FR: Team Success

[Phenix]

Background:
At a venue, we we're dancing having a good time. Gift brings one of the girls in to dance, start talking, they head out for a cig break.

40 mins later, i see her walk in. Gift not around. I think...okay, this means he hit a roadblock. I think, "Fuck this shit, you did not just do that to my bro. Let's see how far I can take the assist."

I bump into her, "Yo. what did you do with my norwegian boy?"
HBRussia, "*laughs*. oh he's outside still smoking."
i talk about small world, people are people everywhere no matter where you go. She nods. I ask her about her first impression of him.

HBRussia: "I thought he was really hot and maybe gay b/c he looked good."
S: "Pfft, nah. he's just european. He's got the male model look and i took him to the photo studio."
HBRussia asks how we met, i tell her. she asks my first impression of him, i cheat, I tell her good things & qualities about him (which are true), but not my first impression . We're laughing. At this point, theGift walks into the door, sees me talking to her and starts to walk our way.

Luckily, the girl's back is to him, so i put my arm around her to pull her in close so she doesn't see him and with my hand behind her, i motion for him to go away. We hang out enough to know: pussy is just pussy & bro's before hoes. There was no verbal communication about who's target it was but Gift opened her, he went for her, and he knows i'd never try to "steal" his target without specifically & verbally getting permission.

I do my usual thing, she's laughing. And everyonce in a while, i would give credit to Gift for teaching me this cool thing that I would then show it to her. And a couple of times Gift would try to reenter and i would motion for him to go away and he did.

We somehow get into the topic of sex.
HBRussia: "Yea, i decided to take a vow of celibacy. You know, no more sex unless i'm in a relationship. No more meaningless sex"
Sticky: "Wow. How old are you?"
HBRussia: "19."
S: *put hand on her shoulder* "That's pretty amazing and mature of you. It took me a couple of years to realize that....Yea, i had done away with that. But you know, there was this one time in Spain. I met this Swedish girl, we had a great time, we laughed together and had a good time. And then I realized that my rule of no sex unless I'm in a relationship is just bad b/c it's preventing me from having an even greater time with her. Just b/c the logistics weren't in our favor, (I was only there for 3 wks, she was only there for 2 wks), doesn't mean i should let that get in the way. So i let it go, so we had a great time, had a lot of laughs, made some good memories...and not gonna lie, amazing sex." [true, minus the no sex rule and the sex wasn't that amazing]
HBRussia: *breaks out into laughter* "yea, i've had amazing sex before too."
S: "Hey, let's play this little game that Gift taught me." *start to do 3 questions*
At this point, the guy she arrived with comes up and i bring him "yea you can play this too." I'm finishing it up and Gift comes up, perfect timing. Starts occupying the guy.
"Hey, Gift, why don't you tell her what those answers mean since you taught me."
We switch, i'm now occupying the obstacle. He's friendly and finally say "Hey bro, let's get a drink." Now Gift's alone with her, back in the game, and the ball's back in his court.

Total time in set was like 15-20 minutes.

Things worked out great for them but, at the end of the night i was kinda pissed and not as happy as last time. I was frustrated that I find so few girls that *I'm* attracted to, and the ones that I'm attracted to are in sets that i haven't mastered (groups, walking, groups during day, etc). And, sure it was an impressive assist, but she wasn't cold like the one i won over so i didnt get to *truly* work on one of my goals. So I sat down and thought about the whole situation:
I'm great at winging. i have no problem going in and trying to hook my friend up. Even realized i'm way better at winning people over than i thought (story #1) and the only thing different in my mind was I was doing it for my friend.
Means i need to get comfortable with putting myself out there. And need to work on opening again. Worked the seated 5 set (story #1) fine b/c i was introduced to them.
I like winging for friends almost more than going for my success. I also find very few girls I'm attracted to. Why?
At first I thought, i was just using this as an excuse to not go for girls for me. Switch remarked you can only control 7 behaviors and your subconscious controls the rest. Then i thought about it more and then it hit me. Somehow, i've subconsciously slipped into "i want a girlfriend." and none of the girls I see at the bars come off as special or anything. Maybe i got jaded again and decided the way to entertain myself was to choose very difficult sets. Maybe that's why the only ones i think attractive are always in the hard sets. Ding! Epipheny. I tend to forget that one my personality flaws is "I want what I can't have."

Lessons learned:
Realized that i was really looking for someone special. made sense why i really had to drink to go for a lot of the girls I see (beer goggles outweigh desire to find someone special ). Now I've realized it, accepted it, and now i can go back to messing around. Now i can go continue gaming and realize that "hey, it's cool. i know she's not special or what i'm ultimately seeking but for now, this is fun." Ironic, i know.
Work on putting myself out there more, work on opening again.
At same time, remove myself from the situation. Do what I do when I'm winging for me. Try winging for myself. Also don't use "Team Success" as a crutch.
Also tone it down a little when selling your friend b/c when Gift was at HBRussia's place, she teased "So is sticky your wingman or something?" What? Ofcourse not! I'm an angel.