Dallas PUA

At the library on Thursday, went into a 2 set that my wing had already opened, started talking to the HB8. Was in a good mood, ran some material, told a couple DHV stories. Noticed she seemed interested and was playing with her hair. My wing had to leave so I screwed up a bit by not staying. I tried to qualify and number close in a hurry in one shot, and it worked but I fumbled and over-negged. Asked for, and received, a nice kiss on the cheek before I left.

Three days later, sent out the "Happy Easter!" text to a bunch of numbers I got a response from her. That's where this text conversation starts. I thought she had Monday off so I pushed early to get her on a date - I was wrong. Was going to leave it a few days, but she texted me from work on Monday so I tried the questions game and seemed to get OK results. I really wanted a date tonight for various reasons but she said she was busy before I asked, and she's leaving town soon for a week. So, my questions are: (1) what did I do right/wrong so far? and, (2) what should I do from here out?

Thanks.

13:00 HB8 - You too!
13:38 Aura - So what are you up to today? Staying out of trouble I hope
13:43 HB8 - Yes, just got off from work. Picking up some goodies for my nephew.
14:02 Aura - Aww that's so sweet! And to think I had you pegged as a little hell kitten...
14:05 HB8 - Ha yeah, you told me I had a horrible personality
14:12 Aura - Naw I'm sure I didn't say that. I remember thinking you were the kind of girl my mom warned me about
14:17 HB8 - Ha no you said it lol
14:31 Aura - Must be why I was thinking about you yesterday... Unless it was something you slipped into my drink
14:33 HB8 - Ha is that why you found me on facebook
14:46 Aura - Must be. Ok, I'm off to the gym. Be good and I hope your nephew likes his treats! Later
14:56 HB8 - Do you work out at 24 too?
15:25 Aura - No. My company has a really nice fitness facility. They even have Scuba classes- I'm gonna sign up this summer
15:32 HB8 - Oh, that sounds fun
20:25 HB8 - How was the work out
20:41 Aura - Great. It was real quiet there being Easter. I like to go on Sunday afternoon to unwind from a busy weekend. I feel like an awful person for what I said to you at the library...
20:47 HB8 - I probably had a horrible look on my face because I was mad at XXXXX (my friend that was next to me.) But it did kinda suck. Ha
21:10 Aura - Let me make it up to you. Coffee, tomorrow night. I'll text you when I get off work.
21:11 HB8 - I would but I have to close tomorrow. I switched with someone since I'm leaving Wednesday.
21:15 Aura - So what time do you get off work?
21:18 HB8 - 1030
21:31 Aura - Yeah not going to happen tomorrow I have to work early Tuesday morning
21:32 Aura - You remember my friend XXXXXXX? He made jolly rancher vodka yesterday. He sent me a pic
21:32 HB8 - Ha. I do too
21:33 HB8 - That sound delicious
21:34 HB8 - Candy is my weakness :-/
21:36 Aura - [pic]
21:39 HB8 - How did he make that? I hope he did make his own vodka. That would be scary ha.
21:40 HB8 - I have made jolly rancher drinks with puckers and sprite. That is good.
21:45 Aura - Not sure. I'll have to ask him next time we hang out. I'm sure he didn't distill his his own vodka though
21:46 HB8 - I tired moonshine once. Ha not good
21:59 Aura - You and he should have a contest for best jolly rancher drink!
22:03 HB8 - y backseat. Not good.
22:03 HB8 - I haven't had one in awhile. Because the last time XXXXX and I made them she left the left over sprites in my car and the cans blew up with the Texas heat in m
22:08 Aura - Lol! Sounds fun. You're my text girlfriend for the next 5 minutes
22:09 HB8 - What?
22:17 Aura - As we broke up now. Sorry, it's not you, it's me. You can keep the dog
22:20 HB8 - It's for the best...
22:23 Aura - Now I miss you baby, take me back
22:24 HB8 - Sorry, no take backs. Everything happens for a reason.
22:30 Aura - You're just causing trouble for the hot make up sex. I'm onto you... *glare*
22:32 HB8 - We shall see
22:36 Aura - Sorry honey, not tonight. I'm too tired.
22:38 HB8 - So you are a role player, ay?
22:44 Aura - Sounds like you are, haha
22:45 HB8 - Never really have before
22:47 Aura - Yeah, me neither. But don't get any ideas, I'm not a piece of meat. I have feelings too.
22:50 HB8 - And I'm a lady
22:56 HB8 - So tell me something about you.
23:01 Aura - Traffic was backed up going to the gym today. There was an accident and someone was being loaded into an ambulance. It made me sad that someone's Easter was ruined by getting injured like that.
23:03 HB8 - Awe that's really sad.
23:03 Aura - ...and that I had to wait and take a detour
23:05 HB8 - Ah
23:08 Aura - I am a humanist who believes in values centered on human well-being. Ever since I was little I always wanted things to just work out for people, and I still am bothered when they don't.
23:10 Aura - Ok kiddo, that's all the philosophy you're getting out of me tonight. I'm going to bed. You know, work and all. Later!
23:11 HB8 - Okay, night
18:33 HB8 - How was your day
19:51 Aura - Terrible. A really cute girl broke up with me last night and I couldn't concentrate all day.
19:52 HB8 - Oh no, that sounds horrible
19:54 Aura - Yeah, over text too. So cold-hearted
19:54 Aura - How are you doing?
20:15 HB8 - Good, just working.
20:30 HB8 - The leagues are making the night go by faster
20:32 Aura - Leagues?
20:35 HB8 - Basketball
20:49 HB8 - Odd question. How old are you
