Need help with escalation

[Guest]

Hey everyone, I have been lurking here for awhile and trying to figure out my game in the field.

I seem to have a sticking point that I am having some trouble with.

Physical escalation seems to be a big problem for me. I think I have my verbal game down good and can create attraction, but I always miss the window to start escalating. There is some mental blockage and I guess self doubt in my head. I am worried that if I start escalating that the girl will think I am weird or creepy and be freaked out by me. Once I kiss the girl it is smooth sailing for me because something clicks in my head that she is interested in me romantically at this point. But leading up to the kiss is the problem.

So any help on this topic would be greatly appreciated.

How do you escalate specifically? Do you briefly touch her on the arm, then briefly touch her on the thigh, then touch her face, then kiss her, etc? I have no clue how to escalate smoothly up to the kiss.

[Guest]

I need more information.

[URL]http://www.the-spearhead.com/2011/10/06/the-childishness-of-the-public-discourse-about-rape/[/URL]

Does this explain anything you are feeling? If not couldn't elloborate a little more on what is going through your head?

[Guest]

No, I'm not really worried about being accused of false rape or anything like that. I'm worried that when I start touching the girl and attempting to escalate that I am going to come off as a weirdo and creepy. Even if we are on a date and she is giving me IOIs, it doesn't seem to click that she is interested in me romantically until we kiss, so everything leading up to that point I feel awkward about. Say that we are on a day 2 and I start touching her...I am worried that she is going to shrug away or say "what are you doing?" or something along those lines. At the core I feel like she shouldn't be interested in me romantically, so if I try to act like I am it will be a disaster and that it will come as a complete surprise to her.

Now I know looking at it logically, that if she is on a date with me that she is somewhat interested in me, and I will be better off to touch her too much than not at all. There is something in my mind holding me back, I don't know if it's low self esteem and thinking "I don't deserve her, why should she be interested in me?" or what the deal is. Once I do kiss her, something in my brain tells me that she is interested in me now since we kissed and that it is obvious that I like her. It seems to be a combination of self doubt, low self esteem, worried it's going to come off as awkward, and thinking that she doesn't see me as romantic material.

Does that make sense? This problem is really holding me back, I have lost many a girl because I was afraid to start escalating and get touchy with her. Anything past high fives and thumb wrestling I get antsy about because after that I am stating that I am interested in her sexually.