FR - YOUR Perception IS THEIR Reality

[Bull Run]

There just isn’t enough dialogue about Inner Game. In my opinion, it’s the only true game. Everything else is just bolt-ons, add-ins, tools, accessories, compliments. Truth be told, Game = Inner Game always. If you’ve got the right frame, if you’ve got surety of mind on your side, if you’ve got the presumption that you can do whatever it is that you want to do, if you’ve got the mentality that YOU define OTHER people’s vision / perception of you, then you are truly running game. Everything else is just a fake.

I’ve been told by a handful of some of Dallas’ best PUAs that I have a strong frame. Several of these PUAs have even stronger frames than I, therefore their compliment of my frame is truly an honor. I’m not going to name names, you guys know who you are. Plus anyways, you don’t need your name mentioned here…your frame is strong enough already.

Anyway, I’m here to tell you that yes I have a strong frame. I believe that now, I truly do. BUT, there is one group of people that constantly has destroyed my strong frame: Authority Figures.

My frame used to be incredibly weak. No non-existent is a better description. Too often I internalized other people’s words, actions, and thoughts of me. By too often, I mean all the time. I had no identity other than that that others projected upon me. I was a piece of clay that others molded to suit their own needs, desires, and wants. Fortunately, I discovered the Game, fashion, the gym, and a healthy lifestyle. The mixture of the aforementioned concoction of self-improvement fueled my increased confidence with women and made me more comfortable around men. But, I still lacked the proper frame to deal with others that I felt had some level of true authority over me. This weekend, my historical frame of weakness was tested by a true authority figure during a time in which I KNEW I fucked up.

Saturday night myself and a handful PUAs decided to take a break from our gaggle of women and hit the bush. No, not that bush. We decided to go camping. Just for one night of course. The festivities kicked off at 4/5pm, and so did the drinking. By the time 10pm rolls around we realize that we’re dangerously low on cigarettes, primarily because I’m a cigarette mooch. I’m not sure because I lost count, but I imagine that I’ve probably already downed at least 3 whiskies, 1 shot of Patron, 1 Cement Mixer, and I’m about half way through another whiskey. That’s a fair amount of booze.

So, in my current state of slight inebriation I thought it would be a good idea to drive one of my fellow PUAs to the convenience store 15 minutes from our campsite to pick up a pack of smokes. This was a selfish decision on my part because my desire for smokes while I drink becomes incredibly strong. Anyway, off to the car.

Imagine that it’s 10pm, in the middle of nowhere, no other cars on the road, and you’re driving a dangerously fast sports car. Oh yeah, did I mention your having a great time (endorphins) and are buzzing (alcohol)? Imagine what you would be doing. Think about it for a second…

I do believe it’s referred to as a 70 in a 20. Yep, that was me. Doing 70 in a 20.

Now, I’m a smart guy I really am. However, I make very bad decisions. I tend to be careless because I’ve always managed to get myself out of tough predicaments. Some call it luck. I just thought it was because I was better than everyone else. I’m just not like you. Right? Wrong. Saturday my luck ran out. It took all of the Inner Game I could muster to get myself out of this predicament…luck was no longer on my side. It was just me and my wing, PicturePerfect. And the two of us had to game what I previously believed was un-gameable. The cops…

As we were leaving the park grounds we see the flashing lights. My initial thought is that I’m toast. I begin wondering what the inside of a jail cell looks like. Not only have I been drinking, I’m not quite drunk but I highly doubt I could pass a sobriety test, but we both have open containers in the car. PicturePerfect with his beer, me with my whiskey. Of course our initial reaction is to hide the booze. No small feat when you drive a 350z.

I’m usually great with dialogue. Typically I can recite, with great accuracy, entire conversations while I’m in game mode. Tonight though was a little different. I was terrified. Totally terrified. As such, the details of what was said and by whom are somewhat hazy.

Obviously, the Park Ranger asks me for license and insurance and asks that we step out of the car. We both comply. He runs my plates and identity as PicturePerfect and I stand on the side of the road. After he’s done with my information, he comes over to PicturePerfect and asks for his I.D. Of course, we both get frisked, which was kind of nice. After the Park Ranger is done running PicturePerfect’s license, the ranger asks if we have any open containers in the car. PicturePerfect and I tell him the truth and tell him that the booze is on the passenger side of the car. Around this time two city cops show up to the scene to see if the ranger needs back-up. To the ranger’s credit, I genuinely believe that he was just trying to keep the incident contained and would probably have preferred that the cops just leave. Regardless these cops are green and as such are probably very, very eager to bust some young punks because we made a poor decision.

Again, I thought we were toast.

I truly believe that my past self would not have been able to get out of this situation. But, I had a wingman that kept encouraging me to keep my frame.

PicturePerfect: “Your perception is their reality. If you think you’re going to jail, you will. Keep your frame.”

The above was all I had. I had no other cards to play, no other options. I had to trust in my frame, in my internal strength, in my Inner Game to stay in control of the situation. It was about this time that my psychological state would be challenged in the physical world. The ranger calls me over to his truck. I of course comply. Out comes the pen light. The technical term for the test is horizontal gaze nystagmus (HGN). For those of you familiar with the test it’s the one in which the officer asks that you follow the movement of his finger to test for jerkiness and concentration. According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) this test is over 77% effective at identifying individuals with a BAC of 0.1 or greater. The last thought I had before the test began was very vivid and profound:

I wondered how many people fail this test because they’re flat out terrified. I bet if one were to be tested in a non-threatening scenario then more people would successfully pass this test.

