Flaked on....

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Thought I'd post this here and get some feedback. I've had this girl in my sights for a very long time now, and she's turned into this almost impossible challenge. Nevertheless, I want to conquer her, and I still think I can. It started almost a year ago. Met her at a bar, number closed. Had a day 2 a few days later where I went to her place, where we got totally naked and did everything just short of coital intercourse. No f-close. For the next month or so, we texted back and forth, and had a few more dates. I'd always end up at her place, but each time she'd put up more physical resistance than the last time. Then she became really flakey. I got tired of the situation and cut off contact with her for a few months.

She re-opens me many months later to invite me to her birthday party. I agree to go, but on the morning of the party, I cancel on her. I accidentally bump into her a week later at a bar, and she is pissed. She tells me she never wants to see me again, and at one point asks why I don't want to be her boyfriend. I tell her she doesn't want a boyfriend (which I think is true). Eventually we make out, and she asks me to go home with her. I decline because I'm there (I think unbeknownst to her) with another girl, and thought it would be bad form.

We text sparsely, with my being very cold toward her, thinking to myself that I didn't want to game her anymore. Last Thursday, out of the blue, I decide to re-open her:

ME: Did you join the peace corp or something? I haven't seen you in forever.

HB: Haha no, I did just get back from san francisco though. How are you?

ME: Weird I was on the west coast recently too. LA -- Very fun.

HB: so weird! What were you doing there? Sanfran was awesomeeeeee

ME: Vacation. That, and the unveiling of my star on hollywood blvd. :P

(many hours pass)

HB: You should come to [bar x]!

(I miss this text. I write back in the morning)

ME: Woulda come if i didn't have to be up for work so early. Another time.

(I decide not to write her back until next week, but then the next night I get a very late night text. I am pretty drunk too.)

HB: Come to [bar x]!

ME: Just came from there, silly. We have to coordinate these invites a little better.

HB: No way! I was working till late!

ME: I was at [bar x], but now i'm almost home. What are you doing tomorrow?

HB: Oh lame! I live like 5 mins from it lol

HB: Tomorrow I'm just working, you?

ME: My friend is having a b-day pool party, and also, I hafta shop for a computer.

HB: Haha don't have too much fun

HB: Let me know if you end up at [bar x]

(the next afternoon)

ME: How was your night, binge drinker?

HB: Haha very interesting. Life is so exciting.

HB: What's your sign?

ME: What do you think my sign is? :)

HB: Aquarius!

ME: No darling, it's libra. Why'd you guess aquarius?

HB: Have you ever done your birthchart?

HB: I thought Aquarius because you seem floaty like me

HB: Libra! Hmm

ME: I've never done a birth chart. I was gonna guess that you were either aquarius or pisces. Leaning toward aquarius.

HB: I'll do your birthchart for you!

ME: Ok, how?

HB: It's easy I just need to know ur birth date place and time

ME: (I give her the info)

HB: Got your chart!

HB: You're and interesting one

ME: You're such a little fortune teller. ;) Do you do tarot readings too? I had one done last winter. It was enlightening.

HB: :D yes I am! No tarot, I'm more into astrology, palmstry and numerology, they all give me the same answers!

(many hours later)

ME: Hey miss psychic, heading to jacuzzi party now. Might swing by [bar x] later. Let me know if you're around and we can be 'floaty' together.

HB: Haha yes I will be floaty around [bar x] today

I do not leave the party until very late. When I get to the bar she is not there. I text her with "Off to [bar x]." I go to the bar next door and see one of her friends and say hi. I do a quick look around to see if she is there too, but I don't find her. I go back to the other bar. Basically, I hung out until an hour or so after I sent out that last text and she didn't show, so I go home. Perhaps I was expecting too much, so I feel as though I was flaked on, but my invite was pretty wishy washy admittedly. Inner game bruised, but hopefully I did not lose value. Not sure what the next step should be. Reading this back right now, I can already spot some glaring mistakes in my text game.

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Appreciate the feedback. The thing is, she's flaked on me many times before, and though it is true she has a job that keeps her insanely busy, part of me can't help but think she just wants someone to chase after her for purposes of self-validation. It should also be noted that she is into power games, and at her job she bosses men around on a regular basis. That, and I hear from friends that she changes her mind a lot and has crushes on lots of different people.

I may be overgaming her, but I think that if I told her to meet up with me, point blank, she would probably flake. I'd like to move the relationship out of texting, but I have no idea how.

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[QUOTE=grimm1111;37095]The problem is not in your text game anyway.[/QUOTE]

Just curious, what exactly did you mean by "over-gaming" then?

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I don't know her from work. I am kinda friends with a few people who used to work with/under her. None of them do anymore. I wouldn't call this a social circle thing.

The first time she invited me out, I really couldn't go because I missed the text and had to be up early. The second time, I guess I could have gone , but I was already almost home, and it would've been a pain to turn all the way around and drive back just for her.

And seriously thanks again for your input so far.

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