being too creepy

[Guest]

i've been away from the community for awhile and this is my first post in weeks..

i went out to kaboom town in addison july 3rd and tried out acouple of things... no success...

acouple of days before i went out to try out this pu stuff... my friend had a talk with me about being too creepy... it was an hour long conversation and it got no where in helping me... i haven't been having success with women because of this factor... i dont know how i am and how to fix it...

now i'm here posting this to seek help

[Guest]

what did he say? your post is a little vague

[Guest]

he said i say and do the creepiest things... even when i try not to be creepy, i come off as creepy... he says he can say the nastiest most perverted shit and he wouldn't come off as creepy... the girls just laugh and joke with him... but when i say as little as "hi"... i come off as creepy... he told me there could possibly no way i could fix it because no matter what i do, i'm creepy

thats the main idea of the conversation... i guess most of ya'll have to meet me to know what they are talkin about

[Guest]

doesn't sound like much of a friend to me.....just making you feel bad about yourself without offering any help. It's hard to know since I haven't met you. have you met anyone one here?

Also do you agree with him? Do you always get a bad reaction from women?

Whatever the case is, I'm sure it's something that you can improve upon, but your post is still not specific enough to offer any advice. If I had to guess I'd say don't try to be too serious or sexual, just try to keep light and fun when you talk to them. And make sure you look presentable when you meet them.

One thing i try do when I'm not doing well with the women is to just not think about all this stuff and just try to have normal conversations with women.

[Guest]

yes i agree with him and yes i always get the creepy reaction... no i dont know any1 here... my friends do try to help me and yes... everygirl i talk to says i'm creepy... i'll just start takin notes on my interactoins and post it on here so ya'll will know what i'm talkin about

[Guest]

I just read one of your earlier posts where you say your friends put you down in front of women all the time to make themselves look better. I'll say it again. These are not friends. Stop hanging out with them.

[Guest]

is that just some dude telling you that or is that coming from a girl? when a girl uses the word "creepy" she basically is talking about a guy who likes her more than she likes him, that's all.

if Brad Pitt grabs a random girl's ass, that's not creepy to a girl. if Chester the 350 pound bald sweaty IT guy grabs a hot girl's ass, that's creepy.

If girls are telling you that you're creepy do more disqualification and run more attraction material especially early on.

[Guest]

creepiness takes into consideration alot of different things.

it could be the words in which you deliver it
it could be the body language
it could be the facial expressions
it could be your logistics when you do it.
it could be the tonality.
it's possible you are hesitating.
it could be the entire frame you have set for yourself from the get go and thus incongruent.
it could be lack of eye contact.

honestly man, I disagree with what these fine gentlemen have said. I think he has done you a favor, if he has indeed made you aware of whats going on. if he just brought it up, try and get him to help you identify what it is that makes people creep out.

I think he's a good friend. I strive to have at least a few people like this in my life.

Some guys that are naturally good dont have a reason why a person is or isnt creepy, he just knows. Just because he doesnt know why doesnt make him inherently bad or good as a friend. He just pointed out what he saw.

[Guest]

[quote1215304040=Finesse]
creepiness takes into consideration alot of different things.

it could be the words in which you deliver it
it could be the body language
it could be the facial expressions
it could be your logistics when you do it.
it could be the tonality.
it's possible you are hesitating.
it could be the entire frame you have set for yourself from the get go and thus incongruent.
it could be lack of eye contact.

[/quote1215304040]


that's too complicated man :) look finesse is right but the bottom line is just be sure you don't come on stronger than she is ready for.

meet a girl, tell her within 5 minutes that you're dreaming about your future relationship together and the kids names etc that is very creepy unless you're obviously joking (in which case it isn't because she knows you don't mean it). Tell her that deep in the relationship stage when she's thinking about it too and it's very romantic. All other variables the same, the point is just that she has warmed up to you.

those are extreme examples, but that's the formula. works with kino too. average joe walks right up to a stranger and runs his hand up her thigh, he's a creep. average joe walks up to his girlfriend and runs his hand up her thigh, she gets hot. All other variables the same.

Just disqualify man. I.E don't show too much interest too soon.

[Guest]

it's not doing him a favor if they insult him in front of women and then tell him privately he's creepy and there's nothing he can do about it.

"he told me there could possibly no way i could fix it because no matter what i do, i'm creepy"

this doesn't sound like someone trying to help you. go to one of the meetups and get someone to watch you. I think you will get much more objective advice.


I guess my whole point is that if this is the same guy that insults you and amogs you then I'm not sure I would trust what he says....he has an agenda. If it's someone else that you trust, then maybe the criticism is legitimate.

It could be so many things or even a combination of things that you need to change, but there's so little information in your posts that I dont really think anyone here can tell you specifically what you are doing wrong.