Horrible Advice on Dating From the Internet

[Guest]

Hey everyone,

I was going to check my Yahoo email just now and I saw an article titled "Five Signs of a Great Date." Of course I had to read it because I have found that mainstream articles that offer dating advice are usually horrible and actually tell you to do things that prevent you from getting laid. It contains both a male and female perspective and while both are bad, the female perspective is especially terrible. Each gender is giving advice to their own gender but I always used to ask girls advice and it was almost always bad advice. It is no wonder people need things like the community to get laid. I pasted it below with my comments.

[color=#FF00BF]SHE SAYS:[/color]
1: You're actually excited to go out with him. And he seems excited to be going out with you, too. If you feel more excitement about going to the dentist than going on the date, you should have said "no" in the first place. Your lack of enthusiasm is likely to smother any chances you will hit it off, so either cancel the date or convince yourself to be open-minded. If he greets you with a smile and is on time, you are off to a good start. [color=#0000FF][i](Wow groundbreaking stuff here! Of course this is still assuming that the guy is staying in the bf frame and picking her up at her house--probably with a rose and his testicles cut off!)[/i][/color]

2: He spent time planning the date. Did he think beyond just asking you out and make a reservation somewhere? Is he taking you to a meal or just a "meet for drinks after work" trial run? Did he print out directions and consider parking or is he obviously winging it? If you see that he has made some effort to make sure the night goes smoothly, or if he's visibly nervous about impressing you, then the guy actually thinks there's potential -- his intentions, however, remain to be seen. [color=#0000FF][i](Okay, I think girls like spontaneity. Winging it is usually a good thing. If a guy showed up to a date with a girl with fucking Mapquest directions and an agenda that would be terrible. Also, she suggests to look if the guy is nervous as a good sign. This is a perfect example of how girls don't know what they want. Almost every girl wants the guy who is smooth not the nervous nelly. It would be a massive turn off for a girl to be on a date with a guy that is so nervous that it is visually apparent)[/i][/color]

3: He picks up the bill.
Call me old-fashioned, but if he asked you out, he should reach for the check. If he doesn't, then either he's lost interest in you or he's just cheap. That said, don't order the most expensive drink in the house to go with your lobster. Be considerate. And speaking of top-shelf martini's, if it's clear to you that the only way to get through your date is to consume as many drinks as the waiter will bring, you might as well cut your losses, fake a headache, and go home where you can watch re-runs of "Sex in the City." The same is true if he starts throwing back the drinks faster than you. [color=#0000FF][i](This point is not bad. I think the old community dogma of not picking up checks has gotten guys in more trouble than anything else. Of course you can still get girls to buy you things and shouldn't use money to impress but picking up a drink tab on the first date is not a big deal.)[/i][/color]

4: He maintains eye contact throughout the night. If you notice he's squinting to see the backside of a scantily clad waitress, wait for the guy who actually makes an effort to focus on you. Your eye contact should coincide with a nice ebb and flow of conversation, not just him or you doing all the talking. And the date is doomed if he calls you by the wrong name or forgets your name entirely. [color=#0000FF][i](Again fairly common sense. This is probably her best point. I use eye contact to an extreme degree and it builds sexual tension and shows confidence. I'm sure this was not her point but it is true. Also, she makes it seem like if you get caught checking out another girl or forget her name that the date is over. I think that if your frame is strong enough you can play this off.)[/i][/color]

5: You both can't wait to talk to each other again -- and I stress actually talk, not send emails or text messages. And ladies, the only way he's going to call you the next day to tell you how much fun he had on the date, is if you go to separate homes when the date ends. A great first date always leaves something to the imagination... [color=#0000FF][i](WOW! Worst advice possible! Call her the next day to tell her how much fun you had!?!? That is fucking needy as shit and will almost guarantee you don't get another date--unless you are saying it casually in the context of something else. Of course the other horrible point in this article is that girls must not put out of the first date. You wonder why girls have LMR and ASD? Look no further than brainwashing shit like this. The underlying message is: 'guys are out to get pussy and girls don't really like sex. Girls if you like sex you are a slut.' Fuck that girls love the dick!)[/i][/color]

[color=#FF8000]He Says[/color]
1: She actually shows up. When you've been stood up as many times as I have, you feel a sense of relief when your date arrives. That feeling, however, can instantly vanish, like the time my date's father opened the front door wearing a flannel shirt and camouflage baseball cap. He then invited me to wait in the living room where he had conveniently spread his gun collection on a large table. I will never forget that experience. I also can't wait to have a daughter and do the same thing. No need to even mention curfew. [i][color=#0000FF](First of all, this guy has the worst inner game. He basically expects girls to flake on him and he is obviously not aware that you can do things to decrease the flake rate such as building more comfort and setting specific plans instead of saying 'let's hang out sometime.' Second, Why the fuck would you pick her up at her place anyway? Have her come to your house so her car is there and she gets famliar with your place. This way bringing her back to your place at the end of the date is easy.)[/color][/i]

