Dallas PUA

One of my sticking points coming back into the game now is my, what you might call "nice-guy-ness" or state change.

It occurs whenever I open a set.

My body language is fine and I'm relaxed. As soon as I get a positive response, I start to smile too much and even peck! (I hate that I do this)

So the other night I discovered accidentally a way to get around this.

Its unusual but its more for training you to be calm and relaxed than it is for generating attraction.

(Note: This is not standard game. It is an exercise to calm the body and the mind.)

The idea is to talk about some mundane or unusual topic. Preferably something from your experience.

For me it was a bad blind date. This caused me to be real and to not try to impress her in the first five minutes of convo.

So I told it to another girl and another and pretty soon I had a boring routine which I can now use for the first five minutes.

It actually contains a social proof DHV spike.

Blind Dates
Have you ever been on a blind date?
The reason I'm asking is that I was on one yesterday and it was horrible. My coworker wanted to set me up because I'm like the new single guy work and everyone likes me.

So she sets me up on this date with this girl and this chick is really boring. She's 26 and has never been out on a date.

Now I gotta admit, I'm not the "formal date type" anyway. I'm more of a "let's hang out and get to know eachother type of guy."
So I get there and she's there with the girl who set me up and her husband.
And I thought it would be the two of us alone.

Note to self: Never Again....EVER!

So I sit down and this girl is really quiet. Its unnerving. Have you ever been around some guy who is just too quiet? Its weird.

We start talking and its akward from the beginning. And the husband starts talking about the GM Assembly plant in Arlington and how its so cool how the cars start out as metal and they're assembled and the doors and the quality control...zzzzzzzzzz......Gawd it was aweful.

I kept staring out the window hoping someone would rescue me. And this gas bag went on for like an hour!

I kept trying to talk to her because I wanted to get to know her. She was really cute but I wanted to see what she was really like.

For me, I need to get to know someone for a while.
(I'm picky and selective).

It was so awkward and weird and it went on for like 2 hours and I just had to cut off the date abruptly when an awkward silence came.
I was like "I gotta go." Ya know the "I've got.....umm....things to do....today." kinda thing. (take a few steps away them come back)

So how do you meet guys? Have you ever met someone (sp) that you felt totally connected to?
-----------------------end routine-----------------------------
The important things to do here are to be really low key when you talk about this.

You're not jittery, nervous and trying to impress.
Don't bail or leave the set either. Force yourself to be "mundane".
Don't laugh, smile or diffuse the sexual tension in any way.
Don't seek validation.

In contrast with DHV routines where you're trying to impress on some level with these, you're not trying to impress at all. You're just sharing something from your life. In this case, a really awkward moment.

Girls like relationships and the unknown.

They like to give advice on relationships and you can always chat safely with them about the topic of relationships.

Tyler's "I like salad" opener is the same idea.

Its an easy segue into a connection pattern.

The idea is that once you learn how to open without being nervous or jittery, you can then switch back to standard game and do whatever rountine you wish to do.

Why do you think that story is mundane? I could see myself telling it and having girls be realy interested.

I like to small talk at the very beginning of a set. I've learned It's best to keep it neutral at the beginning because both people even though it sounds like they aren't saying much are saying a shitload on a nonverbal level. You are calibrating your bodies to sync better with each other. I also believe that by being too much higher energy than her you are performing. It's afc because does she deserve this energy? Nah probably not. Make her earn even your energy because it is a form of interest.
Now I know if some guys read that theyd say oh then you are always boring how does that work??! No I'm not always boring on an open it's all about calibration and being aware of what's going on in the moment.

Fuzz wrote:Why do you think that story is mundane? I could see myself telling it and having girls be realy interested.

Its mundane because I'm not talking about my stripper ex-girlfriend who's driving and wants to give me a blow job.
Its more of a "this is my life" kinda story. Its true. It has the same "Game"-like structure story but its missing fireworks.

This was a turning point for me. I sometimes do these posts so I can catalog things going on around me.
You can look back and see old posts.

The thing I learned here was you don't have to be high energy and super DHV in order to get attraction.
Attraction is there regardless. And sometimes its what you're NOT doing.

Why would you not want to be smiling?

101998 wrote:Why would you not want to be smiling?

For this, I would suggest not smiling. Smile between sets. Its said in a boring, matter of fact kinda way.

Smiling is fine. I love to smile. Especially at hot babes. But the point here is not to be seeking rapport.

You're just matter-of-fact and monotone.

Yeah it goes against everything the community teaches about energy. And don't worry about your body language either.

Pick a story from your life and just walk up...do an opener...and about 2-4 minutes in start doing your story.
Anything.

The point of this is not being SUPER CRAZY OVER-THE-TOP, SMILING FROM EAR TO EAR, HIGH ENERGY GUY.

I've been that guy.

Trust me, you can't sustain the energy. How do you keep that up all night? Cocaine I guess?

With this, we show her a little of who we really are. We're not up in her face with "HEY GUYS!!! I NEED A FEMALE OPINION...WHAT DO YOU THINK OF WOMEN'S RIGHT TO VOTE?"

You don't need to talk really freakin loud like you're the most powerful guy on two legs either.

My friend Manish is lower energy and he does ok. Some of you guys will nod because you know him.

it shows that you can be normal, and as probably normal people themselves they can really relate to that. If you want to look at it in community terms then its the valley between one emotional spike and the next one that makes each emotion you have her experience more meaningful.

Trust me, you can't sustain the energy. How do you keep that up all night? Cocaine I guess?

Or you could just be having fun? It's easy to sustian high energy when you're having fun.

With this, we show her a little of who we really are. We're not up in her face with "HEY GUYS!!! I NEED A FEMALE OPINION...WHAT DO YOU THINK OF WOMEN'S RIGHT TO VOTE?"

What's wrong with that? It shows the girl you have a great sense of humor and are not seeking her approval. Also it will likely lead to an intelligent conversation if the girl is smart & confident enough.

You don't need to talk really freakin loud like you're the most powerful guy on two legs either.

Or in my case three.

Westfall

Penis.

Westfall wrote:

Trust me, you can't sustain the energy. How do you keep that up all night? Cocaine I guess?

Or you could just be having fun? It's easy to sustian high energy when you're having fun.

Exactly. It's easy to remain enthusiastic and high energy if you are actually into the interaction. I can understand it being a chore when the girl hasn't really qualified herself to you (i.e. sure she's hot but she's boring). But, once the girl has qualified herself has given you IOIs the interaction shouldn't feel chore-like and as such you should be able to sustain that energy level.