My friend is a really good looking guy. He's also younger and has a great fashions sense.
My question is, do looks matter with women? What do you guys think?
Dallas PUA
The Pickup Artist Playground
Do Looks Matter?
9 posts
• Page 1 of 1
by Guest » Thu Feb 11, 2010 5:27 pm
For the sake of conversation because we all know this forum could use a few more active threads, I'll throw my 2 cents out there!
I'd have to say that as long as you are in the ball park as far as the looks department goes then you have got your foot in the door. For the rest you'll need to portray confidence and a little humor. A good smile goes a long way as well.
Males are definitely more stimulated by looks than females. Which leads me to believe that men put more value on looks than women do.
I'd have to say that as long as you are in the ball park as far as the looks department goes then you have got your foot in the door. For the rest you'll need to portray confidence and a little humor. A good smile goes a long way as well.
Males are definitely more stimulated by looks than females. Which leads me to believe that men put more value on looks than women do.
- Guest
by Guest » Thu Feb 11, 2010 6:01 pm
Yeah you need to do some reading. Here's a good place to start that evn talks about looks. This material really helped me out. I suggest you read everything in this website at least once. Its a fun read.
[url]http://ladderwiki.com/wiki/Original_Ladder_Theory[/url]
But to answer your question I'd say Good looks are not necessary but having Looks (IE style/class) is if you want to be successful with women. For example Chicks will always see what type of shoes you're wearing if they find you interesting.
If anything good looks matter more for guys then it does for girls. Hence why girls usually pay more attention to looking pretty then guys do.
Here's a chart
[IMG]http://www.laddertheory.com/images/1chart-mw.gif[/IMG]
[IMG]http://ladderwiki.com/w/images/7/7f/Attraction.jpg[/IMG]
[url]http://ladderwiki.com/wiki/Original_Ladder_Theory[/url]
But to answer your question I'd say Good looks are not necessary but having Looks (IE style/class) is if you want to be successful with women. For example Chicks will always see what type of shoes you're wearing if they find you interesting.
If anything good looks matter more for guys then it does for girls. Hence why girls usually pay more attention to looking pretty then guys do.
Here's a chart
[IMG]http://www.laddertheory.com/images/1chart-mw.gif[/IMG]
[IMG]http://ladderwiki.com/w/images/7/7f/Attraction.jpg[/IMG]
- Guest
by Guest » Fri Feb 12, 2010 12:14 pm
[SIZE=3][B]
[SIZE=2]This topic has been discussed ad nausem in the Community, but for the sake of an active forum, here are a few things that I had written about looks over the years.
They aren't fully vetted out, as most of my stuff tends to be, but I think you get the idea, even if they are concise...[/SIZE][/B][/SIZE][CENTER][CENTER][B][FONT="]
[/FONT][/B]
[B][FONT="]
[/FONT][/B]
[B][FONT="]Do Looks Matter?[/FONT][/B][/CENTER]
[/CENTER]
[FONT="]I have always contended that looks do matter. They aren't the ONLY thing that matters just like looks aren't the only thing that matters to us with respect to the women we pick.
I do agree that you can do a lot to improve your looks: dress, haircuts, clear skin, body language, straight/clean teeth, working out and dieting, etc.
Is it possible to be less attractive and to pick-up a more attractive woman? Absolutely, but the cards are stacked against you slightly. It will require more time and tighter game to pull her, but it can be done. It's not completely out of the question.
I'm an average looking guy, but I'm fucking awesome. That's how I think, that's what I believe. Still though, despite all of the value that I know I have a hold of (i.e. attractive personality traits and lifestyle) I'm still aware that I'm not going to be physically attractive to every women upon the approach. Sometimes I'm going to need a little time to really build attraction, I've learned to work around it because I know that I can close if given the time (or if I can create the platform from which to communicate my value).
Being attractive just gives you more room for error. Attractive guys can get away with stumbling or being sloppy in their game. A less attractive guy has to have it very, very tight. He has to execute and he can't screw up too much.
Looks aren't required, it's just an asset. Just like being witty or funny or creative or successful or intelligent are assets. All of the above matters, the only difference is that looks are the easiest thing to see. It's right in front of you. Right in your face.
The old adage "don't judge a book by its cover" exists for a reason. Because people do! We are visual creatures and we judge others based on what we can see. To say that looks aren't important is simply ridiculous and those that believe that are living in a fantasy world. There have been so many freaking studies that show that looks DO matter and DO have an impact on what other people think of you.[/FONT]
[FONT="]
[/FONT]
[CENTER][CENTER][B][FONT="]PUAs of the World: Quit Ugging it Up![/FONT][/B][/CENTER]
[/CENTER]
[FONT="]Looks aren't nearly as important for women as they are for men, but that doesn't mean that they don't matter.
