FR: Punched In the Face

[Guest]

First time in Fort Worth and I get beat up. Everyone was saying how easy Fort Worth girls are, that I have to be AFC to get them. I was suprised at how many young people I saw out and about (there were even babies!). We get to The Library and I actually like this place a lot, I'd definitely go back. Myself, Picture Perfect, and Bull Run were giving each other stupid openers that we had to open with. The goal was to try and recover. PP gave me an opener, I totally forgot what it was. It was basically just bragging, like "I'm financially stable..." anyway, it was three comments about myself and it opened really well. I then made the girls give me their three best qualities however the fatty friend thought she was "mysterious" by being quiet. Ha! Joke's on her, I didn't care about her qualities.

I gave PP a great opener: "Hi. I'm 25. I'm unemployed and I live with my parents. If you ever gave me your phone number I would call you 15 times a day just to talk about the weather. Do you want to be my girlfriend?" and it opened phenomenal, they were into it. Gave BR Vectors opener "What kind of porn do you like?" and the girl just kept on walking. It was pretty funny. Later in the night that girls friend asked BR what kind of porn he likes so I consider that a success. They gave me the opener "I hate your shoes" which is a terribly shitty opener. So I went to the girl "Hey, you look very nice tonight...I just don't like your shoes" and she was so into it before I said the shoes bit, she got pretty mad and tried to wave me away. Of course I never tuck tail and run so I stayed there until they walked away. She had some ridiculous water buffalo friend who was really trying to get me to leave. Whatever girl.

Gave PP an opener, you have to go sit at a booth with these 2 girls, don't say anything at all, get out your phone and txt somebody. That's a money opener and it worked well. Gave BR the opener that he has to take my switchblade comb that I had, walk by a table, open the comb and comb a girls hair with it. They were kinda weirded out but it worked ok. I also gave BR the opener "I like your tits" but I'm not sure if we ever found the right candidate.

Later the girl I opened with the shoes bit kept reopening me so it must work ok. I brought out my switchblade comb to much hysterical laughter and let them play with it. I was messing around with shoes girl pretending like I had to have my comb back right that second and out of the blue water buffalo punches me square in the face. I had been ignoring her that whole time, she had been saying something to me but I just didn't register or care. So I was fucking furious about that, I can't hit a girl so I went outside and got the Fuzz and they wrote her a f'ing ticket. If I had punched her I would have been in cuffs. Ratio was there, gotta say it's badass rolling with a lawyer. So there's the whole ordeal outside with the Fuzz and them writing her a ticket. Ratio said she was crying but trying to hold it in. That almost makes it worthwhile that she was crying. I wanted to hit her so bad. With one punch I would have knocked out her teeth or broken her nose, I was so furious. Girl thinks she can punch people just because she has a vagina. If she had been a man and punched me I literally would have kicked her to death with my boots. But of course I won't hit a girl.

I had no choice after that except to get super drunk. So I did. It was either get drunk or get into a fight, which Bull Run and I almost did with some knucklehead who kept running into him. I ran into the whore's friends later in the night and they were all apologizing and saying they don't like that girl blah blah. I got one girl who witnessed it so say she would be my witness later on. I plan on calling the detective Monday morning and pursuing this further (even though it didn't hurt at all and I don't even have a fat lip or anything). I mean seriously, if I had punched her I would be in fucking jail right now, not get some bs ticket.

Fort Worth could have been really fun. I plan on going back and getting my sarge on. There were definitely some good looking ladies out and about.

Urban Lion Strikes Again *Lion Noises*

[Guest]

Haha some girl Karate chopped your ass.

Glad you got her busted. I agree she should have been in cuffs and sitting in the slammer. Equal Rights Equal Punishment.

On a different note though I do like all the openers and pushing each other to open. Talk about getting over AA quick. In my head one reason this works is because your body language is probably really good when you are forced into a set. And that shoe NEG is fucking MONEY!

[Guest]

lol. guess my "confrontation" the other week at cowboys was nothing!

don't understand how she didn't get hauled away for assault and battery and thrown in the clinker?? what was her ticket for?

[Guest]

Contact assault. Apparently that's all you get for a fury fisted face punch.

[Guest]

Ratio was out there arguing for her to get a worse ticket. Hilarious.

BTW Lion...you're hard as fuck to walk when you're drunk.

[Guest]

damn, wish I could have seen that. Lion getting decked by Snuffelupagus

[Guest]

bleh~ by the time I got there they were done with the "give an opener game" I'd have loved that. I have an adventure from last night as well...I'll make a new topic

[Guest]

I dont understand why yall love the library so much. It's always sausage central there and hard as hell to get a drink. I want to roll with yall next time and there's a few places we can jump to but library should be just a stop.

[Guest]

LMFAO im still fuckin laughing...wow!

[Guest]

Oh and Lion great job an getting that fat bitch a ticket. Maybe after having to pay for it she wont be able to eat so much now and everyone wins!