The biggest error you can make on a sarge is...

[Alphagame]

I went out sarging yesterday and only had a few beers. It was essentially, my first "sober" sarge ever.

It was very eye opening and I think I learned something that isn't stressed very much in the pick-up materials I've read over the last 7 or 8 months, since stumbling onto the seduction community.

First, let me tell you about Brian. Brian is a slightly overweight college educated guy. He doesn't work out. He's just a normal guy, really. He doesn't get to go out much because he's been living with his girlfriend for the last 6 years or so. He gets a night out with the guys about twice a year, I'd guess.

Anyway, the thing about Brian is, he's pretty successful with women in the bars, especially considering that he never gets to practice and stay fresh, the way a normal single guy would. I started connecting the dots about a year ago, but after thinking about my first sober sarge yesterday, I think I know for certain why Brian is so successful.

Brian has never sudied pick-up, he doesn't know anything about qualification or isolation or venue changes... this stuff is all foreign to him. But what Brian does do well is carry conversation. I mean, with a normal friend, I can call them up, tell them we're meeting at Fox & Hound tonight and it's a 4 minute phone call. Not with Brian. If I get Brian on the phone, it's a minimum one hour call. It's never a boring conversation, but I know before I call that it's gonna be an hour call, so I never call the poor guy.

That said, yesterday, I was just in a great conversational mood. I mean, it was almost abnormal for me. I was just talking and talking about anything and everything. When I finally opened my first set, I carried solid conversation for 6 or 7 hours somehow. I mean, there was never a single lull in the conversation at all. It was just me and these two. No wing to help me out. Amazingly, this was a 2-set of girls and I didn't get cock-bocked either. It ended up being a F-Close.

Ok, we all know, low levels of comfort, plus a number close equals voice mail with no return call. We've even created a five minute rule...don't run off with the number until you've at least hung out with her for 5 minutes after number closing.

Why is it that women are screening to voice mail in low comfort situations?

Ok, we've also got buyer's remorse, which is basically the same thing. We meet a chick right before closing time, we're very drunk, they're probably drunk, the conversation doesn't last very long, but there's a great make-out session and then her friends cock-block. We know this girl is attracted to us, but she also screens to voice mail.

Again, low comfort levels and voice mail. But kino was great, IOI's were great. All other lights were green, but we're screened to voice mail.

I'm starting to think that perhaps, it's not that she's got so many other options in her life or that she's not sexually attracted and she's not embarrassed...it's that she's abso-fucking-lutely petrified.

Ok, think about it. I've been through this scenario a million times. I know I carry better conversation after a beer or two (or least I used to think I did) so this is what I was doing. After a number close with a girl, with low comfort levels, I'd drink a Corona before I called her. I'd get all worked up. What am I gonna say? What are we gonna talk about? What if she's not impressed with the way I come across on the phone? Finally, using logic, I figure if I never call her, I'll definitely never see her again because she's not gonna call me.

So I get all worked up, make the call and low and behold, I'm screened to voice mail. I leave my message, call a day later, same thing and of course she never calls back.

Here's the thing I'm starting to theorize: She's more petrified of making a bad first impression than you are. She doesn't know when that first phone call is gonna come. She can't slam down a Corona just before you call. So instead, she takes the path of least resistence: She doesn't answer.

I've had women call me before. It doesn't happen often, but when it does, I can hear it in their voices. They're afraid of something. They're afraid of me thinking that they didn't carry conversation very well. They're afraid that they're not gonna make a very good impression.

It's kind of like stage fright, in a sense.

I think women are more petrified of that uncomfortable lull in the conversation with a potential mate than anything else in the world. I don't like it, but I think for women, it must be like 10X more painful.

Now think about all their past experiences with men. How many men can actually carry good conversation with a woman? I'm guessing over 90% of their experiences with first dates and first phone calls have been unpleasant. And for women, what is unpleasant for us might be WAY WAY WAY VERY UNPLEASANT for them. Remember, they're WAY more emotional than we are.

So anyway, about the thing I learned yesterday, for the bulk of the 6 hour sarge, I was dominating the conversation the entire time. I somehow kept them both interested in me for 6 hours through nothing more than good conversation and some good kino. At one point, the target, teasingly, told me that I talk too much and that I should talk less. She was teasing, but I decided to go along, so I shut up for little while and let them talk. Sure enough, the three of us had our first lull in the conversation where no one knew what to say. I stuck my finger in the air, circled it around and said "Ok, baaaack to me" and just kept talking.

So that's it. I think the number one error men make when meeting women is allowing a lull in the conversation. It's uncomfortable for us, but I think for women, it must be a lot worse than we can imagine. They're feeling pressure to come up with their portion of conversation flow too, but they can't and they're embarrassed far worse than we can imagine. That's why they're so turned off by typical interview questions when AFC's open and start asking "What do you do, where are from?" They already know that if that's all he can think of, the lull in the conversation is right around the corner so they start turning their backs and picking up their purses and acting like bitches. It's better, in their minds, to do that, than to play along with all the questions only to be confronted with the inevitable lull in the conversation, where it's revealed that she can't come up with anything interesting to say either.