I'm going to go off on a rant here but...
I get really tired of guys coming into the Community with this idea that they can sit on their ass all day, stuff their mouths with whatever they desire to eat, never work out, never worry about being stylish, never worry about hygiene, etc., etc., etc. and STILL be able to pull chicks. Think about it...does that make any sense to you? IT SHOULDN'T!!!
The premise of the Community is that even average guys can pick-up women, BUT only after they do a little bit of work to no longer be average. You can't simply read a couple of books, join a forum, go to a bootcamp, etc. and then walk up to women and have them creaming their panties for you. That's just not how this works. I think about how I used to be before the Community and how I am now and I realize that I've changed A LOT about myself. I'm more aware of how I look, how I walk, the words I use, the way I stand, the way I respond, facial expressions, etc., etc., etc., etc.
Sure, if you jump into this and never change anything about yourself besides what you say then I DO believe you will be more successful than you used to be. If that's what you're shooting for, then by all means go that route. I, like most guys on here, want so much more than just better than what we used to be. We want to be the best we possibly can.
So, back to the issue at hand...physical appearance.
Looks do matter. Type matters even more. I've had this conversation with countless women:
Me: "So, what was it about me that attracted you?"
The answers vary, but there's always one thing in common and it's ALMOST ALWAYS mentioned last:
"I thought you were cute" OR "you were my type."
Girls are just as shallow as guys, in some ways even more so. A lot of girls won't even give a guy a shot if he doesn't fit her 'type' of guy. Men on the other hand, we have types but we'll also go out of our types for women that we find to be beautiful. Me, I love slender, brunettes or thick, blondes...I guess I'm into contrasts...but does that mean I've never closed a slender, blonde or a red head? Hell no, if she's hot she's at least got a chance. I don't think women have this same level of flexibility.[/FONT]
[CENTER][CENTER][B][FONT="] More on Type…[/FONT][/B][/CENTER]
[/CENTER]
[I][COLOR=#0033cc][FONT="]elitetran54 wrote[/FONT][/COLOR][/I][COLOR=#0033cc][FONT="] ...
And secondly i know that physical appearance doesn't really matter when i comes to picking up girls.[/FONT][/COLOR]
[FONT="]
I honestly hate this misnomer in the community. Frankly, it's bullshit. My theory is that women have 'types.' They are generally attracted to the same type of guys, although they will be attracted to a wide variety of men based on their quality level.
The women that go for me tend to go for other guys that have similar physical attributes as me. Now, within the subset of guys that have similar physical attributes as I do women WILL compromise quality of looks as long as the guy still meets the general type criteria.
So if a girl likes a slender guy, blonde, tall, and wears glasses then she's typically going to date a guy that has those attributes. Now, she may date a 3 or a 10 within that subset as long as he meets those attributes.
The harsh reality is that a lot of women simply won't date a white guy, Asian, black, Hispanic, etc. They just won't. Some chicks will only date certain ethnicities.
Looks don't matter, type does. If you aren't someone's type, then you've got an uphill battle on your hands.[/FONT]
[SIZE=2]This topic has been discussed ad nausem in the Community, but for the sake of an active forum, here are a few things that I had written about looks over the years.
They aren't fully vetted out, as most of my stuff tends to be, but I think you get the idea, even if they are concise...[/SIZE][/B][/SIZE][CENTER][CENTER][B][FONT="]
[/FONT][/B]
[B][FONT="]
[/FONT][/B]
[B][FONT="]Do Looks Matter?[/FONT][/B][/CENTER]
[/CENTER]
[FONT="]I have always contended that looks do matter. They aren't the ONLY thing that matters just like looks aren't the only thing that matters to us with respect to the women we pick.
I do agree that you can do a lot to improve your looks: dress, haircuts, clear skin, body language, straight/clean teeth, working out and dieting, etc.
Is it possible to be less attractive and to pick-up a more attractive woman? Absolutely, but the cards are stacked against you slightly. It will require more time and tighter game to pull her, but it can be done. It's not completely out of the question.
I'm an average looking guy, but I'm fucking awesome. That's how I think, that's what I believe. Still though, despite all of the value that I know I have a hold of (i.e. attractive personality traits and lifestyle) I'm still aware that I'm not going to be physically attractive to every women upon the approach. Sometimes I'm going to need a little time to really build attraction, I've learned to work around it because I know that I can close if given the time (or if I can create the platform from which to communicate my value).
Being attractive just gives you more room for error. Attractive guys can get away with stumbling or being sloppy in their game. A less attractive guy has to have it very, very tight. He has to execute and he can't screw up too much.
Looks aren't required, it's just an asset. Just like being witty or funny or creative or successful or intelligent are assets. All of the above matters, the only difference is that looks are the easiest thing to see. It's right in front of you. Right in your face.
