Dallas PUA

Hey guys,

I moved to Fort Worth last year from SoCal, bought a house at the end of last year and am getting settled. I am looking for a good group to go out sarging with and to help improve each other's game. I read a lot of theory and went out regularly in LA but never reached a level of success I was happy with. I had no problems pulling 5-6's and below but never figured out 7's+. And I'm not the type to settle. The guys I sarged with were mostly at a similar level, and that may be why I didn't progress further. I have taken some time off from going out while looking for a house, so I'm looking to make a fresh start.

For my strengths, I have a successful career that provides a comfortable lifestyle - relatively high-status job, decent house, nice car, enough money left over to travel and maintain interesting hobbies. I am smart, well-educated, analytical. I understand quite a bit of theory and am usually able to identify mistakes. I struggle with approach anxiety but am usually able to overcome it.

My weaknesses are pretty serious. I am somewhat out of shape, although not as much as I used to be. But most of all, I'm just nervous, particularly around attractive girls, and I am unable to hide it. I find it hard to avoid fidgeting, glancing around, looking like an AFC. I don't talk with a slow and authoritative tone, I lean in, and my conversation skills are pretty poor. I usually can't build attraction, at least with 7's+.

For starters, I think I need a good social circle in the metroplex area, a refresh on material, and lots of field time. I'm looking forward to getting involved with the community here.

That's all for now.

Aura

hey man I am new to the area as well, and actually new to this entire pua thing but something has to change for me as well. If your interested we could get some drinks and figure each other out and wing, since Im new I'd prob be ok with some 5's and 6's for now and I could try to help you overcome the 7's+ even though Im new. Message me back if your interested.

Aura wrote:For my strengths, I have a successful career that provides a comfortable lifestyle - relatively high-status job, decent house, nice car, enough money left over to travel and maintain interesting hobbies. I am smart, well-educated, analytical. I understand quite a bit of theory and am usually able to identify mistakes. I struggle with approach anxiety but am usually able to overcome it.

Being intelligent is a double edged sword. It can be one of the most attractive qualities to women but it can also be one of the inhibiting factors a man possesses. Like you, I'm a pretty intelligent person. I have a highly technical job that requires massive amounts of analysis. I work in the world of investment finance so it's required. Women almost never understand what I do, they just think it's hot that I know how to do this stuff. So, it's an asset. The key, is to downplay how smart you are in a technical sense and to show how intelligent you are socially. That's the Holy Grail of being smart with women.

When I started, one of my problems was thinking too much. Unfortunately, I used alcohol to turn off that analytical part of my brain. It worked for me but recently I've found a better teacher to help you turn that off. I've been boxing for about a year now. There's no time to think in the ring when some guy's trying to knock your head off. You learn to react. And, it bleeds into other aspects in your life. I sparred Saturday and I started to think once or twice during the match and both times that fucker made me pay. If you focus on nothing, you see everything. You might want to put some thought into boxing, MMA, karate, etc. Something that allows you to spar so you can learn to not think so much.

Aura wrote:My weaknesses are pretty serious. I am somewhat out of shape, although not as much as I used to be. But most of all, I'm just nervous, particularly around attractive girls, and I am unable to hide it. I find it hard to avoid fidgeting, glancing around, looking like an AFC. I don't talk with a slow and authoritative tone, I lean in, and my conversation skills are pretty poor. I usually can't build attraction, at least with 7's+.

Read my entry in this post:

viewtopic.php?f=7&t=4256

I think your problem is a lack of confience due to your physique. I say this because it's the first thing you mentioned as a negative and you rolled into being nervous around attractive girls. To me, that says that you think you're unattractive. Understand, that women don't really care that much about a man's physical appearance. In fact, most women find most men unattractive physically, they just care about other personality traits and characteristics so they're willing to look past it.

I used to have a horrible physique. About 8 years ago, I lost about 100lbs, then I started lifting and put a lot of muscle on my frame (using the techniques I outlined in the above link). Since then, my confidence has soared through the roof. I no longer think of my looks as an impedement to successfully attracting women (in fact, now, it's because I'm so damned picky). It's a great place to be when you're in set and women are constantly touching your arms and chest...usually they do it without knowing they're doing it. Then again, it's also a little creepy when you sister, mother, and aunts do it too...guess that's just how it goes.

For motivation, I've attached a link to the greatest set of words ever written about working out:

viewtopic.php?f=4&t=4263

Bull Run wrote:Being intelligent is a double edged sword. It can be one of the most attractive qualities to women but it can also be one of the inhibiting factors a man possesses. Like you, I'm a pretty intelligent person. I have a highly technical job that requires massive amounts of analysis. I work in the world of investment finance so it's required. Women almost never understand what I do, they just think it's hot that I know how to do this stuff. So, it's an asset. The key, is to downplay how smart you are in a technical sense and to show how intelligent you are socially. That's the Holy Grail of being smart with women.

Amen.

Bull Run wrote:When I started, one of my problems was thinking too much. Unfortunately, I used alcohol to turn off that analytical part of my brain. It worked for me but recently I've found a better teacher to help you turn that off. I've been boxing for about a year now. There's no time to think in the ring when some guy's trying to knock your head off. You learn to react. And, it bleeds into other aspects in your life. I sparred Saturday and I started to think once or twice during the match and both times that fucker made me pay. If you focus on nothing, you see everything. You might want to put some thought into boxing, MMA, karate, etc. Something that allows you to spar so you can learn to not think so much.

Good suggestion. I'll look into it.

Bull Run wrote:Read my entry in this post:

viewtopic.php?f=7&t=4256

I think your problem is a lack of confience due to your physique. I say this because it's the first thing you mentioned as a negative and you rolled into being nervous around attractive girls. To me, that says that you think you're unattractive. Understand, that women don't really care that much about a man's physical appearance. In fact, most women find most men unattractive physically, they just care about other personality traits and characteristics so they're willing to look past it.

I used to have a horrible physique. About 8 years ago, I lost about 100lbs, then I started lifting and put a lot of muscle on my frame (using the techniques I outlined in the above link). Since then, my confidence has soared through the roof. I no longer think of my looks as an impedement to successfully attracting women (in fact, now, it's because I'm so damned picky). It's a great place to be when you're in set and women are constantly touching your arms and chest...usually they do it without knowing they're doing it. Then again, it's also a little creepy when you sister, mother, and aunts do it too...guess that's just how it goes.

For motivation, I've attached a link to the greatest set of words ever written about working out:

viewtopic.php?f=4&t=4263

You could be right, at least partially. My problem is definitely lack of confidence, which I would attribute both to my physique and to many years of social ineptitude. Before a friend showed me The Pickup Artist on MTV I had no idea why I wasn't successful with women. Since then I've learend a lot but still get rejected far more often than not when I go out. I feel like I've been entrained to rejection and although I do have success here and there, subconsciously I'm still expecting to be blown out.

As for physique, I'm around 170 lb now and I think I need to hit at leat 160 before I'll be close to happy. I am keeping a regular gym schedule, so even though it won't be easy it should be straightforward.