20:54 Aura - Guess.
20:58 HB8 - 26 area ?
21:00 HB8 - 27, 28
21:01 Aura - I'll tell you if you answer a question for me. Fair?
21:03 HB8 - Fair
21:05 Aura - I'm 28. Now, what's the craziest thing you've ever done?
21:08 HB8 - I thought. That XXXXX said you looked younger. Give me a minute to think
21:20 Aura - Must not be very crazy if you have to think so long...
21:20 HB8 - Um well I have ran from the police before trying to get out of a ticket. I have also have done inappropriate things in a video store during hours. I'm very adv
21:20 HB8 - enturous.
21:21 HB8 - Sorry I was doing a XXXXXX through
21:25 Aura - Haha, nice. Let's keep this going. Here's your chance to ask me anything.
21:34 HB8 - What*
21:34 HB8 - That is yours
21:38 Aura - ... What? Try again, before I retract my offer
21:39 HB8 - I want to know your craziest
21:41 Aura - My craziest is not best-told over text, and it's pretty inappropriate. So how about I promise to tell you another time, and you ask me something else instead.
21:44 HB8 - Okay, don't forget! What kind of music do you listen to
21:49 Aura - Lots of stuff. Southern rock is my fav. Alternative, some pop, house music, blues... I mix it up.
21:52 Aura - Now it's my turn. How many boyfriends have you had? I always get the Car-Fax before I buy
21:55 HB8 - Serious relationships that lasted a year plus, 3
22:04 HB8 - Give me like 10 minute closing the building
22:33 HB8 - Sorry that took for ever
22:39 Aura - Where are you, home?
22:40 HB8 - Are you still awake
22:41 Aura - Yup.
22:43 HB8 - Yes, just got here
22:44 HB8 - Favorite color
22:47 Aura - Really?? You can ask me anything and you ask my favorite color? Alright... Red, the color of passion, life, and my alma mater.
22:49 HB8 - Haha
22:49 HB8 - Dog or cat
22:51 Aura - Excuse me, I believe it's my turn. Have you ever kissed a girl?
22:51 HB8 - Number of people you have been with
22:52 HB8 - Yes, but nothing passionate
22:55 HB8 - Pick one of the last two I asked and you didn't answer
22:55 Aura - I promised you an honest answer, so I've been with 6 girls. And definitely dog- I'll give you that for free.
22:56 Aura - Better make the next one interesting. I'm getting tired.
22:56 HB8 - It's you turn
22:57 Aura - What's the best place you've had sex?
22:58 HB8 - Doesn't matter the place only the intensity.
22:59 HB8 - Ever been married?
23:00 Aura - Lol!!! No. Looking for a reason for my low count...
23:01 HB8 - Do you think you're a good kidder?
23:01 HB8 - Kisser*
23:01 HB8 - And no
23:02 Aura - Yes I do. Gotten compliments many times.
23:03 HB8 - Boxers or briefs
23:05 Aura - You're hilarious. Boxers. Who wears briefs? And you never told me the best place you had sex. I agree btw, place isn't that important but it's a nice touch
23:06 HB8 - First thing you notice about someone.
23:07 Aura - Not until you answer...
23:08 HB8 - I don't know. Things could get loud.
23:10 Aura - First thing I notice is someone's eyes. Tells a lot about them.
23:12 HB8 - So mine told you I had a horrible personality
23:12 HB8 - ?
23:13 Aura - Yours told me you were hiding something. And I was right.
23:14 HB8 - I have nothing to hid
23:14 Aura - You were hiding a lot of your energy, passion, and tenacity, but I see it now. That's why I'm intrigued.
23:15 HB8 - And I was tired ha
23:16 Aura - One more Q and then I'm going to bed. So make it good.
23:17 HB8 - Ever been skinny dipping
23:17 Aura - Not yet.
23:18 HB8 - Ah
23:19 Aura - Here's my last one: what's your deepest sexual fantasy?
23:22 HB8 - Not sure, never really thought about it honestly. I have done what I have thought about, but I'm always open to new.
23:23 HB8 - But in saying all that...I don't sleep around. Hope you don't get the wrong idea.
23:26 Aura - Not at all. Three 1+ year relationships? But it's healthy to be in touch with your sexuality.
23:27 HB8 - Agreed.
23:29 Aura - Alright, sleepy time. Dream about me!
23:29 HB8 - Haha good night
23:33 Aura - You too
14:31 Aura - Do you have an evil twin? I just saw someone who looks like you.
14:33 HB8 - No sir, there is only one of me.
14:33 HB8 - I have sisters but they look nothing like me
14:35 Aura - Or maybe you're her evil twin. You at work?
14:39 HB8 - Yes
14:42 HB8 - Off already?
14:43 Aura - Nope. Just between meetings.
14:44 HB8 - Ah that sounds fun!
14:46 Aura - Sometimes my job feels like a dilbert cartoon. Today is one of those days.
14:59 Aura - You closing again tonight?
15:02 HB8 - Haha. It's never a boring moment here
15:07 HB8 - No. 8-430
15:14 Aura - Good for you. I'll be here until around around 6.
15:15 HB8 - I have lots to do before I leave
15:17 Aura - Sorry, but I can't hang out tonight. I have to go pick up a TV
15:18 Aura - Where are you going?
15:19 HB8 - Maryland.
15:19 Aura - Oh cool. Wedding, right? I was just there at the end of January
15:20 HB8 - Nj and va
15:25 HB8 - Wedding and such. It should be interesting
15:28 Aura - Drunken debauchery at the bachelorette party usually does that.
15:33 HB8 - I'm going to a baseball game too.
15:34 HB8 - Might get some interesting texts
15:37 Aura - Sounds like you would enjoy that
15:41 HB8 - You might
15:43 Aura - No idea what you're talking about. I charge for my entertainment per msg - I'll send you a bill.
15:51 HB8 - Haha I should be the one charging
15:54 Aura - ...but that's all you get for now. Have to run to a meeting. Have fun.
15:55 HB8 - I'm about to be off...so you have fun in your meeting

