My friends take my seconds

[Guest]

I agree with what solace said.
In high school, friemds are so easily replaced it almost makes them disposable.

If this friend of yours who likes to get your sloppy seconds is a really good long term friend then since you already talked to him it is time to give him a warning.
Go a week without interacting with him.
If he really values your friendship as much as you do then he will come to you and ask what's up.
Then you can tell him the situation and tell him that he is important to you as a friend and that if he doesn't stop taking your seconds then you are going to find a new friend to replace him.

[Guest]

I think that you should just get a new set of friends. It is easier to do that than to try to change a social dynamics that has been established with your old friends. That or just get comfortable with your friend dating girls that you nailed and broke up with.

[Guest]

People are not re-creatable.

We're all unique, we're all special, we are all special.

However, the ROLES that people play in your life can be filled by others.

Saying goodbye to a friend is sad, finding a new, geniune friend is hard. Keep that in mind. People are not OBJECTS, not even close.

[Guest]

wow, there is a certain tone in a few of the posts that really bothers me. Guess I'm kind of old school and friendships matter to me. I wasn't brought up in the "throw-away" society where if you didn't like something you just went and got new. I see a lot of people these days that are lacking "depth" as a result.

[Guest]

I was that guy in highschool and college, now I'm more respectable. Not only do your friends need to become men, but the women are shameful. What trash.

[Guest]

This was a HUGE problem for me, and there's only one way that I solved it. Basically I got new firends, which is what everyone else in this thread seems to be suggesting. But let me expand on that a little. Getting new friends doesn't mean getting rid of the old ones. Start expanding your social circle. Hell, have more than one social circle that you'll be able to jump in and out of. One group of friends can be a break from another. Don't mix them, at least don't mix them unless you think you can get something of value with it.

Right now when you introduce strangers into your old circle of friends it doesn't seem to benifit you at all. Don't game girls around your old friends, and don't introduce them to the girls you are dating. If these guys are cool to hang around with because you can play video games and relax with them, why are you even bringing dates to their parties? I suggest you get other groups of more mature friends (men AND women) who you can introduce dates to.

It's not easy. It took me probably two years to accomplish this. You might piss off some old friends,or they might make you feel guilty that you don't hang out with them as much anymore, but that's fine. Leave them out of the loop. Don't feel bad doing things that are going to better you as a person.

[Guest]

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