Some thoughts on C&F, pros and cons.

[Guest]

As promised, I've written down some thoughts on C&F. These are just my opinions, some of them could be wrong, whatever. My basic ideas. Let's start with some DO's and DON'Ts on C&F.





WHAT COCKY FUNNY IS....


1.) Cocky/Funny DOES work. I've seen it done very well a hundred times. It's also easy to understand why it works. When done correctly, C&F should convey that you are CONFIDENT because you are UNAFRAID TO BE DIFFERENT FROM THE PACK and UNAFRAID OF OFFENDING HER/ UNMOVED BY HER REACTION. It's this reason and this reason alone that it appeals to girls. This handy little technique sub-communicates this attitude, which implies a ton of value. (so it follows then that DELIVERY with confidence becomes important. if i were gonna do this method, i'd be LOUD, be STRONG, mindful of eye contact etc etc)

I would suggest that humor itself is not what attracts women. Why don't comedians have groupies (Dane Cook aside), whereas rock stars do? Even ugly rock stars. Why are Brad Pitt, George Clooney, Johnny Depp, etc considered the "hottest" male celebrities while rare is the woman who gives a fuck about Adam Sandler or Robin Williams?
If that argument doesn't do it for you, try this one. What is the survival value of humor in and of itself? None. Confidence is an indicator of success. If a woman meets a confident man, he probably has shit going for him. If she aligns with him, she can get some of those resources. The funny caveman ain't gonna bring home any meat to the cave.

Humor works when it is an indicator or a method of displaying confidence, which is very much of value to women universally. Goofy humor is pretty much irrelevant, and can even come across as attention-starved which is extremely UNATTRACTIVE. I think we even get this in the community at an intuitive level. Otherwise, why would we make such a distinction between being the "confident, funny guy" vs. the "dancing monkey?" I propose that it's because the humor itself is not relevant, it's merely a delivery method.

So once again. C&F is COCKY, but also funny. Funny is a trojan horse, cocky is the fucking army that's gonna hack shit up. And the way you display cockiness/confidence is that it should display a certain fearlessness and non-reaction-seeking behavior.



2.) C&F is EASY. That's I think the biggest appeal to aspiring PUA's. It works right out of the box, no need to put in too much work to get the hang of it. To me, I'd say that's it's best selling point.


3.) C&F works better on party girls, and stupider girls. There are some girls who can see through it quickly, while for others it takes time. Because after all, as stated in point #1 the technique works by IMPLYING value that you may/may not have as opposed to DISPLAYING value that you really do have. This also means that it is more difficult to stay in long sets and to keep girls around for a very long time.


4.) C&F is a pretty good starting point for beginners who want a natural method, think inner game is slow and a bunch of bullshit, and have a lack of confidence that just 1.) "being themselves" 2.) "being cool" 3.) "being confident" can get them girls (to me, that's the whole answer to the game). I've seen guys who run C&F, get some success, and then actually BECOME confident because of the success feedback loop. That's awesome. The abundance of girls will then make them cool, and laziness will make them be themselves, and everything will feed on itself to make them better and better.




WHAT COCKY FUNNY IS NOT....



1.) C&F is not good for guys who are naturally very good-looking, drive a ferrari to the club, have girls hanging on their arms already or have a lot immediate apparent value. It comes across arrogant. Ironically, if you ALREADY have attraction and you try to run too much C&F, you will blow yourself out. Here's why... You gain no confidence points (because you were already assumed to be confident, hence the attraction), and you put the girl on the defensive so much that you actually cause anger, which she backward-rationalizes to be a loss of attraction since you have very little investment. Does Tom Cruise do C&F? Brad Pitt? Nope. Here is a good general rule of thumb to take to heart. The more apparent value you have, or the more value you know you have in the mind of a woman, the less value you should try to display. Focus instead on GIVING her value in one sense or another.

That shouldn't be so hard to understand. Try an analogy. The rich guy who is low-key and gets you in to clubs is cool. The rich guy who flashes his roll to show people up is just an asshole and an easy target to mock, and if he gets run over by a bus people will laugh. C&F generally has a weakness in that it has a "show you up" kind of vibe to it. Much like you would probably not hesitate to throw a tomato at the guy with the roll, a girl is likely to blow you out HARD if your cocky/funny is seen as bragging. Confidence is worth more than dollars to a woman. If you have a lot of it, focus on generosity.


