really doesn't mean much of anything.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]The origins of the term were (at the most basic level) taken in relation to cold approach. In essence it is considered "chasing" when you display behaviour not congruent with your social status aka you are reaching for her or are perceived to be doing so. You make the zeitgeist feel like you are forcing or attempting to force a choice rather than it was smooth and the way of the world - i.e. the girl's idea to begin with (or even 50/50 if you are really good). Using a plethroa of initial tactics to do so.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]Tyler Durden "flipping the screen/chase switch" a good post that always comes to mind on stuff like this. The trick is to go right out of the gate to make it all seem innocent, chance, whatever. By that I mean your body language, tonality, willingness to walk, lack of jealousy/trust/women hater issues. What you actually say can be secondary but those concepts are extremely powerful and attractive to women. I have seen top guys put them at comfort, get the slightest sign and it's straight into "is you pussy shaved?"..[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]Relatedly, I fully advocate the approach to "pick girls that pick you first". If your mantra is "that girl ->" and you get upset when it doesn't work you are an idiot. There should nothing vested to any interaction. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]Learn how to spot the likely good ones. You go in, flip that switch and let her make the female move. If she isn't into it (recall for WHATEVER reason - hence don't feel rejected) then move on. Once you observe her interest (touches you, talks with sparkly eyes, displays interest in you personally - whatever you know what I mean) you can parlay that with her, with other girls, etc etc etc. You win. Building blocks until you reach the summit.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]I think it all comes back to evolutionary psychology again. Girl needs to know you are a catch and their dirty little secret is they always choose in spite of declaring they "want to be approached, to be picked up, etc.." Bullshit. Any good guy can attest you will stand around a club, dance with your mates whatever and girls just kind of "happen" to be standing by you or around you or eyeing you up. This is their "approach" so now you have an open and you are no longer chasing IMO. That's just one example of a lot.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]A book could be written on the topic. As always also more easily shown in person than cold hard text. Why? Subject matter requires tuning in to the energy of others. Not much of that going on writing to a CPU.[/SIZE]
We all know that chasing a woman is suicide. And when I say chasing, I mean trying to impress her, qualifying yourself, and basically in other words putting her above you as a man.
On the other hand, anyone with experience can tell you that you need to hit on a woman if you're gonna fuck her in the end. I mean, you can't just hang back and have her chase you all the way to the bedroom, not in the real world, id doesn't work that way. You have to make it sexual, and it has to be present the whole time, you can't "spring it on her" suddenly if you follow.
So how would you verbalize the difference? To put it another way, can you tell the difference, in words, between "chasing" and expressing interest, ie "hitting on her," where one is negative to your game and the other is positive?[/QUOTE]
[SIZE=2]Good question. Right on point here Grimm. I'll take a swing.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]"Chase" is community driven terminology. I read it applied many different ways for all sorts of circumstances. Unfortunately without proper context it really doesn't mean much of anything.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]The origins of the term were (at the most basic level) taken in relation to cold approach. In essence it is considered "chasing" when you display behaviour not congruent with your social status aka you are reaching for her or are perceived to be doing so. You make the zeitgeist feel like you are forcing or attempting to force a choice rather than it was smooth and the way of the world - i.e. the girl's idea to begin with (or even 50/50 if you are really good). Using a plethroa of initial tactics to do so.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]Tyler Durden "flipping the screen/chase switch" a good post that always comes to mind on stuff like this. The trick is to go right out of the gate to make it all seem innocent, chance, whatever. By that I mean your body language, tonality, willingness to walk, lack of jealousy/trust/women hater issues. What you actually say can be secondary but those concepts are extremely powerful and attractive to women. I have seen top guys put them at comfort, get the slightest sign and it's straight into "is you pussy shaved?"..[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]Relatedly, I fully advocate the approach to "pick girls that pick you first". If your mantra is "that girl ->" and you get upset when it doesn't work you are an idiot. There should nothing vested to any interaction. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]Learn how to spot the likely good ones. You go in, flip that switch and let her make the female move. If she isn't into it (recall for WHATEVER reason - hence don't feel rejected) then move on. Once you observe her interest (touches you, talks with sparkly eyes, displays interest in you personally - whatever you know what I mean) you can parlay that with her, with other girls, etc etc etc. You win. Building blocks until you reach the summit.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]I think it all comes back to evolutionary psychology again. Girl needs to know you are a catch and their dirty little secret is they always choose in spite of declaring they "want to be approached, to be picked up, etc.." Bullshit. Any good guy can attest you will stand around a club, dance with your mates whatever and girls just kind of "happen" to be standing by you or around you or eyeing you up. This is their "approach" so now you have an open and you are no longer chasing IMO. That's just one example of a lot.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]A book could be written on the topic. As always also more easily shown in person than cold hard text. Why? Subject matter requires tuning in to the energy of others. Not much of that going on writing to a CPU.[/SIZE]
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Feb 21, 2011 3:56 pm
[QUOTE=grimm1111;40354]I was thinking about this question today, I want to know what you think.