Think about this for a second. There are two outcomes here: 1) jail or 2) not going to jail. The former is much, much more important than the latter to most. Psychology has shown time and time again that people are more impacted, defined by magnitude of feelings, by negative stimuli than to positive stimuli. I think back to the world of finance when I think about this concept. For anyone that has made a bad investment the ill will you felt from said investment was probably much, much greater than the good will you felt from a successful investment, even if the magnitude of the loss was the same on an absolute and relative basis. In other words, I think this is a test that is stacked against those without a strong frame. All things equal, i.e. equal levels of sobriety, if you’re the type of person that is greatly impacted by the negative then I believe your chances of passing this test will be much lower than that of someone with a strong frame. My experience gaming women has proven the same concept to me. The guy with the strongest frame wins, always. Period. It wasn’t until the moment right before the HGN test that I realized this dynamic applied to EVERYONE at ALL TIMES.

My perception: I’m going to prove to you that I’m sober. I’m going to stay out of jail.

Did strength of frame actually do anything to manipulate the world? No. But, it relaxed me. It calmed me down. The anxiety disappeared and I was able to focus on the task at hand without the effects of being overly emotional or thinking too much. The best analogy I can think of is when an athlete gets in the zone. Everything slows down, you see it all, you’re on autopilot. You don’t think, you ignore your higher functioning thought processes and you react to the world based on all of the experience you have. You KNOW what’s going to happen, you KNOW the appropriate responses now you just have to let yourself do it. Stop thinking, trust in your vision of yourself, and let your frame guide you through your interaction.

The Ranger’s Reality: This guy just passed the test. He’s sober.
I “got off” on an open container in a vehicle citation. A pain in the ass. But, I could have had a much different pain in the ass, figuratively and literally, had I ended up in jail.

Keep in mind that no one is in your head. No one knows what you’re thinking unless you start tipping them off with tonality, body language, and eye contact. Once you understand that only you know what you’re thinking you can begin to develop a strong frame that exudes confidence at all times. No one is infallible, but you sure can project that image to everyone all the time. You are what you think you are, others see the image of the person you choose to project. The Game truly is mental. It’s all in your head guys. Getting laid, running Game all starts and ends with your frame.

A BIG thanks to PicturePerfect for talking me through the situation.

[Twitchy]

http://twitchypua.blogspot.com/2007/07/avoid-dui.html

[PicturePerfect]

Youuuuuuuuuuuuu KNOW!
----

Thanks bro.
I wouldnt have been able to get pulled over in your car if it wasn't for you.

I just want to thank my family, friends, fuckin snoop dogg, xzbit for the California vacation (Its a song. For all you guys uhmm not from the west coast lol)

I also want to thank QT, for the trash can lid they let me borrow with out knowing and being a fuckin shit about selling me cigarettes that fuckin morning and having an out of state license. Then asking for fuckin passport.

I'd also like to slap the fat ass behind the fuckin counter for being a FAT ASS and asking for something so stupid. I want to thank my quick response to him "I'm not leaving the fucking country I'm buying a fuckin pack of smokes tubby. What the fuck if I'm tourist.. What tourist cant fuckin smoke."

I want to thank Whisky laced with honey, Sparks, Budlight and all the fuckin paper towels with brown skids I left in the bushes and uhmmm. Smirks for buying the cigarettes.


This post was brought to you by the word FUCK and the adjective FAT ASS

- PicturePerfect
Shake it like a polaroid picture - Outkast (Hey Ya!)

[DateDemon]

You think game doesn't apply to cops??? The same social skills you learn will apply to everything social. I have gamed the cops on two separate occasions. One while driving after being up over 48 hours partying in Vegas and another while I was walking down the street in a full suit carrying an ice chest full of booze at 4 in the morning (not obvious huh?).

I don't know if frame is what pulled me through it really but I used a lot of loaded language especially the Vegas trip one. It was a lot like running stripper game actually. My first goal was to get him out of cop mode. I started talking about how I just got back from Vegas and was exhausted and asked if he had ever been there and if he was as mentally exhausted when he left. I started talking to him about his history before being a cop and man I really got this guy to open up. Strippers are the same way once you get them out of stripper mode you wouldn't believe the emotional shit that will come out of them lol its like opening a flood gate.

Anyway I ended up getting off on both offenses (miracle anyone?) and to be honest social skills helped a lot. Also everyone that hasn't experienced the field sobriety test should know they shine the light in front of your face and tell you to follow it with your eyes. I didn't know anything about it before it happened to me. What they do is move the light really far to one side and your eyes wont be able to follow it that far. If you are drunk usually your eyes will start to twitch since you cant follow it. The real trick is just stay relaxed and dont strain your eyes too much following it. (I was drunk and whenever he moved it too far i would just shift my head a little. he got on to me a few times but I didn't twitch =) so I think I passed. )

Hope this helps in some weird way lol - DateDemon

Cop - "Captain morgan's so you are a whiskey drinker!!!???"
Drunk Me- "No actually captain morgan's is spiced rum"
Cop- "Well at least you know your alcohol."