Beating out the competition....

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Beating out the competition....

Postby Fuzz » Wed Jan 02, 2008 3:30 pm

Okay, this has come up only a few times, but what to do when your target is clearly interested (or only possibly interested) in another man? Not necessarily a boy friend, but just another guy at the venue. I've read up a lot on this but I'd like to hear some of your real world experiences.

A few situations I've encountered:

On two separate occasions different targets were going off about a guy who wasn't paying them enough attention to them. In one instance, the guy wouldn't call her back. In the other, he was there, but he was talking to some other girls. I though jumping in and saying "What an asshole" would be a bad idea. Instead, I took the guy's side. "Why does he have to be the one to call you all the time?" or "Why should he be paying all this attention to you?" and "You know, it goes both ways." It also helped that I genuinely felt this way -- the guy shouldn't have to chase after the girl all the time. In one of those instances, I think it helped, in the other ....well the verdict is sill out. Or it might have been inconsequential either way.

Another thing I find myself doing is that when a girl brings up some guy, especially someone who I feel is a threat, I say "Oh he's very nice, I like him." This shows that I'm not jealous. On one occasion, target started begrudgingly talking shit about the guy after I had said he was really cool, making her look like the asshole.
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Re: Beating out the competition....

Postby Westfall » Wed Jan 02, 2008 4:13 pm

Fuzz wrote:Okay, this has come up only a few times, but what to do when your target is clearly interested (or only possibly interested) in another man? Not necessarily a boy friend, but just another guy at the venue. I've read up a lot on this but I'd like to hear some of your real world experiences.


I'm in a posty mood. The idealized image in this girls head is far more attractive than the reality. Bring the guy into your set and then wait for him to fuck up and start losing attraction. You can also help his demise in her eyes along.

WF: Hey, what do you think of my friend, she's pretty hott isn't she?

This will look to her like you're trying to help her out and you can quite easily trip the guy up by making him show way too much interest while paiting him in an AFC frame. Everything he does, you frame as AFC. As he falls apart she will be wondering why you're not into her.

WF: Don't be so shy. it's obvious you like her, ask her out.

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Postby playercool » Wed Jan 02, 2008 8:21 pm

As we all know him talking to other women is doing what? It's making her even more attracted to him. Your competition is playing the game extremely well it sounds like to me. It is insane how much jealousy makes a girl go crazy. Are you sure this guy isn't part of the game?

WF mentions bring the guy into your set. I would say this will work 50% of the time. Keep in mind if a girl is into you at some point you have to start showing her IOI's or SOI's. If he agrees with you that she is hot well this might just make her even want him more. You really need to know her personality before you do this. Does she hear she is hot all the time? Or does she rarely hear it? If she rarely hears it she is going to be eating it up from this guy. Keep in mind by asking this question you are also calling her hot. In fact sorry WF I have to totally disagree on this now that I am writing this out. You are going all AFC by calling her hot and asking him to agree. He is the one who looks like a badass. He gets to call her hot without even calling her hot if you know what I mean.

Here is how I would play it. I would say similar to what you said. Yah that guy is hot we totally need to hook u up with him. Right here you showed ZERO interest in her. In the back of her head she is thinking WTF is this guy gay? If not why would he want to set me up with someone else why not him? Alright now I would ask how jealous are you that he is talking to those other girls? She will tell the truth or lie but the answer is she is way jealous. Tell her well you should give it right back to him. Make him jealous that you are messing with another guy. Be her partner in crime. Like the saying goes you have to be willing to lose the girl to ge the girl. That is precisely what you are doing here. So you two start dancing being flirty with each other in front of this guy. Yes he might start getting into her but who cares. There is an equal chance she will start getting into you. While all this is going on make sure you are running some A2 questions. You both will most likely be somewhat isolated(at least paired up).

Do you think it's possible you are only into these girls because they aren't into you? Think about it.

Goodluck,

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Postby Fuzz » Wed Jan 02, 2008 11:07 pm

playercool wrote:Do you think it's possible you are only into these girls because they aren't into you? Think about it.


No, because they seem to be into me. One of them, I was not into at all, but used as practice, but ultimately I wanted to put her in the friend zone and use her as a pivot. The other girl I sense likes me sometimes. Likewise I change my mind about her all the time. Basically I think she's probably too conservative for my tastes. Nevertheless, practice makes perfect.

I think it's possible for girls to like more than one guy at a time. Logically they must choose one, but emotionally, they can be all over the place. Also, I think they can like more than one guy but in varying degrees (i.e. one guy better than the other).
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Postby Westfall » Thu Jan 03, 2008 9:12 am

As we all know him talking to other women is doing what? It's making her even more attracted to him.


