Page 1 of 1

Frame during approach

PostPosted: Thu Oct 01, 2009 11:34 pm
by jwars
I tend to have some approach anxiety, particularly at the beginning of the night or as I'm doing my first approach of the day. So, I was wondering what types of frames do you guys put yourself in to make the approach easier?

Re: Frame during approach

PostPosted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 10:56 am
by Scoundrel
You just have to get warmed up. The first two or three don't count. It's sort of like going on stage. After you get a few approaches behind you you get into the vibe and things start to click.

Re: Frame during approach

PostPosted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 2:50 pm
by RockStar
frame:you're gonna let her sleep with you. :) it's money.


rockstar

Re: Frame during approach

PostPosted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 7:33 pm
by Scoundrel
LOL Rockstar is right. Just assume she is going to sleep with you. It's not if, it's when.

Re: Frame during approach

PostPosted: Mon Oct 05, 2009 12:40 am
by Gamble
My favorite frame when approaching is "I have to decide whether I sleep with them because they already want to fuck me." I use this frame a lot and it just makes me realize that it doesn't matter what happens because I am the one making decisions and I know that other people aren't watching and judging my actions.

Re: Frame during approach

PostPosted: Mon Oct 05, 2009 7:16 pm
by Tribulus1000
Couple of things that are good for this...

1. Reframes : Think: "Maybe she'll like my shirt..... maybe she'll like my smile....... maybe she'll take me home" This is as you put one foot in front of the other and walk over there.
2. Personally, I find that once I am in a conversation its easier. I settle down and I'm not as jumpy. The act of putting yourself there is what matters. I do feel that initial burst of anxiety or pure momentum is ego based.
Thus....
3. If it is ego-based, then use the ego to your advantage and pat yourself on the back for having done a warmup or two or three.
4. Ross had something where he said play Rocky and Bullwinkle's theme song in your head. I also heard Richard Bandler is said to have imagined crowds cheering for him in the background as he spoke to a woman.