2: Your date laughs the whole time you're together. This is especially good if she's laughing with you and not at the lettuce between your front teeth. If your date isn't laughing, then you're not entertaining her or she's not interested. Both are bad signs. If you're unsure whether she's laughing at you or with you, ask her on a second date. If she laughs out loud, then you know the answer. [color=#0000FF][i](Of course laughing is a good sign but how could you not know if she is laughing at you or with you. Either way, you are non reactive. This guy clearly checks in constantly and adjusts his frame to fit with his date's frame instead of being in his own reality. Also, I NEVER ask a girl on a second date while still on the first date. That again shows neediness.)[/i][/color]

3: She offers to split the bill with you. Where I'm from, this simply doesn't happen. Ever. Maybe that's because the male paying the bill is customary in my part of the country. Maybe it's the give and take of the dating ritual. Maybe it's just the women I tend to date. Whatever the reasoning, when a woman on a date offers to split the bill, it shows they appreciate that there's no such thing as a free meal. When that happens, hide the two-for-one coupon you planned to use. [i][color=#0000FF](Sure this may be a good sign but is not necessary in the least. You should be getting other more important signs from her that she likes you such as good reactions to your touch as you continually escalate through out the date. Also, DO NOT go to dinner on the first date--it is cliche, boring, doesn't allow for escalation, etc.)[/color][/i]

4: When you're out on the town with your date, she sees her girlfriends and insists they come over and meet you. This is a very good sign. It means you just passed the "good enough to be seen with in public" test. [i][color=#0000FF](This is his best point. No real problems here but just make sure to act normal and be cool with the friends. On the other hand, I have never had this happen. How often do you run into her friends on a date? Maybe he does because the girls plan it that way since they don't trust his needy ass!)[/color][/i]

5: Your first date is coming to an end, and you go to give her a sweet hug; and instead, she gives you a full-on smooch. Hello, Love! That sign is unmistakable -- unless she's been consuming alcoholic beverages and simply needed to grab you in order to keep her balance. When your date turns a friendly hug into a smooch be warned: Do not say anything! No matter what you say it won't be as romantic as in the movies. Instead, take a deep breath, savor the moment, feel the energy, wish her goodnight, and get out of there fast. You just positioned yourself for date #2! The question now is, when do you call... [i][color=#0000FF](WTF! Again this is why guys are not getting laid until months into a relationship. No mention of steady kino escalation until the BIG KISS at the end of the date. You should go for the kiss early in the date--after steadily leading up to it with kino and by the time you get back to YOUR place it should be a given that she is coming in for some making out and hopefully sex. The other problem here is he doesn't even advocate going for the kiss; instead he advises to go for a hug. That is weak and non dominant which translates into being unattractive. Even if you get shot down for the kiss, which has happened to me several times, then you just play it off by saying something like 'I understand, not in public,' and change the subject so as not to be a pouter. I think it was Mr. M who stated that most guys think that going for a kiss and getting shot down lowers their value but in his opinion (and mine) it actually raises it if done correctly because it shows you have the balls to escalate. Get out of there fast? Don't you want to get your dick wet?)[/color][/i]

[i][color=#0000FF]In conclusion, I was harsh with this article because I remember trying to follow shit advice like this before I found the community. And now I realize why I didn't get laid consistently--because I was doing stupid shit like this article suggests. I seriously can't believe these people get paid to dole out bad advice to AFCs that have also probably seen too many romantic comedies. I would bet money that the guy in this article doesn't get laid that often and probably takes anything he can get. I am so happy I found the community![/color][/i]

[Guest]

You also have to keep in mind man, most people still consider sex a "taboo" topic.

Even though women will have sex on the first date, theyll usually never admit that it was because they wanted to too. Unless of course they are party girls.

Most of the rest of the world hasn't caught on to what people in general really find attractive in others. Everything is surface value.

This society has positioned itself into making men less dominant, and it started with the feminist movements.

Not a bad thing really, but there is a difference between the sexes and that is undeniable. People just haven't caught onto this fact mainstream yet.

This community is actually alot larger than anyone cares to admit.

[Guest]

what a great article sal......im not into full pua mode yet, but just after reading this article, i can see the transition i've made from being fullblown AFC, needy, nice guy into somewhat of a pua.....i really really like this post....could lead into so many openers, comfort building stories.....