We all know that chasing a woman is suicide. And when I say chasing, I mean trying to impress her, qualifying yourself, and basically in other words putting her above you as a man.
On the other hand, anyone with experience can tell you that you need to hit on a woman if you're gonna fuck her in the end. I mean, you can't just hang back and have her chase you all the way to the bedroom, not in the real world, id doesn't work that way. You have to make it sexual, and it has to be present the whole time, you can't "spring it on her" suddenly if you follow.
So how would you verbalize the difference? To put it another way, can you tell the difference, in words, between "chasing" and expressing interest, ie "hitting on her," where one is negative to your game and the other is positive?[/QUOTE]
Man invests in woman. Woman invests in man. Man rewards woman for good behavior. Woman keeps investing to get rewarded. Womans reward IS investment from man. Its like a perfect circle of happiness :)
You wont ever have a girl chase you without some return on investment. High value women and 9's and 10's will not chase us. They have too many options... they will and should however invest equally as much as you do.
I dont give a shit how hot a chic is... If she doesnt invest at least equally as much as I do then I'm not wasting my time. There are way too many level headed hotties out there that are waiting to be picked up and will treat a man properly.
I think some guys think they are being chased when they are actually just getting a return on interest lol. I use the same game on every girl and while usually i notice its mostly an equal 50/50 investment from both sides... sometimes some girls will go crazy and chase hard core.
From my experience the girls who do chase without much investment in return are NOT GOOD GIRLS!!! They have issues and are full of drama.
If you established the interraction correctly and all key ingredients are in place... The womans reward will actually BE when the man invests in her. A man Investing too much too quickly is unattractive and a dlv. Investing just the right amount in the beginning is obviously key. Paying attention to any moment when she is qualifying herself or attempting to build rapport is uber important as the payoff is huge if a guy knows what to do with this info. As soon as you see these signs reward her and she will only continue to qualify herself and work to establish a deeper rapport. It is possible to turn a dominant woman submissive as long as she trusts you completely. She has to feel safe with you and you do this by letting her know its ok to be submissive. We do this when she is qualifying or attempting to build rapport with us. You would never want to tease a girl or be cocky funny when she is in this stage as she will then loose trust and blanket herself with sheilds of protection. Its simple. And once the relationship has been confirmed and established all of this is less important because the prereq's have been fulfilled.
We all know that chasing a woman is suicide. And when I say chasing, I mean trying to impress her, qualifying yourself, and basically in other words putting her above you as a man.
On the other hand, anyone with experience can tell you that you need to hit on a woman if you're gonna fuck her in the end. I mean, you can't just hang back and have her chase you all the way to the bedroom, not in the real world, id doesn't work that way. You have to make it sexual, and it has to be present the whole time, you can't "spring it on her" suddenly if you follow.
