LTR

[Guest]

[quote1217349937=Fuzz]
So I have taken a break from sarging because I entered into an LTR. The reason why is that I had never really experienced one, and I wanted to try it out and see what it's like. I think everyone should experience one as it'll make you a well rounded person, and you'll be able to relate to hummanity at large. I intend for this to last a full year. It's only been a few months so far. In the beginning cheating was a problem but I am totally manogamous right now. Alas, I think some of my skills are getting a bit rusty. Any tips on how to keep them sharp without actually cheating on the girl? Also, when the time comes what would be the least messiest way to end the relationship?
[/quote1217349937]

Hey that's great... You are thinking about settling down.
I don't know you or how old you are. But are you ready for a LTR???

I believe (my opinion only), LTR is reserved for someone you can vision yourself with as an older couple and spending the rest of your life with.
It also means you can endure ALL her FREAKING BAD side and overcome to make it work no matter what.
Because everybody has a BAD side, even the Pope, Mother Thersa has a BAD side. (no sex, too much work, giving to Others more than each other, like young boys, Church everyday, etc.)

One of the point of PUA (to me) is that you gain the self control and power to experience and CHOOSE the type of woman you want to live for the rest of your life. Or IF you finally recognize the type and calibrate of a woman you want and you know you are not the right fit for it... PUA skills can help mold you into that mature Man require for the type of woman you want.
ie. Don't marry the first girl you sleep with... or get into LTR.

Time... Your time is valuable and so is her TIME.
Someone can steal your money or property, but you can always always earn it back.
Time can never be earned back or get back. It is the most valuable thing that you have and should be spend with a Love one.
If you don't LOVE her, save yourself some TIME and move on.
If you already Cheated on her before... more than likely, she is not the one.

Have some self-respect and Confidence and VALUE yourself and your TIME.
There is no more lessons to be learned with someone you don't LOVE, because it won't endure the test of time.
When you do find that SPECIAL Love... living with her and learning LESSONs with her in a LTR is part of the Process, the path you take, the Journey.

PUA (to me) is about saving you and the potential girl TIME. (You are going the opposite direction with it... wasting Time).
Yeah... some of you may say it gets you in bed quicker, but it also allows you to get to know her and her charactistics quicker.

Good Luck...

[Guest]

I honestly don't think what Fuzz is doing is all that bad. A friend of mine, who I consider to be a natural (tons of natural alpha male characteristics) believes in what he calls Girlfriend Season.

Basically, chicks take on boyfriends in the fall and then dump them, either right after Christmas/New Years or right after Valentine's day. They probably weren't planning on it when they decided they wanted the boyfriend, but nevertheless, TONS of AFC's get their hearts ripped out of their chests every year right after these two holidays.

I mean think about it, very few women are gonna dump their boyfriend just days before Valentine's Day or right before Christmas. It's the same basic concept as "I'll keep her around as a girlfriend through such and such a date." I see very little difference. If it's fair in the female's eyes, it should definitely be fair in our eyes.

Besides, what's VERY likely to happen is he'll fail some of her shit-tests and she'll be the one dumping him long before he was planning on dumping her. Maybe he'll end up being the one with a broken heart.

[Guest]

[quote1217357520=Fuzz]
Maybe I do think she's special. I like being with, her but I'm just being honest with myself that I don't want to do this forever. How am I manipulating her if I actually think she's a great girl and want to be around her?

I'm going to take a step back and genuinely re-evaluate this because I have faith in you guys and a lot of good advice has yeilded from this board, and know most of you mean well. I just think a lot of you are under the false impression that me and this girl aren't in love.
[/quote1217357520]

i'll commend you for not escalating/getting defensive in your response.. i'll give some constructive feedback.

if you are really "in love" you don't fall "out of love" at a 1 year mark. It sounds like what you want is to be in a MLTR with her, and that's completely fine as long as it's open and honest.

I'd suggest reading up on MLTR subject either here or fastseduction

[Guest]

[quote1217358368=Alphagame]
I honestly don't think what Fuzz is doing is all that bad. A friend of mine, who I consider to be a natural (tons of natural alpha male characteristics) believes in what he calls Girlfriend Season.

Basically, chicks take on boyfriends in the fall and then dump them, either right after Christmas/New Years or right after Valentine's day. They probably weren't planning on it when they decided they wanted the boyfriend, but nevertheless, TONS of AFC's get their hearts ripped out of their chests every year right after these two holidays.

