The Game is a Game

[Guest]

This post has been a long time coming. I’ve thought long and hard about what I noticed one day while watching my beloved St. Louis Cardinals fall out of contention for the NL Wild Card. It sparked half of this observation. The other half was sparked much more recently while I was watching a college football game of no real consequence. To this day, I still don’t really know which two teams were playing each other because I was too involved in finding the parallels between sports and the Game. My observations came to one simple overriding conclusion: the Game is fundamentally a game.

First, I’d like to start with the significance of sports in a man’s world. Believe it or not, but competitive sport is a relatively new concept in American culture. Sure, sure people have been competing at sport for thousands of years…well before the first Olympiad in Athens. It is inherently human to want to show off one’s physical prowess to stake your claim as a dominate individual, to show off your superior genetic make up to potential mates, and for the fun of it. Over time, as is the case with a lot of modifications to human behavior, society and culture tend to get in the way, as was the case in America.

Rewind to the late 1800’s, the Industrial Revolution was in full force in the United States (officially, it began in England and took a while for it to cross the Atlantic). Factories begin popping up left and right, creating jobs, and drawing people to central geographic locations. This eventually kick started a shift in where people lived. Before the Industrial Revolution, the U.S. was much more agrarian in composition. When Alexis de Tocqueville visited the United States in 1831, 10 out of every 11 Americans lived on family farms.

As the Industrial Revolution gained steam, pardon the pun, the shift from an agrarian based society shifted to one of an urban based society. Enter urbanization. Individuals from the rural areas of the U.S. began coming to the city in search of economic opportunity. Unfortunately, most of this opportunity was found in factory work. One of the big advances of the Industrial Revolution was interchangeable parts, and if you think that these ‘parts’ only referred to screws, nails, and gears, you’re wrong. As time passed, it became clear that a worker was interchangeable as well, and thus had very little identity (when viewed through the frame of work). Can you imagine how beta that had to make a man at that time feel? There had to be a way to show the world that you were stronger than your peers. As time passed, these men would find that opportunity on the field.

Up to this time, sports were an outlet that people used to stay fit. And, it was typically reserved for those with a lot of leisure time, namely the rich. I’m not going to get into the evolution of sports as a medium for competition other than to say that over time that became the primary purpose of sports in American culture. The spirit of competition. It was an outlet that common men, interchangeable men, could use to display their dominance, a medium to show the world that they were strong, healthy, vibrant, and unique. On the field, the goal was to show the world that you are not interchangeable.

Fast forward to today and the pick-up movement. Over the last 100 years, the scales have tipped in favor of women. Some of the changes that have taken place were for the best, some may be not. But, as the role of women changed in our society so did the role of men. As women became more independent and aggressive, men had to adjust to those changes. Unfortunately, no adjustments were made. And, once again our culture was left with a population of men that didn’t know what it meant to be men. The feminization of men sparked this latest revolution. The same social dynamics that sparked the importance of competitive sports in our culture has been the root cause of the ground swell of The Game: we simply want to be men.

The parallels between The Game and sports are striking. Obviously, it’s called ‘The Game’ for a reason. Gentlemen, it is a game. Some of this may seem elementary to you, some of it intuitive, but the metaphor cannot be lost. For the newbies out there, I think the comparison I’m getting ready to lay out will help you ‘see’ things a little better. It will, hopefully, provide you with a much greater understanding of the dynamics and mechanics, metaphorically speaking of course, behind The Game.

Rules – Before you play any game, you have to understand the rules. Otherwise, you won’t quite get it. The interesting thing about The Game versus any other game is that you learn the rules while you’re on the field. Sure, you can read about them in any book or from a mentor or at a boot camp but you only really begin to internalize them once you’ve played ‘ball.’ Another interesting thing is that rules in The Game are different for different people. There is no one rulebook that 100% governs everyone playing our game, sure there are certain truths, but with everyone’s style comes with it specific dos and don’ts.

