by crow » Mon Jan 20, 2014 10:59 am
I agree with triumvirate, and I'll add another reason .
The temptation to date those in close proximity is natural. We interact with coworkers on breaks or casually during the day, and we develop a personal connection with them--at least, that's ideal in an office setting. The attractive female coworker is an easy target for daydreams and what-ifs, and those idle thoughts start to feel important--maybe this is real attraction, maybe she's right for me--and the fact that we know it's a bad idea paradoxically adds to the appeal.
But the warning against dating coworkers, which may well be in your company's HR policy, is borne from experience. 99% of your relationships will end, and you don't want the anxiety and hassle of being around an ex at work. Moreover, coworker dating makes for really bizarre grapevine exaggerations.
There are some cases where it turns out well, but they're rare.
And that goes to the reason I want to add. You should be directing your attention to strangers while you're getting your initiation skills together. Daydream about going to a venue with girls in it. Daydream about "expendable" relationships. You need room to make mistakes, now, you know? The real fear is that you'll get so happy getting attention from your office crush that you won't be as enthusiastic about new women.
So, in a nutshell, don't just not date the coworker, push the idea as far out of your mind as possible.
I will say this, though: she might make for one helluva pivot . . .