[QUOTE=UncleHOwie;39241]Sizzle......the reason you won't get older women is because they are tired of guys like you. Guys like you left a bad taste in their mouth. What is Uncle Howie talking about you ask? I'm talking about the type of guy who has a LTR of 4 years at home and wants to bang girls on the side. I'm talking about the type who will string girls a long feeding them full of their shit.
[B]
Principles my ass......... I was skeptical of you from the very first post you ever made. You blow a lot of smoke. I bet you live with her because you can't afford to make it on your own nor are you willing to take that chance[/B]! ;)[/QUOTE]
I see what you did there and I'm not going to bite. Trying to keep this strictly constructive so I can better myself and my game, not trying to go personal.
The only thing I can draw from that, and I have already said it, I know I'm living wrong but it is a choice I am going to continue to make for now. I understand the several reasons why it is a bad choice, but my decision is to do both.
I understand what you are saying though, older women have a keener sense and may get an "off" vibe from me, but I think that in its self a self-limiting belief, which I try not to let live in my universe. I've seen younger guys pull older women, and I'm trying to figure out how to not let the conversation fizzle off at the point, or have the HB "write me off" due to age.
Dallas PUA
The Pickup Artist Playground
My personal sticking points
18 posts
• Page 2 of 2 • 1, 2
by Guest » Mon Jan 10, 2011 2:38 pm
[QUOTE]The only thing I can draw from that, and I have already said it, I know I'm living wrong but it is a choice I am going to continue to make for now. I understand the several reasons why it is a bad choice, but my decision is to do both.[/QUOTE]
I'm going to go on a bit of a rant here..
Dude, I know your young, and maybe you just aren't there emotionally, spiritually, or whatever, but the sooner you learn that [B]you can't move ahead by doing the unethical thing[/b], the better off you will be. You'll be better off in all the ways that make you more attractive to women. My opinion is that if you don't understand and embrace this, then you don't get what the community and the game are really about. Your not ready for it. I would just as soon have you banned from the forum, because in limiting the knowledge you gain from the men here, we may spare some woman the abuse she would otherwise suffer at your hands.. The first rule of pickup is to leave women better than you found them. If you can't respect that then your pissing in the communal swimming pool that is the dating scene, and some guy is going to have to deal with the women you leave in your wake.
/rant off, and to talk about what you about where your at right now...
To quote a favorite book of mine, "As a Man Thinketh", by James Allen, "Action is the blossom of thought, and joy or suffering are it's fruits; thus does a man garner in the sweet and bitter fruitage of his own husbandry."
Just in case you can't decipher that, it means that all action comes from your thoughts both conscious and unconscious. You experience joy or suffering as a direct result of your own actions, and that joy or suffering is your own damned fault. You know your doing something unethical, and your problems (suffering) will continue until you fix this.
I'm going to go on a bit of a rant here..
Dude, I know your young, and maybe you just aren't there emotionally, spiritually, or whatever, but the sooner you learn that [B]you can't move ahead by doing the unethical thing[/b], the better off you will be. You'll be better off in all the ways that make you more attractive to women. My opinion is that if you don't understand and embrace this, then you don't get what the community and the game are really about. Your not ready for it. I would just as soon have you banned from the forum, because in limiting the knowledge you gain from the men here, we may spare some woman the abuse she would otherwise suffer at your hands.. The first rule of pickup is to leave women better than you found them. If you can't respect that then your pissing in the communal swimming pool that is the dating scene, and some guy is going to have to deal with the women you leave in your wake.
/rant off, and to talk about what you about where your at right now...
To quote a favorite book of mine, "As a Man Thinketh", by James Allen, "Action is the blossom of thought, and joy or suffering are it's fruits; thus does a man garner in the sweet and bitter fruitage of his own husbandry."