Game Plan – I alluded to this already and I can’t stress what an important aspect to The Game it is, especially when you’re just getting started. Before you go sarging, you need to have a list of 3 or 4 things that you want to do that you feel will result in success. For example, in order for me to ‘win’ tonight I’m going to approach at least 10 sets, I’m going to approach using a direct opener, I’m going to focus on keeping my body language powerful, and I’m going to try to run the Cube at least 4 times. Notice that all of these ‘goals’ are all 100% controlled by you. I’ve always been of the belief that you prepare yourself with the knowledge and experience you have, create a rough plan, and then execute. If you don’t succeed, and by succeed I mean close someone, then you can review your game plan and the effectiveness of each point and adjust from there. Regardless though, if you fired on all cylinders and executed your game plan, even if you didn’t succeed, you will have accomplished something. Which is better? Going out, not succeeding, and not accomplishing anything. Or going out, not succeeding, and executing on your game plan. Further, I encourage you to change your game plan to keep things fresh and to get out of your comfort zone. This is the best way to create that formula, or set of plays, that works best for you as you develop you PU skills.

Plays – I define plays as routines, stories, and other tactics that you do with the express purpose of creating attraction. I’m not a big fan of routines or stacking or whatever. But, when I started you bet your ass I used them. They serve an important role because they prevent you from thinking while in the middle of running a set. You focus on executing the play instead of what’s going on with the set. As such, you appear to be going with the flow (even if you aren’t). Plays are important, because they help you move down the field, but I would contend that if you rely on them 100% you won’t always get you across the goal line. Further, some plays work better for some teams than others. You have to use your strengths, and as such some routines just won’t work for you, no matter how hard you want them to. Cock Funny doesn’t work for everyone, neither does The Cube. Figure out your bread and butter plays, and when all else fails don’t be afraid to run them from time to time. Just keep in mind, that they are a tool, not an identity.

Practice – Very few individuals can walk into a bar after reading a couple of books and start pulling chicks. It generally doesn’t work that way. So, just like practice is required for success at any other sport or game the same holds true for The Game. The only way you get good, and I mean really good is to get out there and try this stuff. Yes, you will fail miserably, but experience will become your friend. The first few months I was in the Community, I looked at it as practice. It meant nothing other than helping me become comfortable with my style and the rules that came with said style. In addition, I would take any and every opportunity to ‘Game’ a woman, even if I knew there was no chance with her or didn’t really want her. I still looked at the interaction as practice for the time in which I would meet someone I really did want.

Preparation – It’s not enough to practice, to read, to be coached, to have plays, to have a game plan…everyone else does. Instead, you have to differentiate yourself OUTSIDE of PU. This is where being a well-rounded individual comes into play. Do you think world class athletes only spend their time practicing to throw or run or catch? No. They hit the gym, they feed their mind. Lynn Swan, the star receiver from the Pittsburgh Steelers dynasty of the late 1970’s, made some of the most beautiful catches ever. He learned to contort his body the way he did by studying ballet. Jerry Rice, one of the greatest, if not the greatest, receivers ever grew up catching bricks thrown to him by his father. These guys prepared outside of the realm of their sport, they prepared in ways that their peers never did, and these guys are the guys we talk about today. The fruits of the Game are found on the field, but it’s played well before the whistle blows.

Coaching – There will always be those in life that are a little more experienced than you. Those that can observe you objectively and give you rock solid advice free from the effects of emotion. During your journey, it’s important to recognize who these people are and, even more importantly, to seek out their opinion. This was always a weak point in my development, I never sought out anyone to critique me in anyway, as such I know I’ve got some poor mechanics. I’ve learned to overcome them, but it’s still something that holds me back slightly. Coaches allow you to nail down the fundamentals of PU. Really good coaches allow you to capture the fundamentals within the confines of your innate skill set and style.

Deconstructing – Call it Monday Morning Quarterbacking. After you play your Game, you always need to take a step back and think about what you did right, what you did wrong, and how you can be better. This is the primary purpose of FRs and LRs, although some guys seem to use them to brag about their sexual conquests. Even if you never ever post them, even if you’re the only person to ever read them, you still need to write them. They are tools that for you to help you see your interaction(s) laid out on paper. You can run through them over and over again, critiquing yourself. I know that my very first FRs and LRs were chalked full of places where I went ‘astray.’ Take the time to write these out, take the time to read them over and over again, and learn from your past mistakes and successes.

