Chronicle of my kino/flaking problems

[Guest]

I'm back online, after a month of not having internet. I'll just say that AT&T sucks my balls, but that's enough of that.

OK here's a pickup related problem I've had quite a bit, and it has to do with LMR and escalation. It goes a little something like this...

Have a great time with girl on first date, get girl back to my place. Sit on couch. Chat for a while, plenty of comfort. Girl gives signals that she's ready to be kissed. Girl gets kissed. Full on makeout ensues. A little push/pull. Depending on the girl, we get to a certain stage (example, shirt off and grinding, or pants off but underwear on etc) before she does not allow any more escalation.

Girl leaves on a hot and high note, make out by car, promise to see each other in a couple days/next day/whatever. God damn it looks like she means it.

Talk to girl on phone a couple times, girl never goes out with me again.

WTF???


I actually called an ex of mine who this happened with (we didn't see each other for like a month after, she dated someone else in between, then we rekindled it). I asked her flat out "what goes thru your head, why why why does this keep happening to me?"

Her answer: "You come on a little too strong, and kinda expect too much out of one date. Making out on the first date is too much, you should barely have one kiss that soon."


LOL. I don't live right. Any suggestions welcome.

-Peter Grimm

[Guest]

[quote1212683411=grimm1111]
Her answer: "You come on a little too strong, and kinda expect too much out of one date. Making out on the first date is too much, you should barely have one kiss that soon."


LOL. I don't live right. Any suggestions welcome.

-Peter Grimm
[/quote1212683411]

Well if you are coming on a little too strong that isn't good.

But her answer is B.S.

If the date is going good there is no reason why this can't proceed to sex...unless...you are setting a big time BF frame. If that is the case the girl might be thinking whoah I kinda like this guy I can't sleep with him on the first date otherwise he won't respect me. And I want him to respect me because well I like him and I want him to be my BF.

Second thing. You very well might be coming off as too eager. I would highly recommend using some Push techniques if this is the case. After making out for 5 minutes be like whoah we have to slow down. Or something like that. She will be like WTF. There is a good chance she will reinitiate. There is all sorts of shit on the internet for LMR. Go research.

Seeing that you might be over the top aggressive in a creepy way you might not want to use this but...I use this...Hey lets go to my room(I actually don't usually say this I just grab her hand and start walking). She will almost always question this statement. All you have to say is well we will do the same stuff we are doing here but it will be more comfortable and we will have more room. Anyways I think being in your room will help a little with the LMR.

Get good at LMR. Even the slutty girls who came over knowing damn well they wanted to fuck put up LMR.

[Guest]

[quote1212684395=playercool]Get good at LMR. Even the slutty girls who came over knowing damn well they wanted to fuck put up LMR.[/quote1212684395]

So true, so true!!!

[Guest]

So ironic that LMR, since we all know why they're there :)

yeah the push techniques are your best option :) gotta get her to the state she's ready to pounce on you :) throw some teasing in too :)

[Guest]

"We're not gonna have sex, I'm just gonna tease you"
Put her hand on your johnson when things get hot and heavy"See what your doing to me?"
"your seducing me"

Proven*cough* to work ;)


Push pull with them. 2 steps forward, and 1 step back.

[Guest]

Fine and good, but the question wasn't so much about how to avoid LMR, we all know there are some cases where you're going to get LMR no matter how good your push/pull calibration is and you're just not gonna lay her that night. She might have a rule, etc etc.

The question was more to do with flake prevention in these cases. If you go for the lay and don't get it but get close, how to overcome her "buyers remorse?"

[Guest]

You overcome the flaking by making HER want you... when it's her idea and she's chasing you, she's gonna want more. That's the whole point of the push-pull -- she thinks its her idea even tho you totally gamed her. And she can never say 'you're too aggressive' because she becomes as much of an initiator or more than you -- if you've been doing your cocky-funny/teasing, you've already told her several times by the time you're making out how she's trying to seduce you, you're not going to sleep with her, etc ;) you gotta play it off the whole time like she's the one all over you, not vice versa

[Guest]

Update on this one: so the last girl that inspired this post called me up randomly out of the blue, so I guess I was getting my panties in a bunch for nothing. It is ON. When I talked to her on the phone her voice was trembling - there is so much sexual tension here it's gonna feel GREAT to resolve it.

As for the others that this has happened with, well I did actually end up nailing one (after a month of not seeing her though), and the other actually just I never heard from.


On another note, the call ended strangely. Me: "I'll talk to you later." Her: "Which is...?" Me: "um, later?" Her: "(sigh) when is that?"

What, like I have to schedule an appointment to call her? Sounds like some Cosmo bullshit to me, let me know if you've had similar experience. I told her I'd have my people call her people and set something up.


Note to Playercool - Good job AMOGging me on your reply there bud, I didn't even notice it before but props! :) "creepy aggressive," "eager," lol great tooling frame. You're actually very skilled at that. If I hadn't met you in person I might be irked by it or think you were trying to prove something, but I know you're a super cool guy, don't worry.

[Guest]

Hahah Grimm...

I was only saying that based on your ex's statement. All I can do is speculate on what is written. I don't know you well enough to base it on anything else.

I meant no disrespect Sir.

[Guest]

[quote1213232318=playercool]
Hey lets go to my room(I actually don't usually say this I just grab her hand and start walking). She will almost always question this statement. All you have to say is well we will do the same stuff we are doing here but it will be more comfortable and we will have more room. Anyways I think being in your room will help a little with the LMR.
[/quote1213232318]

Playercool:

I love that.
Its like framing the whole thing as "You and I both know why we're here.". Awesome.