Saturday Night Day 3

[Guest]

A little background. Met this girl a little while ago, and posted about it here:

[url]http://www.dallaslair.com/forum/showthread.php?t=5743[/url]

Since then, I was able to text her, and invite her out to a New Years party where we hung out the whole night, danced and made out before she had to leave home with her friends.

I set up a day three, but it should probably be noted that though we did talk on the phone at least once (there might have been a second time, but I can't remember) She would usually miss my call and not get back to me for a very long time. I tried punishing her by missing her calls back. Sometimes, she'd text me back to say sorry for missing my call, but out of fear of losing value I decided to set up the day 3 via text, and she agreed to it.

A week passed, and she would show some interest by texting me during the week about whatever without being prompted.

Anyway. Friday come, and it's time for the day 3. I go to her apartment and we walk to a nearby restaurant, where neither of us finished our food, and we stayed and talked for quite a while even after the check had been paid.

The conversation was slow at first, but obviously picked up considerably. I noticed on the way there, and at the restaurant, she had a lot of trouble looking me in the eye. The conversation was mostly me trying to run comfort, and stayed that way throughout the night. The only physical contact was me touching her thigh or arm to emphasize a point in conversation.

After dinner we went to get ice cream, and again stayed and talk long after that was done. The conversation got pretty good by this point.

She invited me back to her place, and her roommate was home. We went immediately into her bedroom, lay down on the bed and started making out. I pulled back to create some tension, and then a few minutes later the roommate came in with a friend and they talked for a little bit. Then the roommate and friend left the apartment.

We had the place to ourselves, but I guess I missed the opportunity to f-close. The thing was, she was getting very drowsy, and when I would steal a kiss from her, she wouldn't open her mouth. Without saying anything, it was understood that I was spending the night. We just cuddled, and I massaged her a little bit.

At 4:30 I woke up to use the bathroom, and she woke up to. I began to escalate, and managed to get her blouse and bra off. I was able to touch her all over and kiss her all over, and even put my hand down the back of her pants (under the underwear), but that's as far as I could get. And still no open mouth kissing. Also, when I would inch down to her vagina with my hand, I sensed resistance. I gave up and went back to sleep cuddling.

In the morning, I escalated some more. It was harder to get her to kiss me, but I was able to kiss her on her breasts, back, neck, etc. I started rubbing her crotch through her pants, and it wasn't doing anything, so I unbuttoned her pants and tried to get my hand down there, and this time she put up blatant resistance with her hand. I unzipped her pants, and pulled them down from the back to expose her ass, rubbed and licked it. Still couldn't get at her vagina or get a kiss. I gave up again and cuddled a little more.

Eventually she got up to go to the bathroom, got dressed, and the whole thing was over. We didn't really talk as the aforementioned went down, and we were both sort of half-asleep too. We hung out and talked for a bit before we left, and then I told her I had to go. The kiss on the mouth goodbye was also close-mouthed.

The thing is, I can't tell if I'm escalating properly, or if I've somehow been nexted or something. I'm not sure what my next move should be. I made no plans to see her again, because I don't have time and I'm leaving town Tuesday for a week.

I guess I should be happy to have gotten this far with a girl who I thought had nexted me the night I met her, but for some reason I feel like I failed.

[Guest]

[QUOTE=Bull Run;21415]
By stopping when she says no, I'm punishing her. By not escalating again, I'm punishing her. Now, she's got to do something positive to get me involved again. Otherwise, I simply walk away.
[/QUOTE]

The post from which this comes from has some really valuable insight, but I wonder if I'm interpreting it correctly. Was it a mistake to continue to plow through the entire night? Should I simply cut my loses with this one now?

I think back to other times I was able to f-close over the span of at least two dates, and the situation seemed much different than the above. There have been other occasions in which I would go on multiple dates with a girl and face LMR every time until the relationship fizzled with no f-close. This reminds me more of that.

The reason why I think this, is because it doesn't seem like she's putting in any effort. I didn't contact her for a few days, and in that span she didn't try to contact me. When I did text her, she replied back as usual, but I feel like I'm leading the interaction too much.

Yeah, I'm overanalyzing this, I know, but it's important to understand these situations for when they come up again in the future.

[Guest]

One thing I noticed is that you rewarded her each time she wouldn't escalate (cuddling, massaging etc..). Think of it like training a dog, if it does something wrong you ignore it and if it does something right you give it attention and praise.

What I would do if I were you is I would text her something random that will peak her curiosity. Something like "omg i just saw your twin!!" and when she responds wanting to know more, and she will, I would ignore it for a few days.

Or I would wait several days and then I would text her "i'm coming over tonight." When I get there I would go instant caveman.

Or I would do a combination of the both.

Or I would not text her at all. It's possible she is a cold fish and the sex is only going to be so-so at first and then it's going to be a fucking nightmare each time you want to smash with continued LMR.

[Guest]

I believe hat she is uncomfortable with sex so early in the "relationship" hence the LMR. She's also Asian, so there's a high probability with that. Typically, Asian girls are freaks, or are reserved in the bedroom. Aditionally, there was little eye contact (meaning she was shy/nervous) and closed mouth kissing. So, she was prob just shy and uncomfortbale with sex.

I don't know the full details of your sexual escalation, but it appears you did enough to get most girls horny enough to fuck.

I agree with what lion said. You rewarded her for unwanted behavior so there is no reason for her to chase you.

I suggest you ignore her for a few days and then text her to meet up. If she declines, give her radio silence--do not text her for a whole week. If she doesnt text you, delete. If she does, text her something brief and try to get her to meet up.

My experience is that if a girl is somewhat interested or is attracted, she would put in some effort; either by texting you or whatever. If you're always the one texting her, it'll prob fizzle out...just my experience...