Mandatory Social Responses

[Guest]

Over the last 2 months I have conducted an experiment. The experiment was to see how women reacted to generic social queues. There is nothing especially scientific about my experiment other than the fixed number of test subjects and the specific stimulus given. My test subjects where mature women (16-whatever). Today, I compiled my results. I wanted to share the experiment with you guys, and I also wanted to get your insight into how one can best capitalize on this behavior.

For the specifics, in my daily life, I encountered 100 women who I tested with the below over a two month period. I recorded my findings in my personal journal.

Me (smiling, body language open)- > How are you?
Her- > Good, How are you?
Me- > Great, thanks for asking.
Her- > (Smiling)

I include the body language because I feel that it is important to note that in 83 of my 100 encounters, this was the outcome of the body language. Only 2 did not respond with a responding "How are you?"

What this tells me, is no secret and has been written on before. That people are pre-programmed to respond to certain queues in certain ways. My question is, from a pick up perspective, can you use this social programming to your advantages in opening sets or in creating attraction? Can anyone provide some examples of how they have done this? I realize it is all anecdotal but in understanding this phenomenon and how best to use it, any material will help.

[Guest]

Just curious, what exactly do you mean by "open body language," aside from say arms not crossed?

[Guest]

Perhaps, it is good to demonstrate with pictures what I mean when I say "Open Body Language." However, mainly I mean genuine smiles and strong eye contact.

Bar none, the number one most important body language indicator a person has is their face. Therefore, genuine smiles are a must. There are three things that dictate a genuine smile. Radial wrinkling around the eyes, a narrowing of the eyes, tightness in the brow and upward tensed cheek muscles.

Example of a genuine smile:
[IMG]http://sapientology.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/Genuine-Smile.jpg[/IMG]

Example of a polite smile:
[IMG]http://sapientology.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/Compulsive-Smiler.jpg[/IMG]

Further, I mean open body language:

Leaning in, stillness, extremities pointed toward the target, nodding.

I employed all of these but didn't record specifics.

[Guest]

Yes, you can. You'll want to apply framing in these instances. I do it all the time.

This reminds me of the "syran wrap" thing I did at a lair talk a while back. Framing is going to be your best tool to capitalize on this phenom.

[Guest]

Can you give some examples Finesse?

[Guest]

If you know someone will say or do something, you can basically predict the future, right?

So, how hard is it then, to implement the frame or threads you want to implement?

For a more specific example, give me something you might consistently due on your pick ups.

[Guest]

Last night, I had an f-close. I had met her before socially but never hit on her. She's a lawyer in town, gotta love hot lawyers. I was at OTB with some friends drinking some 'ritas and she was in a set with her friends. Mine decided to bounce, so I joined her set. Anyway, because I knew her, I opened the set with, "Hi, How are you?" then joined them by just sitting down. After getting the requisite round of introductions to her friends I sat an let them continue their conversation. During a lull in the conversation I took over and did the only routine I still use which is Ring routine, after that, I reached hook point, started to ignore her in favor of a friend of hers and it just came together when she started trying to qualify me.

So let's see. In my pickups, I consistently run ring routine. It's a crutch but it works and I love it. I will consistently open with either a simple "hi, how are ya?" if I know them somehow, or if I don't then I tend to use a transitory that they are socially obligated to respond to like, Is that drink good? -> Blah blah -> Hi, Im Steve- > Blah Blah.-> Fluff Fluff->DHV of some sort or eject if I get rattled which still happens. Once hook point is reached, I will normally stop talking and listen. I get a good idea of group dynamic this way and can adjust accordingly. Then I pick my target, I pick my patsy and I try to do some push/ pull between them until my target starts to qualify me. After that, it is qualify back, escalate, and close.

[Guest]

Ok, think about the ring routine. It works and you've used it how many times?

How often do the girls answers vary? Back when I used it, not much. You can essentially narrow it down to 3 or 4 types of responses, no?

The I'm totally interested.
The I'm slightly interested.
The I'm slightly bored.
The I need to get the hell out of here, types. Right?

Let's take, "Is that drink good?" This is a yes/no/ehh question. These are really the only 3 responses you'll ever get, besides the very rare bitch shield of "Why are you talking to me?"

In these particular cases it doesn't really matter because they are typically filler and plowing routines, but what happens if you want to imply you only like bad girls? Or what happens if you want her to give you a message? What happens if things are going well, and you want her to be the one making the investment? How would you frame that?

An answer is: you could use this new knowledge of mandatory social responses to frame it.

Think about it this way. How do you get someone to talk about something without you bringing it up explicitly? That, among other things, is called frame control and leading. It's just an indirect version, which I contend is really the most effective type if you wish to retain the faced of freedom.

Question, how could you get a girl to talk about sex, without you bringing it up? How could you get her to bring it up?

[Guest]

[QUOTE=finesse]In these particular cases it doesn't really matter because they are typically filler and plowing routines, but what happens if you want to imply you only like bad girls? Or what happens if you want her to give you a message? What happens if things are going well, and you want her to be the one making the investment? How would you frame that? [/QUOTE]

If I were to imply, I only liked bad girls, I would probably say something like... "Are you naughty?(answer) [regardless of answer] (sigh) It's never gonna work between us." Depending on how serious or light I make that last statement, it can either end the interaction if she is seriously not a naughty girl, or it can be a false dis-qualifier and a joke.

If I wanted her to make more investment, I would probably just take my attention away and let her chase after me. I'm not sure how I could make a statement that would convey that I want her to make more investment, without coming off as needy.

I'm not quite sure I understand the question about sending a message?
[QUOTE=finesse]
Question, how could you get a girl to talk about sex, without you bringing it up? How could you get her to bring it up? [/QUOTE]

I guess the questions here would have to be broken up. Because frames have to be set before you can even get this far. Questions have to be answered in her mind such as , Is he safe?,Is he discreet? Seems to me these are just two of a large number of possible questions arising in her sub-conscious.

To overcome this, I guess I might do a future projection with heavy emphasis on sensuality or heavily romantic/sexual overtones. I also might use anticipated regret to paint a picture of loneliness/sadness at some point in the future and then provide a behavioral plan (ie. or you could kiss me now and avoid that lonely empty feeling in your bed tonight) that allowed her to avoid that regret, thereby inciting change. I never have tried the utilizing anticipated regret, but I imagine it could be a really powerful tool for frame setting and influence.

[Guest]

[QUOTE]I guess the questions here would have to be broken up. Because frames have to be set before you can even get this far. Questions have to be answered in her mind such as , Is he safe?,Is he discreet? Seems to me these are just two of a large number of possible questions arising in her sub-conscious.[/QUOTE]

You understand it, you answered it right here. Mandatory social responses are great for getting these answers out of the way much faster. The frames that have to be set before you get to give her your seed are the ones I am talking about.