A whole night of 'What the Fuck'

[Guest]

I'm not even sure where to start. Perhaps, the chaos started at Taco Cabana at the register, moments before I took a seat next to Chi, moments after I ordered the chicken tacos with no regard to the fine print on the menu which detailed the contents of the tacos(which included refried beans, sour cream, and cheese). That could have been it. It could also have started earlier that day when Wildman and I ran out of TP... I'm not sure where the bad mojo started, but I can definitely pinpoint the exact moment it reared its head like a fat man in a gray polo shirt with an allergy to purple flowers.

Ram and I were just getting started with the ram and Solace show, rolling through the opening credits and what-not, when I noticed the brunette with the auburn hair. The one whom we all soon realized was the proud owner of an 'I'm-a-filthy-Australian-whore' accent. (<----I love those things.) I caught an IOI, so i moved closer to test it. repositioned myself with Ram to look over my shoulder to gauge the interest. It was there. Moments later they walked by, within radius, and we acknowledged them, taking their responses passively.

Roughly 30 minutes later, amidst a show and tell concerning the graphic resolution of Pink Socks on Wildman's new HTC hero, the same set walked through. Dont let me confuse you. The entire set consisted of a swarm(2-3) frumpy dwarves surrounding their figurative snow white, high on the runoff attention she carelessly shrugged off. Somehow our group had engaged one of the chubby bridge trolls, naturally causing the other members of the set to fall in line. I pulled Snow White to me and let some of that Solace magic slide from my lips and into her ears. Split-seconds later she steps toward Wildman and gives him a nice kiss on the lips.

As we all know, Wildman refuses to acknowledge the existence of white girls, so he cringes and we all move on.

Another 10 minutes later, still within the bowels of Hurl-ock's, closer to the patio, the set re-emerges. Snow White approaches me directly with forward body language and stocked with enough compliments to disarm an army of Solace, also revealing her accent. I deal with about a minute of her talking and molesting me before dropping the super-secret, patented 'Wanna make-out?' line. Naturally, like frilly toothpicks in club sandwiches, she's for it. A few seconds later she's telling me how soft my lips are.

"really, yours were kinda firm... like a mild donkey punch to my face" I said smirking. She laughed.

More banter...

*** I should have snapped into direct mode and gone for the pull at this moment***

alas, I did not and assumed it was a sure shot. I had two unwanted difficulties, 1 involving a fellow'pua' isolating my target right in front of me. That took me by surprise .
Anyways, this guy apparently told her that "she could trust me and i was a good guy". Not quite the effect i'm going for, but It's a commendable attempt to "talk your boy up".

I prefer the bad boy approach myself. "you should definitely wrap it up and get ready to call-in to work tomorrow, as you won't be able to walk properly through the remainder of the weekend. Oh yea, "Hydrate"; word of the day ;)"

So, whilst this guy has isolated the Australian Snow White, her frumpy irish friend who looks as though she directly descended from toads, is left in my company, as I continue, with what I believe is disarming the obstacle.( In retrospect, this is completely unnecessary. I already k-closed. In further retrospect, I should have dipped out immediately after k-closing. Chalked it off to being good-looking, and dreamy, or something. Damn you, Ego, you have let me down again!!!!

So stupidly I hang out being pulled by my original target, while being pulled a completely opposite direction by her toadish friend. I lean into my targets ear "your GF is all over me".

"I know, shes drunk."

Eventually the australian coquette is elsewhere on the dance-floor, and I'm left to an incessant triangle-gazing frog like dwarf. I put on an unpleased face and say to her"Im about to have an anxiety attack" as I turn and flee the dance floor shaking off her hands as she attempts to follow me. FML! I hate when the ugs pounce on and misconstrue any bit of attention.

I need to step up my disinterest game(and my game in general) to many controllable variables knocked me down last night. Lucky it happened that way though. after fleeing the frog-princess i walked to the front door where i bumped into my current LTR's gf. close call

[Guest]

I also commend Wildman, and Ram for holding down the grenades whilst I charged into battle. Thangs for the wingmanship and risking your eye-sight. Love you guys.

[Guest]

First off, I would like to publicly apologize to solace for gaming solace's target...

For those of you who know me, I pride myself on being a good guy and would never intentionally game a fellow puas target.

In hindsight, I shouldve ejected without ever letting it escalate...

My bad solace.

[Guest]

[QUOTE=Prodigy;34508]First off, I would like to publicly apologize to solace for gaming solace's target...

For those of you who know me, I pride myself on being a good guy and would never intentionally game a fellow puas target.

In hindsight, I shouldve ejected without ever letting it escalate...

My bad solace.[/QUOTE]

I def believe that it wasn't intentional. Shit happens when there that many puas in one place.

But if I ever entertain women that short, fat, ugly, and lame again... someone better pull damnit! Seriouse those chicks gave me the worst noner (negative boner and I did just coin that phrase) of all time. But on a positve note they inspired me to work out more. lol

[Guest]

Prodigy, thanks man, that means a lot. I know you always mean well, and you have always been a good wing. Sorry we didn't see you out tonight.

Ram has officially coined and set in motion, the "Noner". Glad you found inspiration in the set-backs.

[Guest]

Fact: I remember two things from Friday night...

1) guy in gray shirt wanting to fight PicturePerfect and me just standing in the way.

2) Taking a jaeger bomb somewhere in Uptown.

This is what I get for not eating at all Friday. At least with no food on the gut, next day booze shits are minimal. :D

[Guest]

@Smirks
1) It was nice to see you in action. During the car ride you talked about how much you've changed and how you deal with other alpha males. He quickly backed down and tried to befriend you
2) with your new haircut? [url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4JMOh-cul6M#t=2m19s[/url]

@Solace
"incessant triangle-gazing frog like dwar[ves]" need lovin' too. Apparently they just have to find you :-)
But, if nothing else, you learned something from this interaction, and hopefully you won't be such a dwarf magnet next time. Also, you're more aware of when to pull your target next time.

[Guest]

@Ram: roflmao "noner". dude, can I use it, if I acknowledge your copyright?

@Solace: Good story man! When I met the chick I'm with right now, her duff (dumb ugly fat friend) was trying some fucked up tactics everytime she would leave to go the bathroom. Even started sucking my fingers are one point.

I've found that "Hey, your cool, but I'm really interested in your friend" has the exact opposite effect of it's purpose.

Gotta love those WTF nights.

[Guest]

[QUOTE=Smirks;34524]Fact: I remember two things from Friday night...

1) guy in gray shirt wanting to fight PicturePerfect and me just standing in the way.

2) Taking a jaeger bomb somewhere in Uptown.

This is what I get for not eating at all Friday. At least with no food on the gut, next day booze shits are minimal. :D[/QUOTE]

Gahdammit, I miss Dallas.