Call or Text?

[Guest]

I'm almost certain this one's bound to be a flake, but I'd like your advice anyway.

I met her on friday -- we'll call her HBAsian because she's asian. I was at a bar hanging around a very attractive girl who is a friend of mine. HBAsian opened me up, asking me if I was in some local band I had never heard of before. At first I was honest and said no, then she persisted, and I told her yes, to fuck with her a little. And it went back and forth like that for a little while.

She asked me for my number right off the bat, she asked me later on if I was dating the girl I was hanging out with. I asked her for drugs and she gave them to me. She bought me a drink and said, "I've never bought a drink for a guy before." I replied with something like, "Well, I'm pretty special." to which she had a "yeah right" sort of expression, to which I didn't react.

I isolated her and we were hanging outside talking. I learned that she used to work with my friend, and knew some of the same people I know. Suddenly I noticed that she got a text message, and she quickly said "Wait right here, I'll be right back." She never came back, and I went on with my night mingling with other people.

Before bed, I texted her with:

(taken from elsewhere on this board, a great great line)

Me: It was a pleasure meeting you last night. You were handsome, charming, and witty.

(her reply came an hour later, but I was already asleep)

HBAsian: Aww thank you ! It was nice meeting you too.

The next day I wrote to her

Me: But LA is still cooler than San Francisco

This was referring to a debate we had briefly at one point in the evening, might have been a negligible part of our conversation, but I wanted to create a push pull tension, and that's all I could come up with at the time. Anyway, she didn't write back. And frankly, I didn't even think she'd reply to the first one, since I never felt I worked enough to have her invested in the interaction. And the way she sort of left that evening proves it. Nonetheless, I have a number and I need the practice. I know it's possible though not probable to turn these long fuses into short ones. What should my next step be?

[Guest]

Man, this whole thing screams to me that she just isn't that in to you. She took off and disappeared while you were hanging out, and then she refuses to text anything beyond a cursory acknowledgment.

I would next her myself. If our path's crossed again, or she opened me, then I would proceed as normal.

On the other hand, she did give you a number, and that was her idea. Call her and set up a D2, if she flakes, you know.

[Guest]

Radio silence. If she hits you up proceed as normal. Otherwise just roll on.

The I've never bought a guy a drink before was a shit test, but you seemed to pass it fine. I'm wondering if she really did thing you were the musician and when she realized you weren't that's why she bolted...

[Guest]

It's hard to gauge her interest level from your post, but it seems that she was interested. She asked for your number and bought you a drink--those are strong IOI's if I ever saw one.

Now it may be a possibility that she got bored and lost interest, or she got a text from her friend and had to leave. Hard to say why she truly left.

But, she responded to your text that night when she could've easily ignored it.

I think there is some interest there, because of that, I would try to get her out before nexting her. I would send out a ping text to get a response, progress to text game an finish with telling her to meet you up.

Doing this will give you a better feeling of how interested she is.

No response - NEXT!
Brief texts and slow response time - she's just not that into you...NEXT!
Great convo but declines the invite - depends, but I'd prob try to get her out once more
she comes out - you try to close

[Guest]

What should the tone of this ping be? The details of our interaction are quickly fading from my memory.

[Guest]

I think the tone for any first message should be playful and fun, never too serious. One of my wings uses gambits one after the other to get these fuses to burn down.

[QUOTE]Wing: It was enchanting meeting you ;)

HB: you too:)
haha

Wing: don't be a stranger...i need some Vitamin K in my life ;);)

HB: haha smoooth
i wont

Wing: so what's new? catch me up on season 4 of Kirsty[/QUOTE]

That's a msg he sent me today , I think he's got a day 2 from that