I mean think about it, very few women are gonna dump their boyfriend just days before Valentine's Day or right before Christmas. It's the same basic concept as "I'll keep her around as a girlfriend through such and such a date." I see very little difference. If it's fair in the female's eyes, it should definitely be fair in our eyes.

[/quote1217358368]

You ARE right, but it doesn't make IT right.

We can be better than that.

[Guest]

I think most of the guys were reacting to 'Also, when the time comes what would be the least messiest way to end the relationship?' which basically made it sound like you KNOW you're going to get out of it and it's just a question of when... if that's not the case then rock on :) And you never said you loved her or expressed any real emotion towards her in your original post which is probably why you got the responses you did... but like any relationship only the 2 people involved know what's really going on. I don't think anyone's telling you to break up with her if you really have feelings and see the possibility of it being a serious long term thing... only if you KNOW it's not and are just going through the motions.

[Guest]

Fuzz, what you said, "Also, when the time comes what would be the least messiest way to end the relationship?" is not something that just goes bye bye.

Thats a plain and simple message that clearly displays the frame and position you have taken with the "relationship" thus far.

I am having a hard time believing that you actually mean that last post, but I respect that you didn't get all pissy.

Look, just do yourself and her a favor and just break up. I am telling you to. Thats how I feel. Keep her as a friend. You'll hurt her by leading her on. If you love her, don't do it.

I know you'll make the right choice because you're an understanding person, and understanding people don't hurt others intentionally.

[Guest]

[quote1217450431=Finesse]
Fuzz, what you said, "Also, when the time comes what would be the least messiest way to end the relationship?" is not something that just goes bye bye.

Thats a plain and simple message that clearly displays the frame and position you have taken with the "relationship" thus far.
[/quote1217450431]

Well I guess it's more complicated than I can put into words (emotions usually are), but I have a sense that this is going to be finite. I mean, I'm not going to marry the girl or anything, but for right now we enjoy each other's company, and I want to experience a LTR for once in my life.

And I don't get angry and take any of this personally. Why would I? You guys are only trying to help me, and I usually get excellent advice on this board. I'm taking everything everyone says into honest consideration.

[Guest]

Great attitude fuzz... a lot of people are just not as well adjusted as you... my friend who was visiting this weekend... you try to tell him things to help him improve his life (like i tried to get him to go to the pua class or watch some of the material with me and he just wasn't interested) and he just gets defensive or ignores you. Turns out his game pretty much involves finding drunk and needy chicks to hook up with... but then he's sad when it never works out. Some people just don't want to hear good advice.

It sounds like you just weren't communicating the whole situation earlier... what you're saying now seems a lot more reasonable. how long have you been in the relationship? The only thing I would say is you mentioned you want it to last a year... if at some point you know it's over, cut it off don't stretch it out just for the point of doing it.

And yeah, the advice on here is usually pretty excellent :)

[Guest]

[quote1217465837=Alphagame]
I honestly don't think what Fuzz is doing is all that bad. A friend of mine, who I consider to be a natural (tons of natural alpha male characteristics) believes in what he calls Girlfriend Season.

Basically, chicks take on boyfriends in the fall and then dump them, either right after Christmas/New Years or right after Valentine's day. They probably weren't planning on it when they decided they wanted the boyfriend, but nevertheless, TONS of AFC's get their hearts ripped out of their chests every year right after these two holidays.

I mean think about it, very few women are gonna dump their boyfriend just days before Valentine's Day or right before Christmas. It's the same basic concept as "I'll keep her around as a girlfriend through such and such a date." I see very little difference. If it's fair in the female's eyes, it should definitely be fair in our eyes.

Besides, what's VERY likely to happen is he'll fail some of her shit-tests and she'll be the one dumping him long before he was planning on dumping her. Maybe he'll end up being the one with a broken heart.
[/quote1217465837]

Seriously? This has to be one of the most childish postings I've seen period on any board I post on. You create a strawman by presenting the argument that women do it so turn about is fair play? I've read 2 of your posts that only point out the fact that you were hurt in previous relationships and so you have a skewed view on reality. The challenge in life is opening yourself up. Anyone can go through life with themselves cutoff to the world.

Have I been hurt before? Yes multiple times. Would I do it again? In a heartbeat because it was good times spent and a learning experience.

[Guest]

Two times you know you're most alive in life...

When you're most in love with a girl...

And when your heart's been crushed :)