opening- the intruder

[RockStar]

So I guess I'm just going to go through the whole approach process and break it all down. if you haven't checked out my other posts on Approaching sets first please do.
overcoming approach anxiety
http://dallaspua.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=3849
physiology of Approaching
http://dallaspua.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=3857

the intruder
So what is “the intruder”? I think it was thundercat who coined this term. The intruder is the first statement out of your mouth. The first step into that bubble of personal space we where just talking about. Some common examples are:
• Hey
• Hi
• Excuse me
• Pardon me
• Yo
• Sup
• Oh My God!
• Listen
Each has their place but some of them not in pick up. Why? Because some set a negative frame that you can get out of but why create more work for yourself? My favorite one off the list is ‘Listen’ because it’s also a bit of an embedded command (more on those later).

So you have subconscious auto responses that are these filters in your brain called MetaPrograms. These MetaPrograms are based on past experiences and common societal themes and allow you to act in accordance with a pre-programmed set of responses that are most likely to spin things in your favor if you don’t have time to think about them.

If you remember the cave man with approach anxiety, that was a MetaProgram designed to create a favorable scenario to survival. I have a fellow PUA who will literally walk across the street to avoid a homeless person asking him for money, not because he can’t say no but because he has two conflicting MetaPrograms in his brain. One says ‘from past experience this guy is going to leech off of me and intrude on my space’ the other says ‘I really should help the poor, that’s how I was raised.’ So when the conflict occurs He has a third MetaProgram that resolves the conflict for him. He bolts and he can continue to function without feeling uncomfortable and the best part. It happens subconsciously for the most part...That’s the social hack we are learning here.
So what we are doing with the ‘intruder’ is creating a scenario where the societal MetaPrograms work in our favor. They must pay attention because that’s what they have been programmed to do in that situation without thinking about it.

So let’s look at a couple of them and see if you can get the hang of what I’m telling you.

Hey- the natural response to hey is attention then “what?” in response. It is a very good intruder.
Excuse me- Excuse me is begging and an avoidance MetaProgram kicks in. While you may have been taught as a child that it is polite (MetaProgram) you are not sarging royalty and your presence does not need to be excused.
Oh MY GOD! – This will get you very acute attention. Gay men use it for attention all the time.

So I hope that this clears things up about ‘intruders’. Use them, but use them in new and different ways, use them to set off auto responses in your targets that work in your favor!

-Rockstar