Just in case you can't decipher that, it means that all action comes from your thoughts both conscious and unconscious. You experience joy or suffering as a direct result of your own actions, and that joy or suffering is your own damned fault. You know your doing something unethical, and your problems (suffering) will continue until you fix this.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Jan 10, 2011 3:17 pm
[QUOTE=traxxus;39274]I'm going to go on a bit of a rant here..
Dude, I know your young, and maybe you just aren't there emotionally, spiritually, or whatever, but the sooner you learn that [B]you can't move ahead by doing the unethical thing[/B], the better off you will be. You'll be better off in all the ways that make you more attractive to women. My opinion is that if you don't understand and embrace this, then you don't get what the community and the game are really about. Your not ready for it. I would just as soon have you banned from the forum, because in limiting the knowledge you gain from the men here, we may spare some woman the abuse she would otherwise suffer at your hands.. The first rule of pickup is to leave women better than you found them. If you can't respect that then your pissing in the communal swimming pool that is the dating scene, and some guy is going to have to deal with the women you leave in your wake.
/rant off, and to talk about what you about where your at right now...
To quote a favorite book of mine, "As a Man Thinketh", by James Allen, "Action is the blossom of thought, and joy or suffering are it's fruits; thus does a man garner in the sweet and bitter fruitage of his own husbandry."
Just in case you can't decipher that, it means that all action comes from your thoughts both conscious and unconscious. You experience joy or suffering as a direct result of your own actions, and that joy or suffering is your own damned fault. You know your doing something unethical, and your problems (suffering) will continue until you fix this.[/QUOTE]
There's a lot of truth to this Trax. But, first off, understand that the idea that you leave a girl better than you found them is virtually impossible. It's one of the most beta things I've heard in the Community. Personally, I think this is nothing more than justification for the guilt one might feel from decieving a girl with Game, pumping and dumping, or leading a girl on to think that your relationship is more than it truely is.
I've been in the Community for a long, long time. I'm proud to have many conquests. And, I can honestly say that very, very few of them were left better off than I found them. At best, they were left the same. At the worst, they're very hostile towards me.
Do not concern yourself too much with how you are leaving a woman. Yes, you need to be responsible with your newly found skills. But, even if you are upfront and honest with a woman from day one, chances are that she'll never actually listen to you. She'll believe what she wants and she'll end up being hurt, even if you didn't really do anything wrong.
I, personally, don't think that Sizzle should keep is LTR around if he wants to live the 'lifestyle.' But, this is his choice and he needs to make it for himself. Does this mean he's at risk of leaving his LTR worse off than he found her? Sure, but that's ultimately up to her to decide.
Dude, I know your young, and maybe you just aren't there emotionally, spiritually, or whatever, but the sooner you learn that [B]you can't move ahead by doing the unethical thing[/B], the better off you will be. You'll be better off in all the ways that make you more attractive to women. My opinion is that if you don't understand and embrace this, then you don't get what the community and the game are really about. Your not ready for it. I would just as soon have you banned from the forum, because in limiting the knowledge you gain from the men here, we may spare some woman the abuse she would otherwise suffer at your hands.. The first rule of pickup is to leave women better than you found them. If you can't respect that then your pissing in the communal swimming pool that is the dating scene, and some guy is going to have to deal with the women you leave in your wake.
/rant off, and to talk about what you about where your at right now...
To quote a favorite book of mine, "As a Man Thinketh", by James Allen, "Action is the blossom of thought, and joy or suffering are it's fruits; thus does a man garner in the sweet and bitter fruitage of his own husbandry."
Just in case you can't decipher that, it means that all action comes from your thoughts both conscious and unconscious. You experience joy or suffering as a direct result of your own actions, and that joy or suffering is your own damned fault. You know your doing something unethical, and your problems (suffering) will continue until you fix this.[/QUOTE]
There's a lot of truth to this Trax. But, first off, understand that the idea that you leave a girl better than you found them is virtually impossible. It's one of the most beta things I've heard in the Community. Personally, I think this is nothing more than justification for the guilt one might feel from decieving a girl with Game, pumping and dumping, or leading a girl on to think that your relationship is more than it truely is.
