Helping HBs to DHV

[Scoundrel]

Something I’ve been having trouble with is helping girls DHV. I’ll say something like “so, what do you have going for you besides your looks” and she can’t think of anything. So, I’ll ask “what do you do that brings you joy? What is your passion?” and she still can’t come up with anything and she starts to feel like shit.

How can I help her?

[Finesse]

Think of something that EVERYONE has to have done in their life at least once.

Examples:
Had a loved one die.
Helped a friend (or anyone really) out of a tough situation somehow.
Been really excited after finding out about something... (such as CJ's surge of ambition after first child.)

Then play off those instead.

[Blue]

true story: a friend of mine who is a MM instructor was out one night running lines and asked a chick what she had going for herself besides her looks. her response? "uuh... i have a car!"

when you are asking these questions, they are complying. asking a girl what sets her apart or what she has going for her besides her looks is making her qualify herself to you... so if she comes up with an answer, even if its stupid, you have to give praise. PUAs should never punish compliance.


but ill just say it...

if a girl cant come up with something cool or exciting about herself that she is passionate about then she is probably just a douche bag.

[Twitchy]

I have had this happen to me too.

I was out at a popular Monday night spot. There was this gorgeous, gorgeous girl at the bar. She was so hot that guys were ordering her drinks and shots from afar. She had three drinks in front of her ordered by random guys when I walked up to her.

I plowed through her ignoring my initial opener... survived several hard core shit tests... slowly broke her away from a girl friend and a gay guy friend... isolated her to a corner of the bar so I could talk to her... got a small kiss from her... and then when I asked her what she had going for herself more than her looks, she couldn't come up with anything.

Trying to help her out, I gave her some categories...Favorite places you have traveled? Any special talents like singing? Exciting hobbies? Nothing, nothing and nothing.

So I excused myself and walked away. Looks aren't everything and Dallas is full of way too many douche bag guys and girls.

[Westfall]

and then when I asked her what she had going for herself more than her looks, she couldn't come up with anything.

Trying to help her out, I gave her some categories...Favorite places you have traveled? Any special talents like singing? Exciting hobbies? Nothing, nothing and nothing.

I've encourtered this and inturperted it to mean that she's never been asked this question --never had to qualify herself to a guy before (or often).

Westfall

[Scoundrel]

Truthfully, you can’t qualify someone in a few minutes. But, there are a number of HBs that really don’t have anything going for them other than looks it seems.

[Sheek]

I simply don't bother -- if you can't tell from talking to her normally that she's done some cool stuff or has a really fun personality, there's no point in forcing it from her. I just think forced "qualification" is simply a guy rationalizing fucking/"gaming" a girl for her looks into fucking/gaming her for her looks + something else.

I've encourtered this and inturperted it to mean that she's never been asked this question --never had to qualify herself to a guy before (or often).

Westfall

ORLY?

[Welsh_Dragon]

I hate (and have never used) lines like "What else have you got going for you other than your looks?". It's so cliche. You recongize her looks (almost always bad). And it's completely un-necessary.

Just connect with her on whatever it may be. I'm assuming you are not sarging an amoeba?! I have never met a human being who has no passion for anything. That in and itself is a passion for being a lazy bum.

I screen hard but only for attraction then compliance. Blue pretty much nailed it. I've been with a fair few "douce bag" girls though. The term is misleading as it generally applies to men that women don't want. Airhead might be more appropriate.

[Kraven]

Sup PUAs

Your target pretending to be uninteresting despite her obviously charming T&A is just a shit test, don't fall for it

If you have time (by that I mean that it is talky enough of an interaction at that point) show them how it works by describing what you like to do, try to elicit a smile and then IOD to draw them in

Or Styles EV

I don't use them myself much yet, but this is also where masters of the cold read like Style again step in with one and change it on the fly based on their targets reactions and facial expression

[Twitchy]

I think these are great suggestions. However, for me, I am out for more than just a lay. I can get that anytime. I am actually looking for a quality girl.

If I have to pull teeth just to carry on a decent conversation to get to know her a little better, then I don't need to waste my time - shit test or not. Her loss.