Any advice for a new guy??

[Nekrus]

Ok I’ve been semi into this for about four months now (since I broke up with my GF of 4 years). I’ve been hanging out with other guys interested in this who have read tons of material and have had various amounts of success themselves. I sort of worked with them to develop an action plan to get me where I want to be (PUA rather than AFC, which I still consider myself despite my own mild successes). Here is the information that would seem to be relevant:

What I’ve Read / Watched / Listened to:

- Savoy's "Magic Bullets" – Seems like solid foundation
- PU101's Kino DVD – Recommended to me but not sure it was worth it
- BradP's Shocker Opener – Despite this I still have minor problems with openings.
- Tyler Durden's Blueprint – Nice reading, more theoretical, inner game based rather than
a how to sort of thing.
- RSD Foundations Superconference CDs – I actually haven’t finished these yet but so far
they seem good. Basically the same stuff from Magic Bullets and Blueprint it would
seem.
- Toecutter's Ebook on Palmistry – Interesting but I’ve not had enough in-field
experience at the comfort building phase to really put this one to much use.
- The Definitive Guide to Body Language by Allan Pease – Very good reading, very
Interesting and informative but not only for PUA, also various business areas that
involve my job.
- The System by Love Doc – Over rated, over-hyped, not worth it IMO.
- The Game by Neal Strauss – Interesting intro to the field but hardly a How-to.

Inner Game

I recently (4 months ago) broke up with my GF of four years. I won’t bore you guys with all the details but it was a hard breakup. That night my friends all got together with me and we developed a sort of action plan to get me over it all. It included working out, lots and lots of activities to keep me busy, meeting as many girls as I could, etc… Before I’ve never been bad per se with women but never really good either. Any way after being out of the game for 4 years even if I was good I’d say there is room for improvement. I’ve been working out and getting my body back in shape (yes I got lazy in the relationship but not that much, and I’ll never make that mistake again). I have totally revamped my clothing style. I subscribe to GQ, Details, and Esquire and pick styles from that with the help of my female friends. I also read Cosmo (know thyn enemy is what my female friends said), etc. I have relatively good self confidence, I have my own place, live debt free, make a decent living, etc. I know what my abilities are and what my weaknesses are and I have a plan to fix each of them (for example working out, having microdemabrrasion to remove acne scars, taking dance lessons, reading all the PUA material, going out all the time, talking to everybody, working on social networking, etc)

Outer Game

I don’t have a lot of trouble approaching women. I’m relatively self-confident and can walk up and talk to anybody. It’s after that when things often fall apart. Using the Magic Bullets system I guess the qualification and comfort building phase is where I have trouble at. I can get them to talk, take a seat, use false time constraints, etc but it’s very hard for me to number close. I often start to get nervous around the moment and I guess I just am not a pro at reading the signs yet because I’m never sure exactly what to do. As far as at clubs dancing has helped a lot, I get girls to dance with me who are friends and I’ve had some luck getting other girls I don’t know to dance but that’s all so far. I’d like to be able to take it from there. I also hang out a lot in coffee shops but I seem to have trouble just striking up conversations with random females there. At the mall and everywhere else I say hello to every girl I see and smile, etc but almost none of them stop to say anything back except maybe hello.

I have to admit that even 4 months later I am still somewhat depressed and upset over my last relationship exploding and I’m working on as many other areas of my life as I can for example school (I’m working full time and in school full time), getting back in shape, improving my style as far as dress goes, reading all this PUA material, etc. I don’t have a lot of time during the week to go out and practice any of this. I’m either in school (little time between classes to game at all) or at work (No females at all here to game) or at the gym (none here either), but the weekends are game. Any way, I’m not sure exactly what other information there is to offer so feel free to ask any questions, make any comments, suggestions, etc. I’m pretty lonely after living with my last GF for the entire time so I have some personal time where it’s pretty terrible, but in those moments I just try to go out as much as possible. I don’t believe the heavens will just open up and drop some angel into my arms, I know I’ll have to work for it but I just don’t exactly know what else to do. Thank you in advance for any responses to this post.

[playercool]

I can relate to you pretty well. Had a GF for 3 years which ended about 3 months ago.

I dealt with it almost exactly as you have. The only difference is I number close. When you start doing this you will start spending time with women on a more personal level. IE: Getting Laid.

In addition to this if you so choose you can hang out with them. Dinner, movies, etc. This will also ease the loneliness you currently feel.

If you are building up good rapport and attraction with your sets number closing is super easy. I typically try to just get one good number a night. Getting multiple numbers I have found usually turn into flakes. If I get one number a night it is usually solid. Here is what I say.

Hey you should give me your number and we will hang out sometime. I then hand them my phone to type it in.

Another thing a lot of people do is say hey how can we continue this conversation at a later date? Hopefully they are wise enough to offer their number. If not just go on saying hrmm you would think they would have invented a device for that.

When I am at home and have nothing else to do I read. Read books, blogs, websites, etc. Pretty much all PU related stuff. Not only does this take my mind away it also improves my game. I have also started writing. Keeping track of my success and PU Life. This allows me to look back and reflect on what I am trying to achieve. Pretty much right now that is sleeping with a lot of girls. I guess this is in the search of the perfect one.

Goodluck