confidence or insecure?

[Guest]

ok, i tend to be a guy who does not doubt himself to often. but today i openly admitted to not being good at something. im currently under the assumption that a truly confident person will admit to their down falls and a arrogant person will try and hide them. if we as men admit to our weakness does that make us insecure?

[Guest]

Depends on how you did it.

[Guest]

I've always been of the opinion that it's perfectly fine to acknowledge your personal shortcomings.

Announcing those shortcomings to the world is a different story. I personally don't think it's any one else's business what I am or am not good at. There are times when it's absolutely necessary to admit to them, such as in group work at school, work, etc. If you're handed a task that you're not good at doing then you owe it to the group to say something and try to get a task more suited to your skill set. In that scenario it does take a certain level of confidence to say something.

In truth, I'm not sure many people would process it one way or the other. They're probably thinking, well Manead isn't good at xyz but he is good at abc so let's have him do that instead. I don't think they're thinking that you're confident or insecure. If they do, then that's their issue and not yours.

A truly confident person never asks themselves if they are confident. They do what they do and move forward. They don't see things through the lens of confidence or insecurity.

[Guest]

Think about all the things you are personally good at in life. Then think of all the things you are personally not good at in life. What you will come to find out is that most people are good at a few things and suck at a few things. Why hide that fact? Everyone knows damn well they are horrible at some things. I have no problem readily admitting to anyone that I am not good at xyz. Who cares? I don't think anyone will judge you for not being good at something.

I think what you did today was called being human, not necessarily being insecure or confident.

[Guest]

I suck at bowling, but I'm good at shooting pool. Does the fact that I'm admitting that I suck at bowling make me insecure? No, because I don't give a shit.

If they were coming in to shoot the cover of "Bowling Magazine" I still wouldn't give a shit, because I don't think bowling matters, I think it's for pinheads (pun intended).

"Insecure" just means that you don't think you're good enough for other people. Another word for insecure is "externally validated." Insecure people look to others for approval. Confident people tend to be their own judge. That's the difference IMO.

[Guest]

[QUOTE=Bull Run;40481]I've always been of the opinion that it's perfectly fine to acknowledge your personal shortcomings.

Announcing those shortcomings to the world is a different story. I personally don't think it's any one else's business what I am or am not good at. There are times when it's absolutely necessary to admit to them, such as in group work at school, work, etc. If you're handed a task that you're not good at doing then you owe it to the group to say something and try to get a task more suited to your skill set. In that scenario it does take a certain level of confidence to say something.

In truth, I'm not sure many people would process it one way or the other. They're probably thinking, well Manead isn't good at xyz but he is good at abc so let's have him do that instead. I don't think they're thinking that you're confident or insecure. If they do, then that's their issue and not yours.

A truly confident person never asks themselves if they are confident. They do what they do and move forward. They don't see things through the lens of confidence or insecurity.[/QUOTE]

i kind of said it in front of the whole class. i said i was not good at introspection....frankly i did not fully understand myself until i took the Myers-Briggs personality assessment.