We are born alone, We will die alone, and a lot of life we will be alone. We make new friends, have fun with them, keep some around, some leave. You have old friends, then you need to make new friends. You find a girl, things don't work out well, she leaves you. You move onto the next one. You get married, are married for 20 years and then she leaves you and takes half of everything. You are back to square one. What is the one thing that you had through all of these dilemmas? Yourself. You are the only one that will be there for you no matter what.
Some people will leave you for minor things, some more major (friends and women will leave your life for various reasons). I have been thinking a bit about emotions and inner game and how they are connected. I am building my inner game up right now so I have been examining this for a bit. I went through a big one-ities about 3 months back and what caused this? I have seen a few guys in the community get wrapped up in a girl, in that "one special girl". They feel like she is above all the other girls and it will be hard to get another similar to her (I think we all go through this at some point, maybe even multiple points).
There are a ton of girls out there, but even if there were not, you are the only one that will always be there for you. Things may be great now, in a week, a year, or a decade. But they may not always be. I am writing this mostly as a reminder to me to stay away from needy territory, but I also hope it helps some others out too. I believe that you get hooked on one girl because you think she brings some sort of value to your life. If we can find out what it is that a "special" girl is adding to our experience here, and fill that ourselves, I believe we can be content. We won't mind if we lose her, because we feel complete already. So, if I approach this girl a couple rows over from me, or if I never get a text back from Amy, or if I just royally fuck it up with Amanda because I didn't play the game correctly. It shouldn't matter, because she won't be there in the end, I will be, and that's all that should matter. When we start getting one-itis and worrying if we will get that girl (outcome dependence) we have placed too much value onto her, we have placed more value on her than you have on yourself. You, yourself should be the thing with the most value, not a girl because shes hot or has a great personality or both. You should always put the most amount of value on yourself because you are the most important and will ALWAYS be there in the end.
Well, that is my ramblings for now, just my thoughts laid out there and a reminder to myself why it really does not matter what the outcome is.
Dallas PUA
The Pickup Artist Playground
We are all alone
20 posts
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by Guest » Mon Feb 02, 2009 7:48 pm
Paragraphs...
Geeze Justus that was hard to read.
In the end you will be alone. Hrmm not if you find a girl who holds the same values as you and you live happily ever after. (I don't believe in divorce). Yes I choose to live in my own fairy world until proven otherwise.
I have told you before that I am totally contempt with being alone. In fact a lot of times I like to just have the house to myself and no one over. I will say though a woman can provide things that you can't get yourself. With that said I will try my damndest to find a badass girl.
Geeze Justus that was hard to read.
In the end you will be alone. Hrmm not if you find a girl who holds the same values as you and you live happily ever after. (I don't believe in divorce). Yes I choose to live in my own fairy world until proven otherwise.
I have told you before that I am totally contempt with being alone. In fact a lot of times I like to just have the house to myself and no one over. I will say though a woman can provide things that you can't get yourself. With that said I will try my damndest to find a badass girl.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Feb 02, 2009 7:57 pm
[quote1233622516=playercool]
I have told you before that I am totally contempt with being alone. In fact a lot of times I like to just have the house to myself and no one over.
[/quote1233622516]
I think that's a great quality. I seem to always want to be hanging out with someone or doing something. I probably just need work on my identity.
And I made paragraphs for you, you are so high maintenance. Lol.
I have told you before that I am totally contempt with being alone. In fact a lot of times I like to just have the house to myself and no one over.
[/quote1233622516]
I think that's a great quality. I seem to always want to be hanging out with someone or doing something. I probably just need work on my identity.
And I made paragraphs for you, you are so high maintenance. Lol.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Feb 02, 2009 8:43 pm
I enjoy a girl jus before and during sex. all other times, i really just enjoy the persuit of them. Summary:keep your feet off the furniture.
thats not entirely true, as I reallly enjoy a woman who can make me laugh or does the occasional random act for me. I like the fantasies that play in my mind when I am around them, even if they never play out, which they usually never do, but oh well. Variety is the spice of life, and no one woman can provide variety for me.
Guys are great to keep around. Compared to women a convo with a guy on a basic level is like having a conversation with yourself. it makes sense. YOu have pool partner, wing, drinking buddy, and the other guy never turns anything down out of dislike. Whereas a girl would say, I hate bowling or pool, or beer. But friends do split as they find out more about themselves and each other.
I was a fosterkid so I have the firsthand knowledge that even your family wont always be there for you. You will have what you make for yourself and that is it.
thats not entirely true, as I reallly enjoy a woman who can make me laugh or does the occasional random act for me. I like the fantasies that play in my mind when I am around them, even if they never play out, which they usually never do, but oh well. Variety is the spice of life, and no one woman can provide variety for me.
Guys are great to keep around. Compared to women a convo with a guy on a basic level is like having a conversation with yourself. it makes sense. YOu have pool partner, wing, drinking buddy, and the other guy never turns anything down out of dislike. Whereas a girl would say, I hate bowling or pool, or beer. But friends do split as they find out more about themselves and each other.
I was a fosterkid so I have the firsthand knowledge that even your family wont always be there for you. You will have what you make for yourself and that is it.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Feb 02, 2009 9:09 pm
I think you have a pessimistic view on things right now, Just/us.
First off, you aren't born alone. From the moment your fetal body forms the brain, they have proven that there is brain activity directly related to the emotions, audible happenings, and movements of the mother. Then, you are born. You cannot fend for yourself for a very long time...therefore someone tends to you. You aren't alone.
Now, we can get in to the semantics of everyone's personal childhoods, but that just turns in to a pity party. I think it comes down to you being alone if you want to be alone.
You also speak of being with people as a needy tendency. You can be an independent person and still spend most of your time around people...unless you view it like you are who you hang with. That, again, is a personal issue/choice.
If you're wanting to improve your inner game, this is one thing you need to NOT think of. Thinking you're alone is a one way ticket to emo-land. Understanding you can and will do things for yourself is a completely different story...and what you SHOULD focus on.
Cheer up, buttercup : )
First off, you aren't born alone. From the moment your fetal body forms the brain, they have proven that there is brain activity directly related to the emotions, audible happenings, and movements of the mother. Then, you are born. You cannot fend for yourself for a very long time...therefore someone tends to you. You aren't alone.
Now, we can get in to the semantics of everyone's personal childhoods, but that just turns in to a pity party. I think it comes down to you being alone if you want to be alone.
You also speak of being with people as a needy tendency. You can be an independent person and still spend most of your time around people...unless you view it like you are who you hang with. That, again, is a personal issue/choice.
If you're wanting to improve your inner game, this is one thing you need to NOT think of. Thinking you're alone is a one way ticket to emo-land. Understanding you can and will do things for yourself is a completely different story...and what you SHOULD focus on.
Cheer up, buttercup : )
- Guest
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