Continued cold approach/gaming while dating a girl?

[Guest]

I have gotten pretty consistent at game (although I admit I am no master) and have gotten bored of cold approach and casual sex.

I recently met a girl I really like hanging out with and am pushing for a traditional LTR with. We had sex on our second date and have been on 5 dates. It seems like she is pretty into me and I have been laying down the LTR frames consistently but making sure to keep them subtle.

From those who have been in this situation, would you recommend continued cold approach to keep up my skills or would you completely shut that off (other than bantering with people which is natural for me now). I live in a college town with about 25,000 students, the majority of which are in greek houses. In other words, many people know each other. I am not interested in meeting new girls but I am in the "relationship undefined" area right now and would hate to fuck it up by approaching someone this girl knows just to keep my skills sharp.

[Guest]

Shoulda read this one before your last post I guess haha. Why are you worried about 'the talk' if you want a LTR with her?

Can't answer from being in the situation other than that until you've had 'the talk' and are official, you're not official and you shouldn't worry too much about running game still. You can still practice without picking up, but you'll probably just have to tone down the sexual stuff some cuz I know that's how you roll :) If she doesn't already know it, I'd also find a good way to relate to her that you're a very flirty person in general and you like to go out so if she hears something from someone else you can say you told her you were a flirty person. Tell her you like to flirt but if you're in a LTR you're serious and wouldn't cheat even if you did. I guess that's something you'd have to bring up at the point you had 'the talk.' ;)

[Guest]

From your other posts and this, it sounds like you are not with this women out of scarcity or inability to date/FB.

If you are [i]genuinely [/i]interested in an exclusive LTR with this girl that you [i]want[/i] to be in... focus on developing a quality relationship. It doesn't mean game ends, it just changes. All the self improvement aspects that make you a cash money millionaire in the original pickup (ie, confidence, frame control, leading, etc) you will be(or should be!) exercising non-stop as the LTR develops so plenty of opportunities to still be applying community principals.

But i'd recommend from past experience, if you still have that itch to game/worried about cold approach skills, you may be better off holding off nailing down an exclusive LTR. Life is too short, you can chew up years hanging out in exclusive LTRs when you still have that itch to be out there.... when in retrospect those exclusive LTR should have been framed up as a mLTR (knowing what i know now)

[Guest]

I'd recommend keeping your skills sharp. However you are in a pretty small market to run game like you have in the past. You can still approach and strike up conversations, however you are going to have to tone it down some or eventually you'll get caught.

Don't stop doing the things you did to attract this girl in the first place.

[Guest]

Is she going to stop getting hit on by guys?

I wouldn't stop approaching and even taking girls out until you guys have had the "talk". Until you are exclusive all is fair.

Also if you are good at game you won't lose your skills. After this LTR passes you will jump right back into the saddle and be good with women.

[Guest]

I think the question is a bit of an oxymoron.

If you hold to the idea that the point of game is to become naturally attractive at all times, to have internalized game to the point that you 'run' it all the time, then you will always be 'gaming' women.

I understand that's a bit philosophical, but give it some thought.

Howie already echoed this sentiment, but I think it's important to reiterate. Don't stop doing the things that attracted her to you. Even if that means that you talk to other girls.

I have an LTR. We're very open about my past and the Community. I still talk to other girls all the time. The only difference now is that I have ZERO intent to escalate the interaction.

Finally, if you ascribe to the indirect game strategy, the girl you're talking with should have no idea that you're 'gaming' her.

[Guest]

[quote1233789981=Bull Run]
I think the question is a bit of an oxymoron.

If you hold to the idea that the point of game is to become naturally attractive at all times, to have internalized game to the point that you 'run' it all the time, then you will always be 'gaming' women.

I understand that's a bit philosophical, but give it some thought.

Howie already echoed this sentiment, but I think it's important to reiterate. Don't stop doing the things that attracted her to you. Even if that means that you talk to other girls.

I have an LTR. We're very open about my past and the Community. I still talk to other girls all the time. The only difference now is that I have ZERO intent to escalate the interaction.

Finally, if you ascribe to the indirect game strategy, the girl you're talking with should have no idea that you're 'gaming' her.
[/quote1233789981]

I concur. Very oxymoronish indeed.

[Guest]

Of course I will naturally be bantering with and flirting with girls. It is part of my personality now. I was more referring to cold approach. I think I will probably just still talk to girls but keep it platonic and fun instead of sexual. Great comments here, thanks guys!

[Guest]

Wow! Awesome thread.

The danger for Sal, and any of us who get into LTR's, is falling into the rut of not approaching. It's such an easy thing to do. I figure most of us are all pretty naturally shy, especially with women, and that's what ultimately led all of us to this forum.

Sal, it sounds like you are already fabricating excuses to not approach women. Small town, lots of greeks who know one another, it may get back to her. I can relate. I know what you are thinking. I think at the end of the day, inner game and inner strength is what it takes to continue doing those things without fear of her seeing or hearing about it. 99% of your approaches, she'll never even know about. But do you have a strong enough frame to stand up for your actions if/when she calls you on it?

++++Is she going to stop getting hit on by guys?++++

EXACTLY! This will go on for the rest of her life until she gets really old and really ugly. Meanwhile, if you allow AA to take root...what kind of a deal is that???