Dallas PUA

Why do I have trouble with all openers other then situational.

There has to be a reasonable explanation.

They are not congruent with your personality. Don't use someone else's, create your own.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with a situational opener as long as you can break that thread and start discussing other things. The problem with situational openers is that guys get stuck on them and follow that thread until it is dead.

The advantage to openers is that 1) you know what you are going to say so as you are nervously approaching, you don't have to think on your feet 2) if you use an opener enough, you will realize that you only get a set amount of responses and you can come up with good things to say for each response.

All that being said, the most common opener I use is a smile and "hi"

Situationals come more naturally because there not rehearsed. When you try and approch spot on with only prethought opens you have built it up in your mind. Because of that the attachment to the interaction is higher, hince you worry more about what might happen.

Twitchy wrote:They are not congruent with your personality. Don't use someone else's, create your own.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with a situational opener as long as you can break that thread and start discussing other things. The problem with situational openers is that guys get stuck on them and follow that thread until it is dead.

The advantage to openers is that 1) you know what you are going to say so as you are nervously approaching, you don't have to think on your feet 2) if you use an opener enough, you will realize that you only get a set amount of responses and you can come up with good things to say for each response.

All that being said, the most common opener I use is a smile and "hi"

Thaddeus wrote:Situationals come more naturally because there not rehearsed. When you try and approch spot on with only prethought opens you have built it up in your mind. Because of that the attachment to the interaction is higher, hince you worry more about what might happen.

And thats all I have to say about that.

**emphasis added.

Dude, don't worry about not being good with canned or unoriginal material. I think A LOT of guys on this board would kill to be in a position in which they could just open based on being spontaneous. I think spontaneous openers are vastly superior because they represent your true thoughts and personality and, as such, women don't get the idea that you aren't being geniune.

Still though its really helpful to have a handful of canned routines and stories to make sure the energy of the interaction doesn't die off. Have ready and loaded to go in case you need them.