decided not to lurk
Posted: Wed Nov 18, 2009 1:49 ammuch better to get real feedback.
So dudes, my name is Levi. I'm at a very fun but different time of my life. I discovered about "the community" about 4 months ago while I was in paramedic school when a friend who shall remain nameless exposed me to it. Initially I began with a lot of reading and after a while I did graduated to doing day game here and there. I was very antisocial for a long time, I kind of wore this identity shield as a protection shield to deal with fear of rejection. I was a competitive powerlifter from the time I was 12 years old. I completely obsessed myself in it and had this whole thing where people couldn't put me in a place of discomfort because I had already put myself there if that made since. There is a whole mess of things that set me in that direction from abusive parents, to bad experiences with the opposite sex when I was younger that I won't go into. I moved to Dallas after graduating to get away from home and pursue my goals in powerlifting. Now I realize that much of the scene I was involved in did nothing to help me grow as a person. I put too much emphasis on one area of my life and as a result I was unhappy. I've spent most of my energy improving my physical and economic health but nothing in the way of relationships and mental health. I feel much better with the work I have done on myself over the past 4 months but perfection is impossible in any aspect so there is endless room for improvement.
I do not want to be a PUA. I want to be better as a person. I know what its like to immerse myself in something and I know what it leads to and I'm determined not to do that again. I want all these things I enjoy to enhance my life and not be my life. So where I am at is learning pickup as a hobby. This looks like the place to do it.
So dudes, my name is Levi. I'm at a very fun but different time of my life. I discovered about "the community" about 4 months ago while I was in paramedic school when a friend who shall remain nameless exposed me to it. Initially I began with a lot of reading and after a while I did graduated to doing day game here and there. I was very antisocial for a long time, I kind of wore this identity shield as a protection shield to deal with fear of rejection. I was a competitive powerlifter from the time I was 12 years old. I completely obsessed myself in it and had this whole thing where people couldn't put me in a place of discomfort because I had already put myself there if that made since. There is a whole mess of things that set me in that direction from abusive parents, to bad experiences with the opposite sex when I was younger that I won't go into. I moved to Dallas after graduating to get away from home and pursue my goals in powerlifting. Now I realize that much of the scene I was involved in did nothing to help me grow as a person. I put too much emphasis on one area of my life and as a result I was unhappy. I've spent most of my energy improving my physical and economic health but nothing in the way of relationships and mental health. I feel much better with the work I have done on myself over the past 4 months but perfection is impossible in any aspect so there is endless room for improvement.
I do not want to be a PUA. I want to be better as a person. I know what its like to immerse myself in something and I know what it leads to and I'm determined not to do that again. I want all these things I enjoy to enhance my life and not be my life. So where I am at is learning pickup as a hobby. This looks like the place to do it.