AFC Friends

[Guest]

Do you interfere in the love lives of your AFC friends? There was another thread about what it means to be a man, and one of the points was to let other men try and fail. But if you see your friends being totally AFC, do you interfere?

I was hanging with one of my friends last night. He was telling me about these two girls he's dating (I suspect he hasn't slept with either one of them). He has spent every night the past week with one of them, girl1. He even blew me off one night for her. He's making himself way too available for her. They're "talking about being boyfriend and girlfriend."

The second one, girl2, wanted to make plans with him but he was already doing something, but his plans fell through and he wanted to see her. Without going into details, he tells me that he was apologetic with her and even made up a lie to appease her.

Then, girl1 texts him, because she was out with her girlfriends and he texted her to check in with her (needy). She said that she was really drunk, and he was ready to go wherever she was to drive her home.

It was killing me! There was such horrible AFC behavior. I tried to communicate the right way to behave without directly criticizing his behavior. He is clearly a super nice guy. On one hand, I know I should let him try, fail, and learn. On the other hand, I wish someone had told me to stop being such a needy AFC when I was his age.

[Guest]

You cannot tell an AFC that they are an AFC, they have to come to that realization themselves. Unfortunately, it's usually after they get hurt HARD CORE. Still though, it's a personal decision and a personal journey. Let them make it on their own.

I've tried to 'show the light' to my AFC friends and guess what? They're still AFC's but they're no longer my friend. It's sad but true. I destroyed some friendships in the name of trying to make them into someone they were not and would NEVER become unless they did so themselves.

[Guest]

Let him be.

The guy has two girls on Hook. How AFC is he? Maybe he is actually Alpha.

An Alpha can actually be AFC(beta) if he so chooses and get away with it.