Several years back

[MagicBalls]

There is something that happened to me several years back which once in a while pops in my memory and bugs me.

There was this friend I had, let's just say her name was Michelle. She was beautiful, and from a good and well-off family. I met her through my sister. She was my sister's age, which is a few years younger than I. I knew her from many years, and we hung out together in a group of friends. As a group we would go cruising together, party together, and dance to Nine Inch Nails when the mood arose.

After a few years of knowing her, I moved to the dorms at another town, and lived there for about two years. When I went back home, we hung out more, but this time my sister was living in another city, so it was less of, "I'm here with my sis" type of thing. It was more personal.

She always gave me eyes or flirted with me. One time she went inside the bathroom to get something when I was inside and brushed up against me and smiled at me. For someone that I had known and liked for so long, the sexual tension in that moment was pretty high. There were many moments like these.

In one instance, we sat close together in a big chair meant for one person, and we gave each other power hits. That was the first time ever for me doing something like that, and it was pretty intense.

I don't do drugs anymore, by the way, in case you all are wondering. I actually live a very healthy lifestyle now.

In any case, why I never did anything, I don't know. I wanted to. I think one of the reasons is that she had a boyfriend. He was the father of her 3 year old daughter, who was the cutest, sweetest thing in the world. What's worse, is that he was the leader of a gang.

On the one hand, I didn't know exactly how to make my move. On the other hand, perhaps I felt like I didn't deserve it. And last but not least, I felt like I was infringing on someone else's territory.

One time Michelle and I went to a club together. This time my sister was in town, and we invited her, but she did not go. So we walked around, danced, hung out. There was a lot of kino when we talked to each other inside the club. At this point she had broken up with her boyfriend. He must of heard we were there together, because he showed up. She asked me to take her home.

This is the painful part. So as we are making our way to the car, he stops her. He starts yelling at her, saying things like, "so are you going to go fuck him now?" Then he asks for his ring back. She won't give it to him. Michelle tells me to get inside the car, and not to interfere. I get inside the car. I'm sitting there, feeling very helpless. Then I hear some knocks on the car. He is beating the shit out of her. I don't do anything. It is not fighting that I"m afraid of. I'm afraid he will come after me or my family.

He finally takes the ring from her. She gets in the car, and we drive off. The next day Michelle and I look at my car. It's got blood on it. She apologizes. I told her I was just glad she is ok.

I still regret not standing up for her. I am ashamed of it. She told me to stay out of it. But I think a part of her did want me to defend her. After this incident, it was never the same between us.

I think I must have had a real low sense of self worth, and believed that perhaps I did not deserve her. Thursday I was getting a girls number. I had only met her once. Then her ex gets there. I pause. I know it is her ex. I feel like I am infringing. Then she gives him this look like, "hey look at me, I'm in demand," as she held her phone to program my number into it. That gave me courage to start talking real loud about possible future dates.

So I no longer turn away at the site of competition. But there is still, somewhere in my subconscious, a thought that I shouldn't be gaming a girl the moment another guy is in the vicinity. I have to remind myself that I am worth it.

[zine]

Maybe you didn't react the way you should have back then, but you obviously weren't at the place you were back then that you are right now. To regret the past is wasting your energy away that could be focused on making the present even better. You learned from what happened.

I know an excersize that will help you. What I want you to do is to fully feel what it was like to watch her get beat like that, how you felt, what you saw, what you heard then
Ask yourself these questions:

Can I let this go?
Will I let this go?
When?

the answers don't matter so much. Just keep asking the questions.
if that doesn't help pm me. I love helping people grow and get over their limiting beliefs.

[Tribulus1000]

Can I let this go?
Will I let this go?
When?

the answers don't matter so much. Just keep asking the questions.
if that doesn't help pm me. I love helping people grow and get over their limiting beliefs.

Sedona Method. Awesome. Glad to hear someone else is on it.

Read Sedona Method by Hale Dwoskin. A friend of mine did the Releasing Technique Bootcamp in NYC.

[zine]

yep I use on occasion when something is really screwing with me. Pretty easy to teach and effective.

[Tribulus1000]

yep I use on occasion when something is really screwing with me. Pretty easy to teach and effective.

Damn straight. Probably the better than NLP. Love it.

[Skaldgrimnir]

yep I use on occasion when something is really screwing with me. Pretty easy to teach and effective.

I am interested in your newsletter. How would one subscribe?

[zine]

heh I'll throw one on my website if you really interested lol. All I showed was just simple sedona method stuff. I would be interested in getting together a group of us that specializes in reframing and conquering limiting beliefs.

[Skaldgrimnir]

That would be something I'd have serious interest in.

[Westfall]

Personally, I like the idea of not having beliefs...or at least not in the sense most people have "beliefs"

"People have slaughtered each other in wars, inquisitions, and political actions for centuries and still kill each other over beliefs in religions, political ideologies, and philosophies. These belief-systems, when stated as propositions, may appear mystical, and genuine to the naive, but when confronted with a testable bases from reason and experiment, they fail miserably. I maintain that beliefs create more social problems than they solve and that beliefs, and especially those elevated to faith, produce the most destructive potential to the future of humankind."

http://www.nobeliefs.com/beliefs.htm

[Skaldgrimnir]

Personally, I like the idea of not having beliefs...or at least not in the sense most people have "beliefs"

"People have slaughtered each other in wars, inquisitions, and political actions for centuries and still kill each other over beliefs in religions, political ideologies, and philosophies. These belief-systems, when stated as propositions, may appear mystical, and genuine to the naive, but when confronted with a testable bases from reason and experiment, they fail miserably. I maintain that beliefs create more social problems than they solve and that beliefs, and especially those elevated to faith, produce the most destructive potential to the future of humankind."

http://www.nobeliefs.com/beliefs.htm

See, I believe that belief is necessary for achievement, more so than any idea. It is belief, in himself or in his dream, that allows a man to drive himself from the poorhouse to being a confident, capable businessman.

It is belief, more than mere ideas, that drive us to be better than who we are now, or were yesterday.