So how would you verbalize the difference? To put it another way, can you tell the difference, in words, between "chasing" and expressing interest, ie "hitting on her," where one is negative to your game and the other is positive?[/QUOTE]
Man invests in woman. Woman invests in man. Man rewards woman for good behavior. Woman keeps investing to get rewarded. Womans reward IS investment from man. Its like a perfect circle of happiness :)
You wont ever have a girl chase you without some return on investment. High value women and 9's and 10's will not chase us. They have too many options... they will and should however invest equally as much as you do.
I dont give a shit how hot a chic is... If she doesnt invest at least equally as much as I do then I'm not wasting my time. There are way too many level headed hotties out there that are waiting to be picked up and will treat a man properly.
I think some guys think they are being chased when they are actually just getting a return on interest lol. I use the same game on every girl and while usually i notice its mostly an equal 50/50 investment from both sides... sometimes some girls will go crazy and chase hard core.
From my experience the girls who do chase without much investment in return are NOT GOOD GIRLS!!! They have issues and are full of drama.
If you established the interraction correctly and all key ingredients are in place... The womans reward will actually BE when the man invests in her. A man Investing too much too quickly is unattractive and a dlv. Investing just the right amount in the beginning is obviously key. Paying attention to any moment when she is qualifying herself or attempting to build rapport is uber important as the payoff is huge if a guy knows what to do with this info. As soon as you see these signs reward her and she will only continue to qualify herself and work to establish a deeper rapport. It is possible to turn a dominant woman submissive as long as she trusts you completely. She has to feel safe with you and you do this by letting her know its ok to be submissive. We do this when she is qualifying or attempting to build rapport with us. You would never want to tease a girl or be cocky funny when she is in this stage as she will then loose trust and blanket herself with sheilds of protection. Its simple. And once the relationship has been confirmed and established all of this is less important because the prereq's have been fulfilled.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Feb 21, 2011 4:13 pm
[QUOTE=Carnal;40404]And once the relationship has been confirmed and established all of this is less important because the prereq's have been fulfilled.[/QUOTE]
I disagree. The real Game actually begins when the relationship is established. She'll begin testing you harder, longer, and more fervorantly than she did early on because she has become embolden and needs confirmation from you that you're still a man despite the fact that you've cast aside your biological drives, to fuck as many women as possible, to be with her and only her.
Getting into a relationship is the easy part. Keeping it heathly, vibrant, loving, and full of passion is the hard part.
I disagree. The real Game actually begins when the relationship is established. She'll begin testing you harder, longer, and more fervorantly than she did early on because she has become embolden and needs confirmation from you that you're still a man despite the fact that you've cast aside your biological drives, to fuck as many women as possible, to be with her and only her.
Getting into a relationship is the easy part. Keeping it heathly, vibrant, loving, and full of passion is the hard part.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Feb 21, 2011 5:01 pm
Word. Ive been in an 8 year, and 2 one year relationships. Ive not encountered what you are stating here. Every man has a different situation and type of personality. Maybe it is possible that if you encountered this type of scenario you were not fullfilling your part of the relationship i.e. properly taking care of your women before she has to check YOU.
Someone COULD misinterpret that sentence in my post and be mislead for sure.
Let me explain what I was intending to convey. It is of my opinion... that once a man has these basic prereq's (tools) mastered and he enters into a relationship, these tools should continue to be apart of his subconcious daily life.
They are a necessity. Its called being normal. It shouldnt take too much effort...
Someone COULD misinterpret that sentence in my post and be mislead for sure.
Let me explain what I was intending to convey. It is of my opinion... that once a man has these basic prereq's (tools) mastered and he enters into a relationship, these tools should continue to be apart of his subconcious daily life.
They are a necessity. Its called being normal. It shouldnt take too much effort...
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Feb 21, 2011 5:21 pm
I imagine you and I have completely different beliefs with respect to women and how they 'behave' in a relationship. I contend that you can provide her with everything that she wants and needs and she'll STILL clamor for just a little bit more. It's just the overly entitled nature of most Western women combined with their natural biological forces.