I've been in the Community for a long, long time. I'm proud to have many conquests. And, I can honestly say that very, very few of them were left better off than I found them. At best, they were left the same. At the worst, they're very hostile towards me.
Do not concern yourself too much with how you are leaving a woman. Yes, you need to be responsible with your newly found skills. But, even if you are upfront and honest with a woman from day one, chances are that she'll never actually listen to you. She'll believe what she wants and she'll end up being hurt, even if you didn't really do anything wrong.
I, personally, don't think that Sizzle should keep is LTR around if he wants to live the 'lifestyle.' But, this is his choice and he needs to make it for himself. Does this mean he's at risk of leaving his LTR worse off than he found her? Sure, but that's ultimately up to her to decide.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Jan 10, 2011 3:32 pm
[QUOTE=Sizzle;39272]I understand what you are saying though, older women have a keener sense and may get an "off" vibe from me, but I think that in its self a self-limiting belief, which I try not to let live in my universe. I've seen younger guys pull older women, and I'm trying to figure out how to not let the conversation fizzle off at the point, or have the HB "write me off" due to age.[/QUOTE]
You missed his point. What he's saying is that perhaps women don't write you off due to your age; maybe they write you off due to your lack of integrity, which they are keen to sense.
On the other hand, there are plenty of older women with low self esteem who believe they deserve to be treated like shit. Thing is you don't need much game to take one of them home. Low hanging fruit. Have at it.
You missed his point. What he's saying is that perhaps women don't write you off due to your age; maybe they write you off due to your lack of integrity, which they are keen to sense.
On the other hand, there are plenty of older women with low self esteem who believe they deserve to be treated like shit. Thing is you don't need much game to take one of them home. Low hanging fruit. Have at it.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Jan 10, 2011 3:48 pm
[QUOTE=Bull Run;39276]Do not concern yourself too much with how you are leaving a woman. Yes, you need to be responsible with your newly found skills. But, even if you are upfront and honest with a woman from day one, chances are that she'll never actually listen to you. She'll believe what she wants and she'll end up being hurt, even if you didn't really do anything wrong.[/QUOTE]
Personally, I believe I should [B]try[/B] to leave [B]all people[/B] better off than when I found them. I may not always be successful, but I do care how I leave a woman.
Also, just because a woman acts hurt when you leave her, that doesn't necessarily mean she's not better off. That could be her way of coping with losing you. It's a cleaner break. Closure. It's not her fault. Once she convinces herself of all that, she may still be left with exciting memories and lessons learned, not to mention sexual satisfaction and higher self esteem. Or maybe not. Like you said, it's ultimately up to her.
Personally, I believe I should [B]try[/B] to leave [B]all people[/B] better off than when I found them. I may not always be successful, but I do care how I leave a woman.
Also, just because a woman acts hurt when you leave her, that doesn't necessarily mean she's not better off. That could be her way of coping with losing you. It's a cleaner break. Closure. It's not her fault. Once she convinces herself of all that, she may still be left with exciting memories and lessons learned, not to mention sexual satisfaction and higher self esteem. Or maybe not. Like you said, it's ultimately up to her.
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Jan 10, 2011 4:23 pm
First off, I will not comment on the ethics of being in an LTR and wanting to life the PUA lifestyle. It is not my place to tell you what is right and wrong. Ultimately, it’s your life and you should live it however you wish.
Age. Most girls are accustomed to dating older men, and so they may be a little apprehensive when they discover that you’re younger than them. Chances are that they probably haven’t dated someone younger than them. Having said that, if they find you attractive (meaning, you have tight game and have demonstrated high value), then I do not see age as a problem (within reason of course, +/- 3 years).
