I'm already hating this...

[The Lisenby Effect]

Hey guys, i didn't know where to put this, so i put it here not to mess up the flow of the other threads...

K so i just joined the site recently, already told about my self a little, let me go more into depth and see if i can get some... "comments and suggestions".

Already know when you guys read this most will laugh, talk shit, w/e you want, but i don't care, i'm trying to change and improve, i think i'm on the right path...

So when i was 17 i got into a relationship with a girl. To make it easy on you guys' eyes, it was the best thing in the world. I was in true love. We went through so many trials and tribulations to test if we were meant to be together it's not even funny. she thought she was preg, she wasn't, had an STD show up, i got tested, didn't have it, almost broke up, she got tested a week later and didn't have it, went through losing family members, drama with people accusing each of us of cheating, just so many things 17-19 yr olds should not have gone through, i think.

I was a wreck, i always questioned why people ever considered wanting to kill themselves, i now knew the feelings you go through when you want to. It took what little i had left in me to not walk into 121 on coming traffic and end it. I took a week or two off work, got some what better, still did not talk to anyone or look at women in the same way. Then i go back to work, at the time i worked at a&f and my manager, amazing dude, showed me The Game, at B&N.... after page 10 i was hooked.

Read the game in a week or two, high lighted sections, re read, and re read again, brain washed it into me. I couldn't help but talk it to every day people who didn't get the words i was using. I was now 19 and i had lived the good little boy life. Never drank, smoked, partied, cheated on girls... i did shit by the book and blah blah blah.

Then obviously that thing happened to me, The Game came into my life, And i started partying like no other, drinking, keeping 3 to 4 girls on the fence for 2 weeks at a time and rotating them in and out. I felt like a fuckin G! but i still had a hole that was empty and beatin it up every other night with either a new chick or the same one for 2 weeks and ditchin it wasn't fillin that hole. So i tried goin back to Dating, dating like month, 2 month relationships, gettin to know them, sex was a must though, didn't waste my time, and met some amazing girls, good stories, nice chicks, i just programmed my head they weren't the one for me...

I sweet talked game that wasn't in the book that should have been, i even had girls saying they fell in love with me... girls that were older and had their own places and could get men older and richer than me and i still loved with my parents cause i had just graduated... I didn't get it. My 2 year relationship is fucked up, but i can convince girls that are 22, 23, one that was 21 and mainly around those numbers, to fall in love with me and want me more than life... but i didn't want them. So i was confused as all hell with what to do about my "love/sex/relationship/women/ what ever the fuck you wanna call it" life...

So i took a break for a 2 or 3 months, got out of that house, got into college, and now it seems every girl i actually LIKE, that i think i could have something good with, and she likes me, it gets messed up and doesnt work out, either i'm too busy with football, school, or work, or they would be too busy with school, cheer leading, work, w/e you think... but the girls i didn't want anything long term with, the ones i'd sweet talk, run game on hard core, wanted me, craved me, called none stop and they saw i was playing game and being a complete fuckin pimp, i didn't want to be with them and they wanted to be with me... in the bf/gf type way.

I seem to care too much for girls i like and fuck shit up.
or I chunk the deuce to the girls that were tip drills and they wanted me.

I'm confused as all hell with women, even after reading The Game.
I'm not confused getting them, i honestly never had a problem getting them and fucking like bunnies with w/e target i picked, it's the feelings i got afterwards.

Is there something im missing you guys know or have that i dont???

When i start off with a girl, im too shy, (if i like them) i dont move in at the right times, i fuck up smooth opportunities, i push it too far with emotions (not sex, i know when to lay that on em ;] ) i just... do things... bad.

I'm now 20 and still have problems talking to girls the way i want to, and it seems im constantly remembering my 2yr and i guess subconsciously fuck my self up by saying i cant do that how can i do this.

Well i doubt that made sense to anyone. If anyone understands anything i said or what im trying to get at, hit me up, lemme know, any "comments and suggestion" on what i should do would be nice...

Questions:

What should i do about my 2yr when i think of it and get something good going?

Do you guys see anything wrong off the bat, or need to know anymore to make your "professional PUA" analysis?

to give a description about me so you can put a pic to the player...
6'0, 185lbs, hazel eyes, play college football, bench 225x5, squat 415, pretty well built, good looking 20 yr old, tan, shop at a&f, hollister, AE, shit like that... over all it's not my looks, not to be too cocky but im a very good looking 20 yr with well built body and pretty cute from what im told, it's my head is what's the problem, what goes on inside of it...

any help would be appreciated and taken note of...

thanks alot.

Cris.

[Finesse]

The "game" does that to you.

Eventually you'll find the middle road man.

Some things I've noticed are:

- People have a way of living up, or down, to your expectations of them. (If all else fails, assume she'll be faithful/pleasant/etc..)