Fun read. Looks like you can draw a lot of info from some well placed texts. She's leaving on Wednesday but its going to be a Herculean feat to keep the energy up over text for a long time. If it were me I would push for a time to meet up when she gets back into town.

Man, that is an insanely long text thread. I have a pretty good feeling that you'll hear from her regularly while she's out of town. At this point, I don't think pushing for a meeting will be required. While she's out of town, I'd take the policy of slowing the texts down a bit with her. If you and her spend the next week texting like the way you have already, you run the risk of subcommunicating that you have nothing better to do with your life than text some chick you don't even know while she's out of town.

Remember, a lot of women use guys to text with as entertainment. This is especially true with the younger crowd AND painfully true with the women that don't have some type of professional job (i.e. service industry, retail, student, etc.).

I used to travel a lot more for my job than I do now but whenever I met a girl right before I had to go out of town for an extended period of time, I'd send her pictures and one liners a lot. I wouldn't necessarily engage in lenghty conversation, after all I had work to do and I spent my nights solo sarging in whatever city I was in at the time. If I was on vacation, I'd send her a picture of the beach and ocean and say something like: "Wish you were here...prancing around in a bikini..."

Or, I'd send a picture of a high rise lit up at night and say: "Look at that glorious building...I should bring you here someday so we can sex it up on the roof "

I'd send a picture of a piece of chewing gum stuck to the floor of the airport terminal and say: "Someone gets paid to scrape this up, I should change careers, it looks like a growth industry..."