Reaction – The concept of practice and reaction goes hand in hand. The idea with all the practice you’re doing is to react, instead of analyze. The goal is to be able to do this stuff as if it were second nature, as if it were innate. The best way of getting to this point is to practice, to gain experience. I like to think of it like this. You’re the quarterback. It’s your job to analyze a situation and determine what is and what is not appropriate BEFORE the play starts. Once you snap the ball though, you have to go off of you talent, experience, and preparations. So many things happen so fast, that you simply don’t have time to process all of them. As such, you have to have a general idea what you’re going to do, a game plan if you will. You also have to know what is truly important and what is not, call them shortcuts. Once the whistle blows though, you’ve got to turn off your higher functioning thought processes and become reactionary. You’ve got to lean on your skill, knowledge, and experience. The quarterbacks that ‘turn off’ their brain and become reactionary have a much better chance of ending in the end zone than the quarterback that’s always thinking, he on the other hand ends up getting crushed.

The Zone – Allow me to set the stage. It’s the 1993 NBA Finals, Game 1 at Chicago Stadium. The Bulls versus the Trailblazers. In sports nomenclature, it’s called ‘The Shrug.’ Jordan just hit yet another three pointer, and he looks over to Magic Johnson, who was announcing the game on the sidelines, and Jordan shrugs in bewilderment. Jordan scored 35 points in the first half of the game (an NBA Finals record) which included 6 of 8 from behind the arc. Some of you will remember that game, I know I do. I just couldn’t wrap my head around how a human could register such an amazing performance, he simply couldn’t miss. He was automatic. He was in the zone. You can tell when a PUA is in the zone. He walks with an air of humble invincibility. He knows he can pull, he can just feel the interaction going his way, but they don’t usually talk about it to others. It’s a beautiful thing to be in the zone, and it’s a beautiful thing to watch a fellow PUA in the zone. Sometimes, you simply cannot miss. Sometimes, the world slows down and you can see what’s going to happen next. These are the moments you live for.

Momentum – This is probably one of the single most important aspects of The Game that no one ever really talks about. Momentum is not only used to describe motion, but also the velocity and power behind that motion. Momentum, therefore, can be used as a descriptive word defining the strength and force behind your actions. It applies directly to The Game, and to sports. How many times have you seen the Fate of a game turn on a dime? A penalty, a turnover, a strikeout, a player’s, or coach’s, ejection. Anything can change the landscape of a game, and our Game is no different. The smallest thing can turn it all around, for better or for worse. Also, remember that momentum tends to snowball. When you’ve got momentum on your side, don’t waste it, use it as kindling to fuel your fire. When you don’t have momentum, don’t fret, don’t get desperate, regroup and start over. Momentum can just as easily allow you to run 10 successful sets or to get blown out by 10 sets. It works both ways. I’ll leave you with one of the most memorable examples of the power of momentum in recent history. It’s 2004, the Red Sox are down 3 games to none to the New York Yankees. In Game 3, the Yankees crushed the Sox 19-8. The series appeared to be over as Mariano Riveria heads to the mound in the ninth of Game 4 with a 4-3 lead. Then, the Sox tied the score sending the game into extra innings where David Ortiz gave them the win in the 12th inning off a two run blast. The Sox would go on to win the next three, marking the first time a team came back from 3-0 in the playoffs. The Sox then went on to sweep the St. Louis Cardinals, who at the time sported the best record in baseball that year. Momentum can be a killer. Learn to recognize and take advantage of it.

