a shift in my thinking

[Guest]

I rarely type field reports. Ironically my life is usually spent too much in the field to have time for them, but I learned something last week that has created a major shift in my thinking. A shift I hope to transfer to you guys.

I was walking around downtown ft worth just watching all the prettied up women in their makeup, hot clothes, and push up braws bounce around like little kids in a candy shop. The person I had with me another fellow pua has began to notice how I never approach most girls even the many that are obviously in to me due to my abnormally extreme hotness. 5 girls walk past us and all of them are blatently checking me out. He asks "why didn't you approach them, they were blatently checking you out?!" I reply "Idk man I'm just not feelin it tonight" The 5 girls walk on and stand by an old traffic light. Me and my wing sit about a block away and I'm just looking at them. One in particular is doing poses against the traffic light. I look at her, give her a weird look and she giggles. I approach as if magnetically drawn to her. There was no thought, no planned openers, nothing but the suspense of the moment. I said "I was looking at you from over there. I saw you posing against the light for me. I really love it when you pose for me what's your best one?" She sticks out her ass a little and makes a face, I laugh. We began to talk about the most mundane shit. No routines, no high energy just boring old every day stuff, but there was such a connection there. We were both so in to each other that the conversation didn't matter. Nothing mattered, but her and me in that moment. Her friends were calling her she ignored them. I stood there looking in her eyes watching them twinkle in the moonlight, and then a wave of emotion overtook me. I realized that these moments are what its all about. The moments that take you out of this world to some far off place where only joy exists. In life, in love. Now I make each and every moment a time to be cherished. A time to be fully encaptured in whats going on. Fully present, and fully aware of the beauty that is because if you are not looking closely you just might miss moments like that.

[Guest]

wow, you should write romance poems. If I was a chic, that would make me go crazy in my pants. cool post.

[Guest]

yea I actually wrote what happened so I could prerehearse the story because I'm going to tell it to chicks. It's one of those things that I can share with them that will make lmr pretty much zero. I never have lmr or much asd because I focus on actually making the girl comfortable through sharing experiences like this.

[Guest]

what/how do u comfort her in such a way that makes lmr almost zero? I am not good with comfort phase. Zine, do u mind giving us some interaction examples or techniques u do?

[Guest]

I reframe all the objections to having sex with me. I never have sex with a girl until she is begging for it.
I talked about this in another thread I think I will expand on it over the next few days, but the objections to sex would be

1. “This Guy Might Fall in Love Too Quickly
and Stalk Me”
2. Social consequences “My friends / My coworkers
might find out and think I’m a slut”
3. “If I sleep with him early on, it may
ruin the chances of a future relationship or
friendship”

Just deal with these and you shouldn't have much lmr. I could give you techniques and what I say to deal with these, but you will learn much more if you can figure out how to deal with these on your own. With all of these a very effective way to deal with them is to reframe them as if you think the same thing.

1. Tell a story about a time when a girl was overly interested in you and turned needy and how it made you feel, or just accuse her of falling in love with you and stalking you playfully.
2. Ask her if she is trustworthy. Is she the kind of girl that kiss and tells. Show that you will keep your sexual encounters with her to yourself and not brag about them to all of your friends
3. Say shes trying to seduce you and will never call you back the next day. Joke and bust on her for being on the prowl, a “man-eater” who uses guys for sex and then never calls them back. Find out what her views on relationships and romance are, and approve of her views. Relate to them if you can, but don’t fake it. If you don’t see eye-to-eye, at least accept her perspective without judgment. It’s important that she doesn’t see you as a guy who just wants to use her for one night. Sure, you may want to take her home to tonight, but that doesn’t mean you’re going to want to see her again!