I never really engaged in more than a handful of texts each day, but I would use visual cues and one liners or comments about the pictures to keep the interaction going but to make it fun and to get her imagination working. In other words, I'd make her feel as if she were with me. You can do the exact same thing when she's out of town. I found sending pictures was a much, much more effective way of keeping her dangling on the hook than just sending mindless dribble via text.

Finally, I found that the picture routine allowed me to get her involved in sending pictures as well. I'd send one, then challenge her to send one. More often than not, she'll end up sending one of those nude or semi-nude pictures she took of herself in the mirror. In other words, you raise your investment, then nudge her to do the same. If a girl is sending you pictures, especially if they're of herself, then she's in. All of this will raise her buying temperature, make her feel special, build more comfort (which is hard to do via text), and prep her for whenever it is that you get back in town.

Just try not to fall into the trap of sending one text right after another. You don't even have to contact her every day. You can if you wish, but make sure that you're more efficient, clever, and unique with your texts now. The picture routine will most defintely do that for you.

Everything Bull Run said and then some. If you hadn't said you met this chick last week, I woulda thought that was like 2 months worth of text messages. I'd definitely cut that down some, but I do see where you went for the meet-up on multiple occasions. Usually if she declines (and doesn't counter-offer) I drop the current thread. At least it gives the impression that if she's not down, then you'll find someone who is. Or better yet, you actually find someone who is. Which if you think about it, makes a lot of sense. There's no way in hell you'd be able to sustain conversation threads like that with multiple girls. Especially replying to her within a minute or two. Besides, I'd save that juicy conversation material for when you're in person.

The other thing I noticed, you said you met her Thursday and texted her Sunday. If you currently have a "# day rule" for sending the first text or calling, throw that out the window. It's 2012, Swingers was a day of the past. In this fast paced world, if you're interested in her, you should go after it right away. Given that she's an HB8 (per your rating) and most likely went out Friday or Saturday, that's probably another 20 guys she talked to. Granted she's been hitting you up regularly and whatnot, but you could have expedited the process by a couple of days which were essentially burned by doing nothing. Especially if it comes to the point where you find out she's not interested in meeting up, you just saved yourself 48 hours.

The night of Triumvirate's talk, I got a couple numbers at McFadden's. One of them went to my university and even competed for the same athletic team, but was a few years younger. The other one was a friend of a girl Triumvirate got to meet him there. Couldn't get a pull from either, so I got their numbers. Never heard from either again. The first girl had a handful of guys talking to her outside the bar after it closed, and I found out the second girl banged a different guy the next night. Needless to say, waiting 2, 3, 4 or 5 days to text either of them would have been a waste of 2, 3, 4 or 5 days. I'd say this scenario accounts for ohhh 85-90% of the girls I meet at the bars. And that's from being at this shit for 3+ years. If your time is important to you, you'll use as little of it as possible.

As for the wing situation, when it comes to a pull every guy has to hold his own. The main purpose of the wing is to make the obstacle not an obstacle anymore. If he had to leave and the friend wasn't trying to ruin your shit, then he did his job. In a lot of cases if you open a two-set by yourself and the friend isn't interested but at the same time doesn't think you're a threat to the target, she'll just walk away. No need to approach in tandem, or have your wing "take one for the team."

With that said, decide what your goal is when going out. If you're looking for a pull, prepare as such. Reserve no room for half-measures. This was covered during Triumvirate's talk. From what it sounds like you had to leave the venue because your wing did. I'll assume you rode there with him or otherwise. If you thought you had a chance to go home with that girl, paying for a cab or riding with her is not out of the question. Or your car is always "around the corner." If the pull is your goal then the number is simply a consolation prize, or a means to further your ability to get the pull. Only when it is no longer an option should you go for the number, and then use it to try to meet up as soon as possible. You'd be surprised how quickly girls lose interest. And if you become her text buddy, it's all downhill from there...

Wow, thanks for the detailed responses. I appreciate the advice!

I guess I didn't text her before Sunday because I was busy (random stuff during the day, and going out both nights) and also because I didn't want to seem too needy. Sounds like the consensus is to text sooner- I'll keep that in mind next time.

Leaving early was a total mistake. My wing and I both had to work the next morning so we both agreed to leave around midnight, and when he left I realized it was getting late - but no reason to leave a good set. I think I'm not used to building attraction with a girl that cute and I wanted to quit before I screwed it up. AFC thing to do... what can I say, I'm still learning.