It really comes down to a girl’s stage in life. If she’s a cougar, she may be looking for a younger man. But, if she is looking to settle down (generally late twenties to early thirties), she may have the perception that since you’re 23, you’re not ready to settle down. So it’s not your age, but rather her perception of your maturity or ability to commit to something long-term.
I can’t offer you much advice in this area, simply because I don’t have the experience in dealing with the issue. But, I advise that you continue to plow (you may use it as a disqualifier, neg her, etc). If your game is tight enough, they will eventually overlook the age difference because you have so many other positive qualities that they find attractive.
Frame / life. As you said, you have no problems generating attraction; it’s your latter game that is preventing you from pulling. It’s difficult to say what the problem is because we do not have full visibility of all your interactions and texts.
My suggestion is that you write field reports. FRs force you to replay each interaction in your head, which allows you the opportunity to analyze each interaction. If you go out, do not get drunk. Drink enough to feel loose, but still have the capability to remember what was said and the girl’s reaction(s). When you write your field reports, be as detailed as possible. Hopefully, when you sit down to write the FRs, you’ll be able to identify what you did wrong. Did you fail a shit test? Was it something you said? Something you did? Did you come off too needy? Etc. Identifying your problems is the first step to finding a solution. If you were able to identify what went wrong, you will be able to find ways to prevent them in the future.
Now, for a Prodigy sidenote commentary.
I have met you and sarged with you and will say that you have the potential to be a great PUA. However, to be great, you have to fully dedicate yourself to the lifestyle (of a player). That means going out and approaching women 3-4 nights a week. Constantly studying game to find out what works. You will need to have a place to bring girls to. You need time to take girls on day 2’s. etc, etc, etc. But most importantly, you must be detached from emotion. You must have little to no conscience, be heartless (as you will be breaking girls’ hearts and hurting girls’ feelings). That’s the only way you can date and sleep with multiple women without feeling like shit (unless they’re ok with it, but let’s be honest, most women are never really “ok” with it). Most guys can’t do that—it’s hard to knowingly hurt a girl...trust me, I know from experience.
Living the lifestyle is not all glitz and glamour; it’s not all fun and games. It’s a hard life to live and it eventually takes a toll on you. It’s not easy. It only makes more difficult when you are in a LTR.
I have a feeling that you’re not ready to fully dedicate yourself to the lifestyle. I think that you care deeply for your LTR, and because of that, you subconsciously sabotage your sets, because you’re afraid of success. You’re afraid that if you’re successful, you’ll hurt her...that is simply my opinion, which may or may not be right...If I’m wrong, then you need to identify where it is that the interaction goes wrong, study game, and then take the necessary steps to improve it.
Til next time, good gaming!
Age. Most girls are accustomed to dating older men, and so they may be a little apprehensive when they discover that you’re younger than them. Chances are that they probably haven’t dated someone younger than them. Having said that, if they find you attractive (meaning, you have tight game and have demonstrated high value), then I do not see age as a problem (within reason of course, +/- 3 years).
It really comes down to a girl’s stage in life. If she’s a cougar, she may be looking for a younger man. But, if she is looking to settle down (generally late twenties to early thirties), she may have the perception that since you’re 23, you’re not ready to settle down. So it’s not your age, but rather her perception of your maturity or ability to commit to something long-term.
I can’t offer you much advice in this area, simply because I don’t have the experience in dealing with the issue. But, I advise that you continue to plow (you may use it as a disqualifier, neg her, etc). If your game is tight enough, they will eventually overlook the age difference because you have so many other positive qualities that they find attractive.
Frame / life. As you said, you have no problems generating attraction; it’s your latter game that is preventing you from pulling. It’s difficult to say what the problem is because we do not have full visibility of all your interactions and texts.
