Help my friend get out of his shell

[jakomo]

So I have a friend who is a complete hermit. He has no socializing ability with women. His approach anxiety is crazy high. His body language sucks more than a pornstar. What can I do to help him?

[Skaldgrimnir]

Well, he could do what I am doing. Approach, approach, approach. I flunk and I fail...but at least I am approaching.

Take him to a clothing store, have him try on a hat or a shirt, or something, and have him ask women "Excuse me, can I get your opinion on this shirt?" It would be a relatively non-threatening way to approach, and he might get some good opinions while he is at it.

You stay in the background and kick him in the ass to motivate him.

[jakomo]

Well, he could do what I am doing. Approach, approach, approach. I flunk and I fail...but at least I am approaching.

Take him to a clothing store, have him try on a hat or a shirt, or something, and have him ask women "Excuse me, can I get your opinion on this shirt?" It would be a relatively non-threatening way to approach, and he might get some good opinions while he is at it.

You stay in the background and kick him in the ass to motivate him.

I totally try to do that and I take him to places and tell him to do such and such and he still pussies out.

This isn't a guy who will just go up and talk to people, he's even too shy to ask someone for directions (seriously), although he IS improving, but he still won't interact with strangers.

So what I really need is like something that will just open his mind to strangers. Some book maybe, some kinda exhibit to make him open up.

[The Lisenby Effect]

...has he read the game?
and show him... say look, this is what you COULD have by your own examples...
just pound it in his head... you live in the stands or on the field, you chose...

[Kit]

I recommend going out and having a coffee or a beer where you can sit on a patio on a nice day away from too many people so you can talk openly. Ask him what he thinks his anxiety if from...

Insecure about his appearance?
Thinks he will not have anything interesting to say?

I mean what specifically does he fear? Once you determine that, address it. Help him get a hairsytle that makes him confident or tattoos or dress differently. If he doesn't think he has anything interesting to say, learn some mind teasers, magic tricks, mind reading, anything like that. Women love to be asked questions they can think through. They like to be entertained when they are out, not asked what they do for a living or who they are going to vote for (snooze/boring!) They want to have fun. Come up with some fun things to stimulate a woman's mind. This makes you seem fun and intelligent and like you know a lot of interesting things and without her knowing it, she becomes the one needing to demonstrate value.

Remember, why do women date musicians or artists? It's because they are different, creative and entertain. No other reason. Just be able to creative, different and entertain them and it won't matter what you do for a living.

Good luck.

[The Lisenby Effect]

Remember, why do women date musicians or artists? It's because they are different, creative and entertain. No other reason. Just be able to creative, different and entertain them and it won't matter what you do for a living.

Good luck.

yea that's a part of it...
but no other reason?
Like... money?

[Dragon]

First crawl, than walk and than run.

He has to learn to socialize with people first.
Get him to meet some of your other friends in a small group get together.
You might want to brief him on who your friends are first.

Than maybe a bigger group of both boys and girls.

I think strangers would be too far of a stretch.

Was he home schooled or something??
Or strict parents?

[Kit]

yea that's a part of it...
but no other reason?
Like... money?

Money? You are talking less than 1% of musicians and artists then. Since when is money associated with a musician or artist?

Anyway... true some women go after money, but those women are fucking other guys on the side.