The old adage "don't judge a book by its cover" exists for a reason. Because people do! We are visual creatures and we judge others based on what we can see. To say that looks aren't important is simply ridiculous and those that believe that are living in a fantasy world. There have been so many freaking studies that show that looks DO matter and DO have an impact on what other people think of you.[/FONT]
[FONT="]
[/FONT]
[CENTER][CENTER][B][FONT="]PUAs of the World: Quit Ugging it Up![/FONT][/B][/CENTER]
[/CENTER]
[FONT="]Looks aren't nearly as important for women as they are for men, but that doesn't mean that they don't matter.
I'm going to go off on a rant here but...
I get really tired of guys coming into the Community with this idea that they can sit on their ass all day, stuff their mouths with whatever they desire to eat, never work out, never worry about being stylish, never worry about hygiene, etc., etc., etc. and STILL be able to pull chicks. Think about it...does that make any sense to you? IT SHOULDN'T!!!
The premise of the Community is that even average guys can pick-up women, BUT only after they do a little bit of work to no longer be average. You can't simply read a couple of books, join a forum, go to a bootcamp, etc. and then walk up to women and have them creaming their panties for you. That's just not how this works. I think about how I used to be before the Community and how I am now and I realize that I've changed A LOT about myself. I'm more aware of how I look, how I walk, the words I use, the way I stand, the way I respond, facial expressions, etc., etc., etc., etc.
Sure, if you jump into this and never change anything about yourself besides what you say then I DO believe you will be more successful than you used to be. If that's what you're shooting for, then by all means go that route. I, like most guys on here, want so much more than just better than what we used to be. We want to be the best we possibly can.
So, back to the issue at hand...physical appearance.
Looks do matter. Type matters even more. I've had this conversation with countless women:
Me: "So, what was it about me that attracted you?"
The answers vary, but there's always one thing in common and it's ALMOST ALWAYS mentioned last:
"I thought you were cute" OR "you were my type."
Girls are just as shallow as guys, in some ways even more so. A lot of girls won't even give a guy a shot if he doesn't fit her 'type' of guy. Men on the other hand, we have types but we'll also go out of our types for women that we find to be beautiful. Me, I love slender, brunettes or thick, blondes...I guess I'm into contrasts...but does that mean I've never closed a slender, blonde or a red head? Hell no, if she's hot she's at least got a chance. I don't think women have this same level of flexibility.[/FONT]
[CENTER][CENTER][B][FONT="] More on Type…[/FONT][/B][/CENTER]
[/CENTER]
[I][COLOR=#0033cc][FONT="]elitetran54 wrote[/FONT][/COLOR][/I][COLOR=#0033cc][FONT="] ...
And secondly i know that physical appearance doesn't really matter when i comes to picking up girls.[/FONT][/COLOR]
[FONT="]
I honestly hate this misnomer in the community. Frankly, it's bullshit. My theory is that women have 'types.' They are generally attracted to the same type of guys, although they will be attracted to a wide variety of men based on their quality level.
The women that go for me tend to go for other guys that have similar physical attributes as me. Now, within the subset of guys that have similar physical attributes as I do women WILL compromise quality of looks as long as the guy still meets the general type criteria.
So if a girl likes a slender guy, blonde, tall, and wears glasses then she's typically going to date a guy that has those attributes. Now, she may date a 3 or a 10 within that subset as long as he meets those attributes.
The harsh reality is that a lot of women simply won't date a white guy, Asian, black, Hispanic, etc. They just won't. Some chicks will only date certain ethnicities.
Looks don't matter, type does. If you aren't someone's type, then you've got an uphill battle on your hands.[/FONT]
- Guest
by Guest » Fri Feb 12, 2010 4:12 pm
[QUOTE=Smirks;34899]Before posting stuff like this, please try searching the forum. This topic has been beaten in to the ground for years.[/QUOTE]
I agree with Uncle Howie... This forum needs some discussion going on, beaten to death or not... but then again you're the moderator so moderate away! :D
I say looks don't matter, but help. If you are bad looking you damn well better have a banging ass personality to pick up the slack your looks is causing. If you are good looking, than you better have a banging ass personality to back up your looks :)
In other words, personality matters. Looks are a bonus. Stay clean though, noone wants to always be defending the fact that like look like shit.
I agree with Uncle Howie... This forum needs some discussion going on, beaten to death or not... but then again you're the moderator so moderate away! :D
I say looks don't matter, but help. If you are bad looking you damn well better have a banging ass personality to pick up the slack your looks is causing. If you are good looking, than you better have a banging ass personality to back up your looks :)
In other words, personality matters. Looks are a bonus. Stay clean though, noone wants to always be defending the fact that like look like shit.
- Guest
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