Unless you frame it as though he is being AFC.

WF mentions bring the guy into your set. I would say this will work 50% of the time. Keep in mind if a girl is into you at some point you have to start showing her IOI's or SOI's. If he agrees with you that she is hot well this might just make her even want him more. You really need to know her personality before you do this. Does she hear she is hot all the time? Or does she rarely hear it? If she rarely hears it she is going to be eating it up from this guy.


Actually, it will work nearly 100% of the time If you--knowing the game, keep framing everything he does as AFC--keep spiking his comfort, and get him qualifying to you, her attraction for this guy will drop off a cliff. Ex:

WF: Do you think my friend is hott?
Guy: Yes
WF (hand on shoulder): Alright mate, I'm going to let you chat with my friend, but she's like my lil sister so I gotta make sure you're good enough for her. What do you do? (or what makes you worthy of her?----Or my favorite....Why don't you buy her a drink....hell me too, I get a finder's fee!)

If he's into her, he not knowing the game is going to qualify, and spike his comfort though the roof. If he's not into her, she'll be knocked down a few pegs & feeling rejected...and needing validaiton, and you just DHV'd by communicating disinterest and being social.

Keep in mind by asking this question you are also calling her hot. You are going all AFC by calling her hot and asking him to agree. He is the one who looks like a badass. He gets to call her hot without even calling her hot if you know what I mean.


You're not calling her hot. You are baiting him to fuck-up. If you really thought she were hot, you'd NOT be trying to give her away. If he calls her hot, especially without knowing her, he's going to drop his value down, but once you get him qualifying it's all over for him. Additionally, you're in control of the frame.

Alright now I would ask how jealous are you that he is talking to those other girls? She will tell the truth or lie but the answer is she is way jealous. Tell her well you should give it right back to him. Make him jealous that you are messing with another guy. Be her partner in crime.


I might be wrong, but I would suspect that a woman would see though this as a lame attempt to makeout with her, by manipulating her and playing off of her jealousy. And even if she does make out with you she's only doing it not out of attration for you, but in an attempt to make another guy jealous.

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Postby Smirks » Thu Jan 03, 2008 9:25 am

I'm gonna go with WF on this one. I did basically the same thing on NYE.

At a party and I spot my target...shortly thereafter...a guy more muscular than myself made it pretty obvious to me that he was in to her as well. I started talking to both, suggested that he feed her some of the food they had at the party (he was standing in front of it) eventually he kind of disappeared off in to the crowd. I think he started to feel like he was my puppet of sorts?
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Postby Finesse » Thu Jan 03, 2008 1:07 pm

i like afcadamlondons approach.
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Postby El Fenix » Thu Jan 03, 2008 1:23 pm

The "thumbs up- way to go!" is a classic. Wish I'd thought of it. Also, overly complimenting the guy who's barging in helps too. It's counter-intuitive, but it works.
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Postby Finesse » Thu Jan 03, 2008 1:25 pm

you could always just talk about your nipples......
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Postby Bull Run » Thu Jan 03, 2008 5:48 pm

El Fenix wrote:The "thumbs up- way to go!" is a classic. Wish I'd thought of it. Also, overly complimenting the guy who's barging in helps too. It's counter-intuitive, but it works.


This is the way to go when someone interupts your set or you see an initial approach from a competitor.

BUT, when you open a set in which the girl is talking about another guy at the venue that she already KNOWS it'd say the best thing to do is to be playful with her, tease her for being insecure, passively take his side in the matter (use generalities instead of specifically stating that you are with him), then eject or bring a different target (not attached to another guy) into the interaction. Why make things hard on yourself by competing with a guy that obviously has subtantially higher value than you? If he didn't she would never have mentioned him to you.

Competing in this situation is a form of supplicating and the girl will eat up your game as she feels some type of emotion towards him. If her emotional energy isn't being directed to you, you aren't getting anywhere.

One of my theories regarding sarging is efficiency. My goal is to go into a set without expectation of an outcome, engage the group, pay attention for IOIs, keep it fun and light, then if there's no bites eject. I'll definitely swing by later if the interaction was positive.

I'm not going to waste my game trying to convince a girl that clearly has a high level of interest in a competitor at the venue that she should be with me instead of him. A lot of PU is recognizing what type of person is going to be drawn to you and then running game on them. Even the masters acknowledge that they won't create attraction 100% of the time. We've had discussions regarding venue selection theory and its impact on your game, the same holds true for target selection...note that target selection isn't based on physical appearance instead its based on their story and personality, both of which you should get a feel for very quickly in the interaction.
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