Paper Tigers vs. Starving Alley Cats – This is my final point, and probably the most important one. If somehow one were able to definitively gauge how much someone wanted to win, compare that desire to their peers, and then watch them compete I would contend that the one with the most desire, the most hunger would win more often than the one with the most skill. Victory is determined more by will than by competency. The Game is no different. The guys that want it the most are the guys that close the most. The funny thing is that, in general, the guys that gain experience and skill lose some desire in the process. This levels out the playing field, giving the guys with heart and desire just as good a shot at pulling a girl as the most skillful in the bunch. Further, if you’re one of those rare types that combine both hunger and high level skill together in equal parts then I would contend that you are going to be unstoppable. Every time I think of hunger and desire in the context of sports, I think of Jack Youngblood the defensive end for the L.A. Rams. He is perhaps most famous for playing the entire 1979-80 playoffs, including Super Bowl XIV, with a fractured left fibula. He also played in the 1980 Pro Bowl with the injured leg, a week after the Super Bowl. Although the Rams lost the Super Bowl to the Steelers, it wasn’t for lack of Youngblood’s hunger. He was a skillful player, but he also had heart. That’s why, in 2001, he was inducted into the NFL Hall of Fame. Stay hungry.

There are two general sayings sayings about sports, "it's not if you win or lose, it's how you play" OR "winning isn't everything, it's the only thing." Which is correct? Does it matter? The overriding difference in our game is that, if down correctly and honesty and integrity, then there IS no loser. You won because the girl you pulled was what you wanted, and SHE won because see gets to see a world full of excitement with a strong, confident, powerful, man. Finally, I'd like to say that if you're genuinely playing, and you know who you are, then you can never be considered anything but victorious.

See you in the scene.

[Guest]

Don't forget timeouts...a few take away moments to prevent the possibility of coming off clingy by sticking to the same girl all night.

Half time show...that drunk friend you brought along who's always shit canned by 12am...typically rolls by half way through your set to either blow it the fuck up or at least put on a good show.

Don't be afraid to challenge a play. You don't always have to agree with what she says.

Just because you can't get the ball in the end zone, doesn't mean you can't still go for 3 and grab a kiss or a #...you'll nearly always get the ball back.

Playing well? Seems like the ball has been in your possession the entire game? Be ballsy...go for 2. Do something out of your comfort zone (and most likely hers) and see what comes up. Remember, as long as it's not surprise butt sex, you've still dominated most of the game...you'll still win.

Block for your team mates when necessary...even if you're on the offensive.

Dude, this is fun.

[Guest]

[quote1229631086=Smirks]Dude, this is fun.[/quote1229631086]


Yep, so many parallels...

[Guest]

looong read, but great post.

you've got ALOT of great points in there especially for a newbie (like me..) if a PUA prepared and took PUA as seriously as a michael jordan takes basketball, they would be phenomenal at pulling women...

[Guest]

Here's to preparing like JORDAN!!!!!
Great post Bull Run

[Guest]

Bull Run is one of the smartest people I know, and this is an awesome post full of truths and...awesomeness. He was wrong about the election though. Haha yes sir.

ps Sarah Palin is hot and I want to do her in the governers mansion. I'm saying.

[Guest]

great post! Wow!
The only thought I would add as consideration is sports competition vs say participating in a symphony. People often say that in sports there are winners and losers..but if you are part of making music together...then its possible to make great music with everyone feeling that it was a great experience...

[Guest]

[quote1230072332=Appleman]
great post! Wow!
The only thought I would add as consideration is sports competition vs say participating in a symphony. People often say that in sports there are winners and losers..but if you are part of making music together...then its possible to make great music with everyone feeling that it was a great experience...
[/quote1230072332]

well, you get to define success in this game. Its a game I take seriously.

[Guest]

Grimm and Bull Run,
You guys helped me soooooooooo much in my life. Two definitive moments with you guys and suddenly an entire childhood and young adult-life was made OK, lol.


I still think about the on-track antics to get my head right when I chase women. I remember watching "the shrug" as a kid. Total domination. Take no prisoners.

[Guest]

Iso-Cheese...

Thanks. You know I joke around alot and bust people's balls, but to be serious a moment I will say that you're truly a valued friend man. I look forward to hanging out with you again sometime.

If I do, hopefully I will be sober enough to remember it and not snockered off my ass and getting in to fights with random people for having red shirts...or so i hear.