My suggestion is that you write field reports. FRs force you to replay each interaction in your head, which allows you the opportunity to analyze each interaction. If you go out, do not get drunk. Drink enough to feel loose, but still have the capability to remember what was said and the girl’s reaction(s). When you write your field reports, be as detailed as possible. Hopefully, when you sit down to write the FRs, you’ll be able to identify what you did wrong. Did you fail a shit test? Was it something you said? Something you did? Did you come off too needy? Etc. Identifying your problems is the first step to finding a solution. If you were able to identify what went wrong, you will be able to find ways to prevent them in the future.
Now, for a Prodigy sidenote commentary.
I have met you and sarged with you and will say that you have the potential to be a great PUA. However, to be great, you have to fully dedicate yourself to the lifestyle (of a player). That means going out and approaching women 3-4 nights a week. Constantly studying game to find out what works. You will need to have a place to bring girls to. You need time to take girls on day 2’s. etc, etc, etc. But most importantly, you must be detached from emotion. You must have little to no conscience, be heartless (as you will be breaking girls’ hearts and hurting girls’ feelings). That’s the only way you can date and sleep with multiple women without feeling like shit (unless they’re ok with it, but let’s be honest, most women are never really “ok” with it). Most guys can’t do that—it’s hard to knowingly hurt a girl...trust me, I know from experience.
Living the lifestyle is not all glitz and glamour; it’s not all fun and games. It’s a hard life to live and it eventually takes a toll on you. It’s not easy. It only makes more difficult when you are in a LTR.
I have a feeling that you’re not ready to fully dedicate yourself to the lifestyle. I think that you care deeply for your LTR, and because of that, you subconsciously sabotage your sets, because you’re afraid of success. You’re afraid that if you’re successful, you’ll hurt her...that is simply my opinion, which may or may not be right...If I’m wrong, then you need to identify where it is that the interaction goes wrong, study game, and then take the necessary steps to improve it.
Til next time, good gaming!
- Guest
by Guest » Mon Jan 10, 2011 4:24 pm
[QUOTE=traxxus;39274]
Dude, I know your young, and maybe you just aren't there emotionally, spiritually, or whatever, but the sooner you learn that [B]you can't move ahead by doing the unethical thing[/b], QUOTE]
I 100% agree with that statement, and hold your (and everybody else's) opinion to respect . However, as far as myself personally, the decision to do both (for now) is mine and I ask that you respect that just the same, even if you do not agree with it. I know it's wrong, unethical, and all of the above. I know I'm asking for help, but it is still my decision.
Let me give you a little bit more insight to my thoughts and observations:
1) The women out there: The women that I meet out in bars, clubs, etc may be hot, but I lack a connection with them (especially with using game) and I'm sure many of you feel that as well.
2) I've been with my LTR for 4 years, not going to replace her just like that. I also like her company and the connection we have, however something is just missing there and I hope we can get back to that. This is my 1st and only "official" g/f, and the only girl I've loved. She tries everything she can to make our relationship work...
holy shit I think I just had a realization mid-sentence. Am I the HB and is my girl AFC/Beta? I mean, until she puts up a challenge thats when I want her? Right now she gives herself 100% to me and maybe I am just acting like a HB and not wanting it, looking for a challenge? Just random thoughts but it seemed like something worth noting.
Good discussion so far guys!
PS - Never the long hanging fruit guys!
Dude, I know your young, and maybe you just aren't there emotionally, spiritually, or whatever, but the sooner you learn that [B]you can't move ahead by doing the unethical thing[/b], QUOTE]
I 100% agree with that statement, and hold your (and everybody else's) opinion to respect . However, as far as myself personally, the decision to do both (for now) is mine and I ask that you respect that just the same, even if you do not agree with it. I know it's wrong, unethical, and all of the above. I know I'm asking for help, but it is still my decision.
Let me give you a little bit more insight to my thoughts and observations:
1) The women out there: The women that I meet out in bars, clubs, etc may be hot, but I lack a connection with them (especially with using game) and I'm sure many of you feel that as well.