2.) C&F is not good for socially weird guys who can't calibrate it. Some guys seem like they just like the power trip. These guys like to use humor/ C&F as a mask because they are afraid to show the world who they really are and what they really think. That, to me, does not display confidence, it shows fear, avoidance and try-hardness. It means you care too much about the situation which is pretty uncool.

Consider this for a second. So many guys in this community came in frustrated because they tried chumpy AFC conversation with women and women walked all over them. Then they try this method C&F, which A. allows them to have a moderate spike in their success with girls and B. allows them to get back at those women who walked all over them. These are the male equivalents of the feminist man-haters.

These guys are often the biggest proponents of C&F, but on the other hand, they are the ones who benefit the least. What these guys really need is some inner game, and some re-alignment of their own thoughts and beliefs. Which brings me to #3.

3.) C&F is not really necessary! Even if you can calibrate so you don't get blown out, do you really want a method that makes you have to "switch gears" halfway through from attraction to rapport (as if you naturally had two personalities or something?), or only works on "party girls?"

I'm gonna say something, and I hope it gets through. You are a MAN. Women love men naturally. Women LOVE THE COCK. If you don't believe me, pick up your cell, call one over right now and finger her till she cums and just watch her face. Women LOVE men. You don't need to BE anything other than what you are to get girls. You just need to not fuck up.


Now I'm NOT saying walk up to a girl and have "hopes and dreams" vulnerability chump talks. That's actually a bad idea.

But I will say that the reason AFC conversation didn't work for you in the past was because you came at the whole game of interacting with women from the wrong motives. You were needy. You cared too much. You wanted something from her. You were un-cool and annoying. The quick-fix remedy of C&F covers these things for the most part, so you experience something of a boost to your game. You pass shit tests, you fool the girl into believing that you're this confident, non-reactive guy of her dreams. Until she figures you out. You have fun, snappy conversations that look good. But should you stay and talk too long, the guise is up, and you lose the girl.


I propose the following - how about you actually DON'T care so much. You actually DON'T be needy/weird. You actually ARE cool. Yes, that is a choice you can make and well within your control. It just means you have to ACCEPT YOURSELF.

Then with this inner strength, go up to a girl at a bar and for experiment's sake, your opener is to introduce yourself. Follow up by asking a girl what she does for a living, or if she comes here often, does she have pets, or whatever other boring AFC, non-game question you can think of that only a couple months ago you're pretty sure would have blown you out. See if you get blown out now. I've done it a hundred times, and guess what?

It's the ATTITUDE that matters.


I'm not saying everyone should drop the C&F. Especially if it suits your natural personality, or if it's fun for you. There's a lot of guys here who are awesome with it. Take Top Dog for example, or Playercool when he's running that style of game, those guys have a C&F style but it's congruent to them. But to the masses, I'm saying if you're gonna adopt the style, then peel it back a layer and understand the gears and wheels and why it works, so that you can tailor it to your game with more finesse and calibration. If you look at the best guys in our lair who are using it, it's clear that they have an understanding at least intuitively WHY what they are doing works. It also just seems to fit in with their natural personality. It's an extension of them, it doesn't define them.

Just don't think it's the snappy comment or even the laugh that's getting you the girl. Laughs are fleeting. Snappy comments don't kill. And please don't think of shit tests as a tennis match where you battle back and forth, and where WINNING that match is what's getting you the girl, because you have some bone to pick with women.

No. It's the exposure of your confident inner nature that's so attractive to them.

Peel it back.

[Guest]

Excellent. I nominate for Best Of.

[Guest]

Great analysis...i would nominate as well.

One item to further clarify....i think it's also VERY important that it's calibrated WHEN you do it. There's right and wrong times... It's also dangerous and misleading to newbies that it gets labeled as a 'style'. It doesn't mean you are always like that, or don't know when to drop it, it's just a C&F line dropped at the right time can really work wonders.

[Guest]

Good writing, very good points. Glad I saw this.

[Guest]

got my vote