So, regardless, the chances are pretty high that she'll challenge your masculinity no matter what. Women are like children, they push boundaries, they challenge men, they test them to make sure that he'll stand up to her and guide her as the two of you engage in your relationship.
Men and women are different. Men are more strategic thinkers, we're more likely to lead, and we're problem solvers. Women are social networkers and nurturers. These are different roles. In order for a woman to be able to fulfill her biological desires and purpose she must KNOW that she will be safe, protected, and provided for by a man. The best way for her to test whether this is the case is to challenge his strength and power through the form of shit tests. They simply never stop.
Shit tests in a relationship are not a function of not getting all that a woman needs and desires from her man. Instead, they're just a biological tick that she has that she does to reassure herself that you're the man that you promise to be so that she can be the woman that nature intended for her to be.
By saying that the man is not fulfilling his part of the relationship thus resulting in a 'test' puts the impetus on the man. When, in fact, it has nothing to do with the man. It's just a biological necessity. All women do it and they do it regardless of the circumstances. If you were in relationships where you didn't get 'checked' then I would suggest that you weren't looking hard enough. Or you didn't even see the shit test for what it was. Which is fine, sometimes the best way to pass a shit test is to be oblivious towards one.
[QUOTE=Carnal;40406]Someone COULD misinterpret that sentence in my post and be mislead for sure.
Let me explain what I was intending to convey. It is of my opinion... that once a man has these basic prereq's (tools) mastered and he enters into a relationship, these tools should continue to be apart of his subconcious daily life.
They are a necessity. Its called being normal. It shouldnt take too much effort...[/QUOTE]
I agree with you 100%. My point was that too many men enter the Community with the idea that this is an olympic event. You train for it, then you go compete, then you 'win' or 'lose.' Then, it's over. When, in fact, the truth is that it's a lifestyle that you never stop living. You will always be in training, there is no final event, you do not win or lose at Game, you just play.
So, regardless, the chances are pretty high that she'll challenge your masculinity no matter what. Women are like children, they push boundaries, they challenge men, they test them to make sure that he'll stand up to her and guide her as the two of you engage in your relationship.
Men and women are different. Men are more strategic thinkers, we're more likely to lead, and we're problem solvers. Women are social networkers and nurturers. These are different roles. In order for a woman to be able to fulfill her biological desires and purpose she must KNOW that she will be safe, protected, and provided for by a man. The best way for her to test whether this is the case is to challenge his strength and power through the form of shit tests. They simply never stop.
Shit tests in a relationship are not a function of not getting all that a woman needs and desires from her man. Instead, they're just a biological tick that she has that she does to reassure herself that you're the man that you promise to be so that she can be the woman that nature intended for her to be.
By saying that the man is not fulfilling his part of the relationship thus resulting in a 'test' puts the impetus on the man. When, in fact, it has nothing to do with the man. It's just a biological necessity. All women do it and they do it regardless of the circumstances. If you were in relationships where you didn't get 'checked' then I would suggest that you weren't looking hard enough. Or you didn't even see the shit test for what it was. Which is fine, sometimes the best way to pass a shit test is to be oblivious towards one.
[QUOTE=Carnal;40406]Someone COULD misinterpret that sentence in my post and be mislead for sure.
Let me explain what I was intending to convey. It is of my opinion... that once a man has these basic prereq's (tools) mastered and he enters into a relationship, these tools should continue to be apart of his subconcious daily life.
They are a necessity. Its called being normal. It shouldnt take too much effort...[/QUOTE]
I agree with you 100%. My point was that too many men enter the Community with the idea that this is an olympic event. You train for it, then you go compete, then you 'win' or 'lose.' Then, it's over. When, in fact, the truth is that it's a lifestyle that you never stop living. You will always be in training, there is no final event, you do not win or lose at Game, you just play.
- Guest
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