- I copy an exceprt from "Reframing - by Bandler"

A very old Chinese Taoist story describes a farmer in a poor country
village. He was considered very well-to-do, because he owned a horse
which he used for plowing and for transportation. One day his horse
ran away. All his neighbors exclaimed how terrible this was, but the
farmer simply said "Maybe."
A few days later the horse returned and brought two wild horses with
it. The neighbors all rejoiced at his good fortune, but the farmer just
said "Maybe."
The next day the farmer's son tried to ride one of the wild horses; the
horse threw him and broke his leg. The neighbors all offered their
sympathy for his misfortune, but the farmer again said "Maybe."
The next week conscription officers came to the village to take
young men for the army. They rejected the farmer's son because of his
broken leg. When the neighbors told him how lucky he was, the farmer
replied "Maybe." . . .
The meaning that any event has depends upon the "frame" in which
we perceive it. When we change the frame, we change the meaning.
Having two wild horses is a good thing until it is seen in the context of
the son's broken leg. The broken leg seems to be bad in the context of
peaceful village life; but in the context of conscription and war, it
suddenly becomes good.
This is called reframing: changing the frame in which a person
perceives events in order to change the meaning. When the meaning
changes, the person's responses and behaviors also change.

[The Lisenby Effect]

k i guess i'm slow but please tell me where it relates to my post, i mean i'm sure it does, i kinda see it, i'm just not there with ya man...

[Smirks]

What Fin is trying to say is that things go a certain way because that's how you view it. Change how you view life and the events that you experience and change the outcome. That's my take on it, at least.

[Finesse]

What Fin is trying to say is that things go a certain way because that's how you view it. Change how you view life and the events that you experience and change the outcome. That's my take on it, at least.

Yup.

[The Lisenby Effect]

gotcha, thanks alot.

I'm the type if i tell my self that long enough, i'll believe it, so i'll keep saying that and thinkin of it and bringing up scenarios to use it in and i'm sure it will work, thanks alot.

[Finesse]

gotcha, thanks alot.

I'm the type if i tell my self that long enough, i'll believe it, so i'll keep saying that and thinkin of it and bringing up scenarios to use it in and i'm sure it will work, thanks alot.

Np

[Smirks]

I was thinking about this while driving to work just now, and I think if you start looking at your interactions with these women you speak of slightly different you'll get some surprising results. What I mean is don't look at a girl you currently think of as just a "fuck and forget" type as just that, and don't look at these girls you put on a pedestal as "perfect." Find a place some where in between and treat 90% of them that way and you might get more out of a relationship w/ a fuck buddy, and better luck with the ones you think you could do some serious stuff with. Wish ya luck

[playercool]

Interesting post. Even a more interesting reply. Very nice Finesse and Smirks.

Here is my take.

Your young. Do you have any idea what you want your end goal to be? Without this you will float around doing god knows what never finding happiness. Figure out what you want. If you want to find a wife fine. If you just want a billion FB's fine. If you just want a girlfriend fine. Just figure it out and put it down on paper.

Your girl cheated and you got mad at the guy. Unless this guy was your friend tell yourself you were wrong. I will tell you right now about 99% of guys out there would have done the same thing this guy did. I am not going to say he acted correctly he just did what most would do. ie: It was her fault not his. If this doesn't rest on your conscience you might want to figure out why not.

It sounds like this all happened a while back. Clearly you are still not over your ex. I feel for you on this one. That has to be tuff to cope with. I got over my ex by doing what you are doing now. It helped me immensely. Is this girl in your life still? If she is it will be very hard to break away cleanly and get past her. If she is in your life at all figure out how to stop this. Even if you go look at her myspace page quit...QUIT. It will help.

Why are girls falling in love with you? Are you spitting retarted ass lies? You might want to start rethinking what you are telling them. Why make any FB fall in love? That is pointless. It will not help you at all ecspecially if they are lies. I am speculating here so correct me if I am wrong. I just had a friend who used to do this and all his relationships were built on a house of cards. How do you think they all ended?

I'm now 20 and still have problems talking to girls the way i want to, and it seems im constantly remembering my 2yr and i guess subconsciously fuck my self up by saying i cant do that how can i do this.

This comes from experience. And even with experience it doesn't mean you will land the girl you really want. But it will certainly help in your pursuits. This is a very hard game. Sure laying them isn't the hardest part. It is keeping the girl you really want. That is why I made some presumptions up above. Even if they were wrong remember it. You tell some lies to build attraction and they will eventually filter out.

Goodluck

[dubya]

Your young. Do you have any idea what you want your end goal to be? Without this you will float around doing god knows what never finding happiness. Figure out what you want. If you want to find a wife fine. If you just want a billion FB's fine. If you just want a girlfriend fine. Just figure it out and put it down on paper.

Fuck girls I would agree to this about most of your life.

Whats the point of knowing how to get what you want if you don't know what it is you want?