2) I've been with my LTR for 4 years, not going to replace her just like that. I also like her company and the connection we have, however something is just missing there and I hope we can get back to that. This is my 1st and only "official" g/f, and the only girl I've loved. She tries everything she can to make our relationship work...
holy shit I think I just had a realization mid-sentence. Am I the HB and is my girl AFC/Beta? I mean, until she puts up a challenge thats when I want her? Right now she gives herself 100% to me and maybe I am just acting like a HB and not wanting it, looking for a challenge? Just random thoughts but it seemed like something worth noting.
Good discussion so far guys!
PS - Never the long hanging fruit guys!
- Guest
by Guest » Tue Jan 11, 2011 12:00 pm
[QUOTE=Sizzle;39283]holy shit I think I just had a realization mid-sentence. Am I the HB and is my girl AFC/Beta? I mean, until she puts up a challenge thats when I want her? Right now she gives herself 100% to me and maybe I am just acting like a HB and not wanting it, looking for a challenge? Just random thoughts but it seemed like something worth noting.
Good discussion so far guys!
PS - Never the long hanging fruit guys![/QUOTE]
Bro it's the way attraction works. The pendulum always swings and the pursued always becomes the pursuer. You want something until you have it then you don't. Men and women are similar in this aspect. The key is to understand yourself and whether you actually want something or if you just want to chase something. You seem to be having a few lightbulb moments so I'm pretty sure you will be fine in this aspect.
All moral judgements aside your situation is limiting your progress and your results. Period. If what you really want is to be good at our craft and truely experience this "lifestyle" lose the broad. You are right it is your choice. We are all just telling you from our experience what would give you the best results. We are also letting you know that in making that choice to keep her around you are deluding yourself and don't really have the drive and desire you claim to have. I personnally don't care about your ethics, integrety etc. Just why guys on here have been quick to judge.
I personnally agree with Bull Run's stance on the ethics of this. A hurricane doesn't have a conscience. I think the leave them better than you find them thing is a very lofty goal. Most of us got into this because we weren't happy with some aspect of our life. A lot of us got into this because we were doing things that made other people(women) happy over what made us happy thinking that this integrety is ultimately what made us worthy of their affection. Choosing to treat women like they are somewhat or completely disposable as way to demonstrate your value and make them chase you isn't something you should justify by the fact that they had good time having atraction and comfort material ran on them. When their interest and yours are pulling you in different directions you gotta go with yours, every time and not feel bad about it.
Good discussion so far guys!
PS - Never the long hanging fruit guys![/QUOTE]
Bro it's the way attraction works. The pendulum always swings and the pursued always becomes the pursuer. You want something until you have it then you don't. Men and women are similar in this aspect. The key is to understand yourself and whether you actually want something or if you just want to chase something. You seem to be having a few lightbulb moments so I'm pretty sure you will be fine in this aspect.
All moral judgements aside your situation is limiting your progress and your results. Period. If what you really want is to be good at our craft and truely experience this "lifestyle" lose the broad. You are right it is your choice. We are all just telling you from our experience what would give you the best results. We are also letting you know that in making that choice to keep her around you are deluding yourself and don't really have the drive and desire you claim to have. I personnally don't care about your ethics, integrety etc. Just why guys on here have been quick to judge.
I personnally agree with Bull Run's stance on the ethics of this. A hurricane doesn't have a conscience. I think the leave them better than you find them thing is a very lofty goal. Most of us got into this because we weren't happy with some aspect of our life. A lot of us got into this because we were doing things that made other people(women) happy over what made us happy thinking that this integrety is ultimately what made us worthy of their affection. Choosing to treat women like they are somewhat or completely disposable as way to demonstrate your value and make them chase you isn't something you should justify by the fact that they had good time having atraction and comfort material ran on them. When their interest and yours are pulling you in different directions you gotta go with yours, every time and not feel bad about it.
- Guest
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