A few days ago I get a random friend request from a cute girl who has several mutual friends with me. I had an idea and went with it. The conversation is exactly as follows...
Me: I don't think we've met...are you my new facebook stalker?
Her: Lol um no I don't think so and no lol I'm not a stalker
Me: Well I don't know...I can't put you on the safe list yet, so you're under "possible stalker" ;D
Looks like we know a lot of the same people. How do you know my cousins? XXX and XXX?
The second part of my reply is just fluff to build comfort... I do this on several of the following posts
Her: Lol well allow me to introduce myself. My name is XXXX. Lol there, problem solved. Now I'm not stalkerish lmfao
Me: Well hello XXXX, now that we're friends I'm gonna have to go ahead and charge you a $20 service fee for moving you up from "possible stalker"
Or you can just tell me a little bit about yourself and it's free.
Her: Lol charge it
ha ha jk, lol i am currently attending Nsu, I drive a red mustang I went to watts for 8 yrs then moved to westville for the last two and graduated lol um I hate Mexican food,iv never been hunting, I am probably one of the biggest osu, and red soxs fan ul ever meet. I love to dance and I'm rly clumsy lol BINGO! Attraction achieved, now I gatta keep it going...
Me: Do you tell every guy you meet on the internet this stuff? Can I get your social security number?
I graduated from watts in 2006. Guess we never met.
Her: Lol no I dont, but I got to say ur the first one that's put me under a "possible stalker" list
Me: Well you never can be too careful in this day and age. You could be some 300lb 45 year old dude living in his mom's basement for all I know.
I did take you off the limited profile, so now you can facebook creep on me. ;D
Her: Lol woah woah u got it all wrong, I'm 200 lbs not 300 lol jk jk
Lol I promise I'm not some old guy who lives n his moms basement lol I'm very much a 22 yr old girl lol
Me: Ok XXXX, 22 yr old girl...if that really is your name and age...When does Christmas break start for you?
Her: I'm already on break
I felt like she was getting bored with the conversation at this point so I knew I had to act quick before my chances of meeting her in person evaporated.
Me: Yeah? I'm almost done myself. Hey you wanna grab some coffee and continue this conversation when I'm back in town?
I wanna make sure we're in a public place so you can't kidnap me or anything
Her: Lol ha ha okay sounds good. Lol id hate for ppl to see u having coffee w a 200lb pound man who stil lives n his moms basement jk jk lol I would love to
What I learned from this:
Since voice tone and body language can't be communicated over text, you've got to be careful with how your words might come off. I made sure to add lots of
, and ;D, and to show I'm just busting on her. If you look at the first few messages, I added some small talk in there that she never actually acknowledged. She only replied to the flirty stuff...which is what I wanted.
Any suggestions, critiques, or comments?