As an update to the situation, she's continued to text me - last night, and before and after her flight today. Last night actually worked out great, because I had another girl coming over. After a few back and forth I said, "I'm expecting company any minute so I won't be able to chit chat for long." If she's smart she can read between the lines - it was 9:45pm, and I stopped texting - what kind of company is that?

I will slow down the responses, and I really like the pictures idea. I'll have to think of some clever ideas. Any suggestions on how to prompt her for a risque picture without sounding creepy?

IsiMan84 wrote:As for the wing situation, when it comes to a pull every guy has to hold his own. The main purpose of the wing is to make the obstacle not an obstacle anymore. If he had to leave and the friend wasn't trying to ruin your shit, then he did his job. In a lot of cases if you open a two-set by yourself and the friend isn't interested but at the same time doesn't think you're a threat to the target, she'll just walk away. No need to approach in tandem, or have your wing "take one for the team."

I'm going to add a bit of a caveat here that has helped me with my wings over the years. First things first, I hate, hate, hate winging someone and having someone wing me. Most sets of women that are actually interested in being approached are 3 sets or below, if you can't run a 3 set on your own then you've got a lot of work to do. There are exceptions such as a bachelorette or themed birthday party, which you can easily insert yourself in regardless of size. I strictly approach alone but that's come with a ton of sets and a lot of experience so it's not for the faint of heart. I also sarge alone or when I'm with a group of friends that don't know of or aren't involved in the community.

For you newer guys, having a wing can ease the stress of running a larger set. My recommendation with wings is not wing with a guy that is your friend, like a real friend. A community friend sure, but not a real friend. Obviously, over time, community friends become real friends so keep that in mind. The reason you don't want a real friend in there is because they take your success personally, especially if they fail. A lot of times, they'll just blow up the interaction if it's not going their way. They do this because they know you'll still be friends after he fucks everything up for you.

The second recommendation I have is to try to pick a wing that has slightly worse game than you and is roughly as physically attractive as you, it's better if you're slightly better looking. Having a wing that is just a couple of steps behind you in skill will make you look that much better, you'll be the alpha and he, by default, the beta. I hate to say it, but every good wing I ever had didn't have very good game at all. They were cool dudes and they used me to open sets because they couldn't, in return I was able to pick my target and he was able to try to get any leftover avaliable. It was a very symbiotic relationship and benefited both of us...me more so than them, but they certainly got laid more with hotter chicks than they otherwise would have been able to pull.

@ Aura:

I typically send a text message either the next day or late the same night that I meet a girl. I use a completely generic, canned response which has worked very well for me over the years. Remember that if you met a girl in a bar/club then she very likely was hit on a lot and had a few drinks, there's nothing wrong with sending here a short text just so you're in the forefront of her mind.

Obviously leaving the set didn't hurt you in the least. She is after all blowing up your phone. There's absolutely nothing wrong with ejecting from a set. In fact, I think it's one of the best techniques one can use. Very rarely will a girl leave a bar/club when she met a guy she likes, she'll wait around for you to come back and say hi. Also, there's nothing AFC about ejecting if you're running out of shit to say. It's best you leave on a high note than force the interaction to continue, forcing it can hurt you way more than just ejecting.

I think your text about having company was spot on man. Perfect response to shut her down for a while and to get her hampster wheel spinning. She absolutely knows what you mean. For example, whenever I go out with a girl and tell another girl I tell them that I met up with a friend. If I go out with my guy friends I tell them the names of who I went out with. Those little subtlities are definitely picked up on by women.

Don't specifically ask for a sexy picture. Just send her a couple of pictures of random shit or of yourself dressed up in some really crazy get up. You just need to prompt her to send a picture.

Aura: Sent picture with witty tag line.
HB8: Haha...blah, blah, blah
Aura: You're turn...send me something hot, clever, and covered in awesome sauce!!

She just needs an excuse to send you something racey, all you're doing is giving her an excuse to do so. When it comes to sex and sexuality, that's really all you need to do with women: give them an excuse and they'll do pretty much anything you want....and, I do mean anything.

jeez that is wayyyy too long of a text. why not call her over to fuck.

if not fuck that bitch find another who will.

abundance fool.

if your interaction was solid you wouldnt have to do this gay text game.
thats why you get flakes.